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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Female Soprano: Why don't you strap on this here bunch of cardboard boxes daddy-o? Chorus: Joy of my desiring Female Soprano: You certainly look suave and get me hot. Chorus: Hot hot. Get me hot Female Soprano: And horny. If there's one thing I really get off on, it's a nun suit painted on some old boxes. Chorus: Some old melodies. Female Soprano: Four-four... an aura Chorus: An areola Female Soprano: Pink gums. Stumpy gray teeth. Chorus: Dental floss. Female Soprano: Gets me hot. Want to watch a dental hygiene movie? |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Centerville. A real nice place to raise your kids up. Centerville. It's really neat! Churches. Churches, and liquor stores. |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car? Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car? She's such a dignified lady, she's so pretty and soft. You can't call her a Groupie, it just pisses her off. She's got diamonds and jewelry, she's got lotsa new clothes. She ain't hurtin' nobody, so that everyone knows, that she knows what she wants, knows what she likes. Daddy, daddy, daddy. Daddy, daddy, daddy. Daddy, daddy, daddy. Look out... she's got her eyes on you. She left her place after midnight, she drove to the club. You know that her and her partner, came here lookin' for love. They want a guy from a group That's got a thing in a charts If your dick is a monster If your dick is a monster If your dick is a monster They will give him their hearts. 'Cause they know what they want, And they know what they like. Daddy, daddy, daddy. Daddy, daddy, daddy. Daddy, daddy, daddy. Look out... she's got her eyes on you. FAM-BAM-YAK-A-TA-TAHHH! They know what they want, They know what they like. Daddy, daddy, daddy...oooh Daddy, daddy, daddy...oooh Daddy, daddy, daddy...oooh. Aw right, you got 'em screamin' all night, screamin' all night. Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car? ( Do it, do it, d'ya wanna-wanna do, do it? ) Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car? Do it, do it, d'ya wanna-wanna do, do it? ) It's a cherry. You're a [?]. |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Chorus: Dew on the newts we got. Newt money dew. It's a payment on the rental for the dewy little newts we got. We got 'em dewy. Left 'em in the yard all night, though they didn't get uptight. The little vixens, the saucy little vixens, [? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?]. I know that they did not, did not, I know that they did not dash off into the night |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Half a dozen provocative squats! Out of the shower she squeezes her spots. Brushes her teeth. Shoots a deoderant spray up her twat... It's getting her getting her hot. It's getting her getting her hot. Oh-woh-woh-woh-woh-woh She's just twenty four and she can't get off. A sad, but typical case, yeah. The last dude to do her got in and got soft. She blew it and laughed in his face, yeah. Yeah. |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Chorus: 200 Motels 200 Motels han toon ran toon ran 200 Motels Jeff Simmons: I'm stealing the towels. |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: The clock upon the wall has struck the midnight hour. She finishes her call. Her girlfriend's in the shower. Practisissing, Practiss, Practising! |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Jimmy Carl Black (vocals) Jimmy Carl Black: My name is Burtram, I am a redneck. All my friends, they call me Burt. Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Hi, Burt! Jimmy Carl Black: All my family from down in Texas make their livin' diggin' dirt. Come out here to Californy just to find me some pretty girls. Ones I seen gets me so horny ruby lips, n'teeth like pearls. Wanna love 'em all. Wanna love 'em dearly. Wann pretty girl, I'll even pay ... I'll buy 'em furs. I'll buy 'em jewelry ... I know they like me. Here's what I'll say. I'm lonesome cowboy Burt. ( Speakin' atcha!) Come smell my fringe-y shirt. ( Reekin' atcha!) My cowboy pants, my cowboy dance, my bold advance. On this here waitress ... Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: He's lonesome cowboy Burt. Don'tcha get his feelings hurt. Jimmy Carl Black: Come on in this place an' I'll buy you a taste. You can sit on my face. Where's my waitress? Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Burtram, Burtram redneck. Burtram, Burtram redneck. Jimmy Carl Black: I'm an awful nice guy. Sweat all day in the sun. I'm a roofer by trade, quite a bundle I've made I'm unionized roofin' old Son-of-a-gun. Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: He's a unionized roofin' old son-of-a-gun. Jimmy Carl Black: When I get off, I get plastered. I drink till I fall on the floor. Find me some Communist bastard n' stomp on his face till he don't move no more. Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: He stomps on his face till he don't move no more. Jimmy Carl Black: I fuss an' I cuss and I keep on drinkin' till my eyes puff up an' turn red. I drool on m'shirt. I see if he's hurt. Then I kick him again in the head, let's Everybody: Kick him again in the head! Boys! Kick him again in the head! Now! Kick him again in the head! Jimmy Carl Black: I'm lonesome cowboy Burt. ( Speakin' atcha!) Come smell my fringe-y shirt. ( Reekin' atcha!) My cowboy pants, my cowboy dance, my bold advance. On this here waitress ... Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: He's lonesome cowboy Burt. Don'tcha get his feelings hurt. Jimmy Carl Black: Come on in this place an' I'll buy you a taste. You can sit on my face. Where's my waitress? Opal, you hot little bitch! |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Ooh the way you love me lady
I get so hard now I could die Ooh the way you love me sugar, I get so hard now I could die Open up your pocketbook Get another quarter out Drop it in the meter momma Try me on for size Open up your pocketbook Get another quarter out Drop it in the meter momma Try me on for size Ooh the way you squeeze me baby, Red balloons just pop behind my eyes Ooh the way you squeeze me girl, Red balloons just pop behind my eyes Open up your pocketbook Get another quarter out Drop it in the meter momma Try me on for size Open up your pocketbook Get another quarter out Drop it in the meter momma Try me on for size Mark: Do you really wanna please me? Howard: Well, you know I do, babe Mark: Well, tell me why you do it I really wanna know Howard: Oh, no, no, it wouldn't be right For me to tell you tonight Mark: You better tell me right away Or I'll pack up and go! Howard: Don't get mad It ain't no big thing Mark: You better tell me right away, Don't you treat me cold Howard: HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT! Well, there are a lot of reasons why I'd . . . I'd drag a girl such as yourself back to this . . . plastic hotel room and . . . rip you off for spare change to run a . . . to run a vibrating machine attached to this queen-size, bulk-purchase, kapok-infested, do-not-remove-tag-under-penalty-of-law type bed and . . . and make you take off all your little clothes . . . until you were nearly STARK RAVING NUDE! (Save for your chrome-with-heavy-duty-leather-thong Peace Medallion, heh . . . ) And make you assume a series of marginally erotic poses involving . . . a plastic chair and . . . an old guitar strap while I . . . did a wee-wee in your hair and . . . beat you with a pair of tennis shoes . . . I got from Jeff Beck |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Ooh the way you love me lady
I get so hard now I could die Ooh the way you love me sugar, I get so hard now I could die Open up your pocketbook Get another quarter out Drop it in the meter momma Try me on for size Open up your pocketbook Get another quarter out Drop it in the meter momma Try me on for size Ooh the way you squeeze me baby, Red balloons just pop behind my eyes Ooh the way you squeeze me girl, Red balloons just pop behind my eyes Open up your pocketbook Get another quarter out Drop it in the meter momma Try me on for size Open up your pocketbook Get another quarter out Drop it in the meter momma Try me on for size Mark: Do you really wanna please me? Howard: Well, you know I do, babe Mark: Well, tell me why you do it I really wanna know Howard: Oh, no, no, it wouldn't be right For me to tell you tonight Mark: You better tell me right away Or I'll pack up and go! Howard: Don't get mad It ain't no big thing Mark: You better tell me right away, Don't you treat me cold Howard: HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT! Well, there are a lot of reasons why I'd . . . I'd drag a girl such as yourself back to this . . . plastic hotel room and . . . rip you off for spare change to run a . . . to run a vibrating machine attached to this queen-size, bulk-purchase, kapok-infested, do-not-remove-tag-under-penalty-of-law type bed and . . . and make you take off all your little clothes . . . until you were nearly STARK RAVING NUDE! (Save for your chrome-with-heavy-duty-leather-thong Peace Medallion, heh . . . ) And make you assume a series of marginally erotic poses involving . . . a plastic chair and . . . an old guitar strap while I . . . did a wee-wee in your hair and . . . beat you with a pair of tennis shoes . . . I got from Jeff Beck |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Ow! Look out!
Ow! Look out! Ow! Look out! How long? How long? Till that mystery roach be arrivin' soon Ya-ooo Ya-ooo Ya-ooo Ya-ooo That mystery roach be approachin' That mystery roach be approachin' me La La La La La La La, Oof! How long? How long? Till that mystery roach been gone Ya-ooo-ooo-oo-ooo Ya-ooo-ooo-oo-ooo That mystery roach be approachin' That mystery roach be approachin' me La La La La La La La, Oof! That mystery roach be approachin' That mystery roach be approachin' me La La La La La La La, Oof! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery mystery roach! Ah! Hold it! Wait a minute! Stop that music! Please . . . Hold it! Wait a minute! Ah . . . What are we SINGING about? A mystery roach? We must be . . . FLIPPING OUT! |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman: Penis dimension. Howard Kaylan: Penis dimension. Everybody: Penis dimension is worrying me. I can't hardly sleep at night 'Cause of penis dimension Do you worry? Do you worry a lot? No! Do you worry? Do you worry and moan ... That the size of your cock is not monsrtous enough? It's your penis dimension! Penis dimension! Howard Kaylan: Wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah Mark Volman: Hiya friends. Now just be honest about it. Did you ever consider the possibliity that your penis, and in the case of many dignified ladies, that the size of the titties themselves might provide elements of subconscious tension? Weird, twisted anxieties that could force a human being to have to become a politician. A policeman. A jesuit monk. A rock and roll guitar player. A wino. You name it. Or in the case of the ladies, the ones that can't afford a silicone beef-up, may become writers of hot books. Howard Kaylan: "Manuel, the gardener, placed his burning phallus in her quivering quim." Mark Volman: Yes, or they become Carmelite nuns. Howard Kaylan: "Gonzo, the lead guitar player, placed his mutated member in her slithering slit." Ha ha ha! Mark Volman: Ooh, or racehorse jockeys. There is no reason why you, or your loved one should suffer. Things are bad enough, without the size of your organ adding even more misery to the troubles of the world. Howard Kaylan: Right on, right on! Mark Volman: Now, if your a lady and you've got munchkin tits, you can console yourself with this age-old line from primary school: Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Anything over a mouthful, is wasted. Mark Volman: Yes! and isn't it the truth? And if you're a guy, one night you're at a party and you're trying to be cool, I mean, you aren't even wearing any underwear your being so cool, and somebody hits on you one night, and looks you up and down and he says uh, Howard Kaylan: Eight inches or less? Mark Volman: Well let me tell you, brother, that's the time when you got to turn around and look that son of a bitch right between the eyes. And you got to tell him these words: |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Jimmy Carl Black: Hey, who are these dudes? Are you a boy, or a girl? Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. What the fuck was that? I wonder if that son of a bitch can play something I might even like. Hey twerp, play me something I can enjoy. |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Theodor Bikel: Ladies and gentlemen! Chorus: 200 motels Theodor Bikel: 200 motels.. Life on the road. Theodor Bikel: Ladies and gentlemen! and here he is.. Who? Larry the dwarf. Larry likes to dress up funny. Tonight he's dressed up like Frank Zappa. Let's ask him "What's the deal?" |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: She painted up her face. She sat before the mirror. She painted up her face. She drew the mirror nearer. Practisissing, Practiss, Practising! The STARE The STARE The secret stare she would use if a worthy-looking victim should appear. Practisissing, Practiss, Practising! ( Ah-hoo-ah-hoo-wah-hoo-wahhhh ) Practisissing, Practiss, Practising! |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: She chooses all the clothes she'll wear tonight to dance in. (She dances, she prances, she dances, she prances) The places that she goes are filled with guys from groups, yeah-yeah-yeah Waiting for a chance to break her pants in. Provocative squats! Gum me on m'lunga Provocative squats! Gum me on m'lunga Provocative squats! Gum me on m'lunga Provocative squats! Gum me on m'lunga Wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah Wah wah wah wah wah wah Well at least there's sort of a choice there. (Twenty or thirty at times there have been ) Somewhat desirable boys there. Dressed really spiffy with long hair. Waiting for girls they can shove it right in. Wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah Wah wah wah wah wah wah Well at least there's sort of a choice there. (Twenty or thirty at times there have been ) Somewhat desirable boys there. Dressed really spiffy with long hair. Waiting for girls they can shove it right in. |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Theodor Bikel: This, as you might have guessed, is the end of the movie. The entire cast is assembled here at the Centerville Recreational Facility to bid farewell to you, and to express thanks for your attendance at this theatre. This might seem old fashioned to some of you, but I'd like to join in on this song. It's the kind of a sentimental song that you get at the end of a movie. It's the kind of a song that people might sing to let you in the audience know that we really like you and care about you. We uh, understand how hard it is to laugh these days, with all the terrible problems in the world. Lord, have mercy on the people in England, for the terrible food these people must eat. ( Errrr, excuse me ) And may the lord have mercy on the fate of this movie and God bless the mind of the man in the street. Chorus: Help all the rednecks and the flatfoot policemen through the terrible functions they all must perform. God help the winos, the junkies, and the weirdos, Female Soprano: And every poor soul who's adrift in the storm. Chorus: Help everybody, so they all get some action, some love on the weekend, some real satisfaction. Female Soprano: A room and a meal And a garbage disposal A lawn and a hose'll Be strictly genteel. Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Reach out your hand to the girl in the dog book, the girl in the pig book, and the one with the horse. Make sure they keep all those businessmen happy and the purple-lipped censors and the Germans of course. Chorus: Help everybody, so they all get some action, some love on the weekend, some real satisfaction. Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: A Swedish apparatus with a hood and a bludgeon with a microwave oven. "Honey, how do it feel?" Everybody: Yeah Ahhh Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Lord, have mercy on the hippies and faggots and the dykes and the weird little children they grow. Help the black man. Help the poor man. Help the milk man. Help the door man. Help the lonely, neglected old farts that I know. Theodore Bikel: It's been swell havin' you with us tonight folks. Mark Volman: But, don't leave the theatre yet, 'cause there's still more to come, but before we go on, I want to introduce to you my friend and musical associate, Howard Kaylan, who's going to give us all a final closing benediction. Howard Kaylan: They're going to clear out the studio... They're going to tear down all the... They're going to whip down all the... They're going to sweep out all the... They're going to pay off all the... Mark Volman: (oh, yeah!) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: And then... and then... and then... and then... Hey hey hey, everybody in the orchestra and the chorus Aww now, every one of our lovely and talented dancers the light bulb men, camera men, make-up men Mark Volman: (The fake-up men) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: And, the rake-up men. Jimmy Carl Black: (Especially Herbie Cohen, yeahoooo...) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: They're all going to rise up. They're going to jump up! I said jump up! Talkin' 'bout jump right up on off the floor. Jump right up and hit the door! Mark Volman: They're all going to rise up, and jump off. Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: They're going to ride on home. They're going to ride on home. They're going to ride on home. They're going to ride on home. Howard Kaylan: And once again take themselves seriously. Yeah, Two, three, four, seriously. Mark Volman: They're all going to go home, Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Through the driving sleet and rain Mark Volman: They're all going to go home, Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: through the fog, through the dust. Through the tropical fever and the blistering frost. Mark Volman: They're all going to go home. Howard Kaylan: And get out of it as they can be. Jimmy Carl Black: And the same goes for me. Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Howard Kaylan: And each and every member of this rock oriented comedy group in his own special way is going to get out of it as he can be. Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: They're all going to get wasted. They're all going to get twisted. They're all going to get wasted. They're all going to get twisted. Howard Kaylan: And I am definitely going to get .... Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: REAMED Howard Kaylan: 'Cause I'm such a lonely.. I'm such a lonely.. a lonely, lonely, talkin' 'bout a lonely guy. Oh, and I know tonight, I am definitely... I am positively... I just have to get... Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: Bent, reamed and wasted. Jimmy Carl Black: A disaster area the size of Atlantic City, New Jersey. Howard Kaylan: He's making me do this, ladies and gentlemen. I wouldn't do it if it weren't for this. You noticed, all through this material, I've been glancing over toward my left? Well, I'll tell you the reason for that ladies and gentlemen. HE is over there. HE is over on the left. HE is the guy that is making me do all this shit. Right over there. Now all through this movie, every time we've been on stage, I've had to look over in that direction, right? You saw it... you know! Well that's 'cause HE's over there. I've got to watch him for signs. He jumps up and down like a jackass. I can't even believe the guy sometimes. But we gotta watch him. "After all," we said, "it's Frank's movie." Now, we're THE MOTHERS, but it's still Frank's movie. He rented the studio, had all these cheesy sets built...it's so moche!. He's telling everybody, right now, right over there to...(text obscured by disaster area, fades out) |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Male Tenore: The girl wants to fix him some broth. Female Soprano: Tinselcock! Chorus: Tinselcock! Female Soprano: Would you like some broth? Male Tenore: Some nice soup. Female Soprano: Some hot broth. Male Tenore: Small dogs in it. Female Soprano: Do you Male Tenore: You like broth? Dog broth. Female Soprano: Hot broth. Male Tenore: You like dog broth hot? How do you like it? The four styles of it the breathe broth breath, and the ever popular hygienic European version, Tinselcock! Tinselcock! Chorus: Tinselcock! Male Tenore: Which do you choose? |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Chorus: The lad searches the night for his newts. |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: This town.. this town.. is just a Sealed Tuna Sandwich. Sealed Tuna Sandwich with the wrapper glued ... It's by baloney on the rack It goes for 40 cents a whack. It's just a rancid little snack in a plastic bag from a matron in La Habre with a blown-out crack who dies to suck the fringe off of Jimmy Carl Black. |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark volman (vocals)
Howard kaylan (vocals) Ian underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley dunbar (drums) George duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin lickert (bass) Ruth underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim pons (vocals) Mark volman & howard kaylan: This town.. this town.. This town we're in is just a Sealed tuna sandwich with the wrapper glued. Mark volman: We get a few in every tour. ? ? : They're always such a fucking bore. I can't wait till we blow this town and Work a place with some local hot action! |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark volman (vocals)
Howard kaylan (vocals) Ian underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley dunbar (drums) George duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin lickert (bass) Ruth underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim pons (vocals) Mark volman & howard kaylan: This town.. this town.. This town we're in is just a Sealed tuna sandwich with the wrapper glued. Mark volman: We get a few in every tour. ? ? : They're always such a fucking bore. I can't wait till we blow this town and Work a place with some local hot action! |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: This town.. this town.. is just a Sealed Tuna Sandwich. Sealed Tuna Sandwich with the wrapper glued ... It's by baloney on the rack It goes for 40 cents a whack. It's just a place for us to play to help us pay the cost of the tickets back to L.A. the cost of the tickets back to L.A. the cost of the tickets back to L.A. Chorus: All the people in the Sandwich Town think the place is great. What if part of it's crumbling down? Most of them prob'ly won't be 'round ... Howard Kaylan: They'll either be dead.. Mark Volman: or moved to San Francisco. Howard Kaylan: ( Where everybody thinks they're Heavy Business. But it's just a Tuna Sandwich from another catering service. ) |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007)
Mark Volman (vocals)
Howard Kaylan (vocals) Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) George Duke (keyboards, trombone) Martin Lickert (bass) Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set) Jim Pons (vocals) Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan: What will this evening bring me this morning? What will this evening bring me this morning? Dawn will arrive without any warning. What will I say the next day to whatever I drag to my hotel tonight? (If things go alright.) What will I say the next day to whatever I drag to my hotel tonight? ( Will she be outasite?) What will this evening bring me this morning? What will this evening bring me this morning? A succulent fat one! A mod little flat one, maybe a hot one (to give me the clap!) maybe a freak who gets off with a strap. {repeat and fade out} What will I say the next day to whatever I drag to my hotel tonight? (If things go alright.) What will I say the next day to whatever I drag to my hotel tonight? ( Will she be outasite?) |
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from Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa`S 200 Motels (2007) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Just Another Band From L.A (2007)
Mark Volman (lead vocals)
Howard Kaylan (lead vocals) Ian Underwood (woodwinds, keyboards, vocals) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) Don Preston (keyboards, mini-moog) Jim Pons (bass, vocals) Billy the Mountain Billy the Mountain A regular picturesque Postcardy mountain Residing between lovely Rosamond and Gorman With his stunning wife Ethel A tree, a tree. Billy was a Mountain Ethel was a tree growing off of his shoulder Billy was a Mountain Billy was a Mountain Ethel was a tree growing off of his shoulder Ethel was a tree growing off of his shoulder ( Hey, hey, hey! ) Billy had two big Caves for eyes With a cliff for a jaw That would go up or down And whenever it did He'd puff out some dust And hack up a boulder, hack. Hack up a boulder, hack, hack. Hack up a boulder, hack, hack. Hack up a boulder. Now, one day, and I believe it was on Tuesday, a man in checkered double-knit suit drove up in large El Dorado Cadillac leased from Bob Spreene ( "Where the freeways meet in Downey!" ) and he laid a huge bulging envelope right at the corner of BILLY THE MOUNTAIN, that was right where his foot was supposed to be. Now BILLY THE MOUNTAIN, he couldn't believe it: All those postcards he'd posed for, for all of those years, and finally, now at last, his royalties! "Royalties, royalties, royalties! The royalty check is in, honey!" ... Yes, BILLY THE MOUNTAIN was rich! Yes, and his eyeball caves, they widened in amazement... and his jaw, which was a cliff, well it ... it dropped thirty feet! A bunch of dust puffed out ... rocks and boulders hacked up, hack! hack! ... crushing the Lincoln ... I gave him the money He acted real funny He hacked up a rock and It totaled my car Oh do you Know any trucks Might be bound for the valley I don't wanna stand here All night in this bar ( Dear Lord ) I don't wanna stand here All night in this bar ( No shit ) I don't wanna stand here All night in this bar By two o'clock, when bars had already closed down, Billy had broken the big news to Ethel, AHHHH, and with dust and boulders everywhere, Billy, choked with exitement, announced: "Ethel, we're going on a vacation!"... Yes, and they were going on a vacation, oh, and Ethel, Ethel, Ethel, like any little woman, she of course was very excited ... she creaked a little bit, and some old birds flew off of her. Billy told Ethel they were going to... yes, they where going to New York! "Ethel, we're going to... New York! But first they were gonna stop in Las Vegas... "It's off to Las Vegas to check out the lounges, Pull a few handles and drink a few beers, oh Ethel, Ethel, my darling, you know that I love you, I'm glad we could have a vacation this year, Oh neat-o, glad we could have a vacation this year." They left that night, crunchin' across the Mojave Desert, their voices echoing thru the canyons of your minds... "Ethel, wanna get a cuppa cawfee? Howard Johnson's, ahhh there's a Howard Johnson's! ... Wanna eat some clams? ... The first noteworthy piece of real estate they destroyed was Edwards Air Force Base. And to this very day, wing-nuts and data reduction clerks alike speak in reverent whispers about that fateful night when Test Stand Number One and the rocket sled itself got LUNCHED, I said LUNCHED, by a famous mountain and his small wooden wife ... "Word just in to the KTTV news service undeniably links this mountain and his wife to drug abuse and payoffs as part of San Joaquin Valley smut ring. However, we can assure parents in the Southern California area that a recent narcotic crackdown in Torrence ... Hawthorne ... Lomita ... Westchester ... Playa del Rey ... Santa Monica ... Tujunga ... Sunland ... San Fernando ... Pacoima ... Sylmar ... Newhall ... Canoga Park ... Palmdale ... Glendale ... Irwindale ... Rolling Hills ... Granada Hills ... Shadow Hills ... Cheviot Hills ... will provide the secret evidence the Palmdale Grand Jury has needed to seek a criminal indictement and pave the way for stiffer legislation, increased federal aid, and avert a crippling strike of bartenders and veterinarians throughout the inland empire ..." Within the week, Jerry Lewis had hosted a telethon ( La La La nice lady ) to raise funds for the injured, "injured", and homeless, "homeless" in Glendale, as Billy had just levelled it. And a few miles right outside of town Billy caused a 'Oh mine/my(?) papa' in the earth's crust, right over the secret underground dumps, right near the Jack In The Box on Glenoaks where they keep the pools of old poison gas and obsolete germs bombs, just as a freak tornado cruised through ... Yes, it was about three o'clock in the afternoon when little Howard Kaplan was sitting on his porch ( "Toto...!" ) just playing ( "Come here, Toto ...!" ) and having a nice time with his little accordion, ( "Toto...!" ) and this weird wind came up, direct from Glendale, blowing those terrible germs in his direction ... and all this caused by huge mountain ( "Aunty Em" ) somewhere over the rainbow, blue birds fly, sucking up two-thirds of it ( suck, suck, suck) for an untimely dispersal over vast stretches of ... WATTS!!! Now, unless I misunderstood, it was right outside of Columbus, Ohio when Billy received his notice to report for his induction physical. Now lemme tell ya, Ethel said, now Ethel, Ethel said she wasn't gonna let him go ... "I'm not gonna let you go, Billy" ... that's right, we now have confirmed reports from an informed Orange County minister that Ethel is still an active communist and it is this reporter's opinion that she also practices covert WITCH-CRAFT ... It was about this time that the telephone rang inside of the secret briefcase belonging to one mortal man who might be able to stop all of this senseless destruction and save America herself. And I'm sorry to disappoint some of you, it was not Chief Redden. This one man was Studebacher Hoch, fantastic new super hero of the current economic slump. Now, some folks say he looked like Zubin Mehta (Zubin Mehta); still others say "Bullshit, honey, it was just another greasy guy who happened to be born next to the frozen beef pies at Boney's Market..."; still others say "Pshaw, and piss on you, Jack, he's just a crazy Italian who drove a red car ..." You see, nobody ever really knew for sure because Studebacher was sooooo mysterious .... He was so ( he was so, he was so) mysterious He was so ( he was so, he was so) mysterious 'Cuz when a person gets to be such a hero, folks And marvelouse beyond compute You can never really tell about a guy like that Whether he's really a nice person Or if he just smiles a lot Or if he has a son named Pinocchio or what. Whether he's really a nice person Or if he has a son named Pinocchio or what. Some men say he could fly Some men say he could swim Others say he could sing like Neil Sedaka, And all the girls in Flushing would be amazed of him Two, three amazed of him ... amazed ... Time passed. January, February, March, July, Wednesday, August, Irwindale, two-thirty in the afternoon, Sunday, Monday, Funny Cars, Walnuts, City of Industry, Big John Masamanian ... So when the phone ring in the secret briefcase, a strong masculine hand with a Dudley Do-Right wristwatch and flexy braclet grabbed it and answered in a deep, calmly assured voice: "So... ah... yeah, yeah hello already ... what? ... well, yeah? ... Ah-are you kidding? ... You're not kidding ... a mountain ... with a tree growing off of its shoulder? Aw, you're fulla shit, man... ah listen, by the way, before you go on; did you get those white albums I sent ya with the pencil on the front, yeah? Yeah, you should move some of those for me ... We're having a lot of,...listen, so kiss little Jakee on the head... and how's your wife's hemorrhoids?...ah, that's too bad...Listen...so you've got a mountain, with a tree, listen, causing...well, let me write this down... sorta take a few notes here...yeah? ...to El Segundo, huh?...causing untold destruction..( my baby, my baby )...wanted for draft evasion?... an expense account? ... and per diem, too?..." SOME MEN SAY HE COULD DANCE They said he could dance And of course they were right ... Ladies and gentelmen, this is it: The Studebacher Hoch Dancing Lesson & Cosmic Prayer For Guidence, featuring Aynsley Dunbar! ... HIT IT! ... TWIRLY, TWIRLY, TWIRLY, TWIRLY, TWIRLY, Fillmore ... Hey, right hand from a heart Left hand from a heart Right hand from a heart Left hand from a left shoulder To the heart. Fillmore, Fillmore ... Nobody can dance like Studebacher Hoch ... So many rumors have spread about Studebacher Hoch ... consider this rumor which was published about three weeks ago in ROLLING STONE ( "oh, it's gotta be true! ) ... Studebacher Hoch can write the Lord's Prayer on the head of a pin!" (NO!) do-do-do do-do-doot doot do-do-do ... ... I'm so hip ... beef pies ... he was born next to the beef pies, underneath Joni Mitchell's autographed picture, right beside Elliot Robert's big bank book, next to the boat where Crosby flushed away all his stash and the cops got him in the boat and drove away, to the can where Neil Young slipped another disc ... ( Frozen ??? pie Frozen ??? pie Frozen ??? pie And that was the main influence on him The influence of a frozen beef pie ) Boldly springing into action he phoned his wife who ran a modeling school, whereupon he... yes, he ran around the back of the Broadway at Hollywood Boulevard and Vine to see if he could find himself some big, large, unused cardboard boxes ( no shit! )... after which he hit up the Ralph's on Sunset for some Aunt Jemima syrup, some Kaiser boiler foil and pair of blunt sissors, yeah! ... yes, and in the parking lot of Ralph's ... where no prices are lower prices than Ralph's... in the parking lot of Ralph's, in between a pair of customized trucks where nobody was looking, he cut out some really, really, really nice wings and he covered them thoroughly with foil ... Then he took those wings and wedged one under each of his powerful arms and sneaked into a telephone booth ..YES,YES!! And then he shut the fucking door! ... And he pulled down his blue denim policeman-type trouser pants, and he spread even amounts of Aunt Jemima maple syrup all over the inside of his legs! ... Soon the booth was filling with flies ( help me! help me! help me! ) ... He held open the legs of his boxer shorts so they could all get in, and when each and every one of those little cocksucking flies had gone into his pants and they were lapping up all that maple syrup, he bent over and he put his head between his legs and he said in a very clear, impressive, Ron Hubbard-type voice: "New York" ... And the booth and everything lifted up, out of parking lot, and into the sky. Studebacher Hoch YEAH, YEAH, Studebacher Hoch Studebacher Hoch Studebacher Hoch YEAH, YEAH, Studebacher Hoch Studebacher Hoch He's coating his legs With Aunt Jemima syrup up and down His shorts will be filled with flies That will be buzzing all around Studebacher Hoch is really outa sight Studebacher Hoch, he does it every night Studebacher Hoch, he treats the flies all right Studebacher Hoch That's why they never bite, hey! Hey please to New York Fly to New York He could be a dog Or a frog Or a lesbian queen (Fly to New York) He could be a narc Or a lady marine Or he might play dirty He's over thirty Getting old ... I don't know His peculiar attire And the flies he requires Keep leading him on 'Cuz Ethel is gone They keep leading him on 'Cuz Ethel is gone And the mountain she's on And speaking of mountains - - we'll join Studebacher Hoch on the edge of BILLY THE MOUNTAIN's mouth .. take it away! ... "Ah ... ya, ya, ya, hey-ah, Billy, listen ... I've come to reason with you ... our great country needs you in the armed forces ... Your number came up ... ya can't go on running like this forever ..." Ah, but Ethel just shook her twigs angrily. But Studebacher Hoch, calm, cool, collected and unperturbed, continued: "Ya, well listen ... listen you communist sonofabitch ... you better get your ass down there for your fuckin' physical or I'll see to it that you get used for fill dirt in some impending New Jersey marsh reclamation ... And your girlfiend there will wind up disguised as series of brooms, primative ironing boards or a dog house ... get the ( cough, cough ) get the picture?" Ya, well Billy just laughed: "Ha, ha, ha. If they think they're gonna draft me, they're crazy." Unfortunately, because Studebacher Hoch was standing on the edge of BILLY THE MOUNTAIN's mouth when the giant mountain laughed ... Studebacher Hoch lost his footing and fell screaming, two hundred feet into the rubble below ... ( "Aaahhhhh, oh fuck, I'm gonna need a truss ..." ) Ah listen, that only goes to show you And it'l show you once again that A mountain is something you don't wanna fuck with You don't wanna fuck with Don't fuck around Don't fuck around Don't fuck with Billy, No And don't fuck with Ethel You saw what just happened To the guy with the flies Don't fuck around Don't fuck around Don't fuck around Don't fuck around Don't fuck around Don't fuck around Don't fuck around With Biddilly, Biddilly Biddilly The Mountain Eddie, are you kidding? Eddie, are you kidding? Oh I forgot to mention this is where we take our intermission. we will see you in a few minutes Thank you, We'll be back. |
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from Frank Zappa - Just Another Band From L.A (2007) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Just Another Band From L.A (2007)
Mark Volman (lead vocals)
Howard Kaylan (lead vocals) Ian Underwood (woodwinds, keyboards, vocals) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) Don Preston (keyboards, mini-moog) Jim Pons (bass, vocals) Primer mi carucha, chevy '39 Going to El Monte Legion Stadium Pick up on my weesa, she is so divine Helps me stealing hubcaps, wasted all the time Fuzzy dice, bongos in the back My ship of love is ready to attack |
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from Frank Zappa - Just Another Band From L.A (2007) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Just Another Band From L.A (2007)
Mark Volman (lead vocals)
Howard Kaylan (lead vocals) Ian Underwood (woodwinds, keyboards, vocals) Aynsley Dunbar (drums) Don Preston (keyboards, mini-moog) Jim Pons (bass, vocals) There was a man A little ole man Who lived in Montreal With a wife and a kid And a car and a house And a teenage daughter With a see-thru blouse Who loved to grunt and ball - - And her name was Magdalena The little ole man Came home one night To his house in Montreal. He caught his daughter In the blouse by the light And he said to himself: "She looks all right!" And he reached for a tit And grabbed it tight And threw her up Against the wall (BLUE CROSS!) Magdalena, my daughter dear, Do not be concerned when your Canadian daddy comes near. My daughter dear Do not be concerned when your Canadian daddy comes near. I work so hard, Don't you understand, Making maple syrup For the pancakes of our land. Do you have any idea What that can do to a man What that can do to a man? Do you have any idea What that can do to a man What that can do to a man? The little ole man With the grubby little hand Who lived in Montreal Was drooling a bit As he reached for her tit And he said to himself: "This gonna be it!" But the girl turned around And said: "Go eat shit!" And ran on down the hall. Right on, Magdalena! My daughter dear, Do not be concerned when your Canadian daddy comes near. My daughter dear Do not be concerned when your Canadian daddy comes near. I work so hard, Don't you understand, Making maple syrup For the pancakes of our land. Do you have any idea? What that can do to a man What that can do to a man? Do you have any idea? What that can do to a man What that can do to a man? Magdalena, don't you tease me like this Right in the hallway with your blouse and your tits If your mommy ever finds us like this She'll call a lawyer, oh how mom will be pissed DOODLE DOODLE DOODLE DUH-DUH DEE-UH DOODLE DOODLE DOODLE DUH-DUH DEE-UH Magdalena, Magdalena, Magdalena, Magdalena, daughter of the smog-filled winds of Los Angeles, I'd like to take you in the closet and take off your little clothes until you're virtually stark raving nude, spread mayonaise and kaopectate all over your body and take you down to Hollywood Boulevard and we can, we can walk down the streets by the stars that say John Provost and Leo G. Carrol together, Baby. We can go dancing up at the Cina Grill ... can't you see it: Frank Pernell and us, until dark ... don't you understand, my Baby ... I didn't mean, I didn't need, I mean ... it was so hard for me ... I just ... I saw you standing under the Shell pest strip late last night, in the light, with your little nipples protruding through your little see-thru thingie...and I just said 'My god, my god, I gave my sperm to this thing'...and now I just,...oh you got me so hard, I just, I don't know what to do Magdalena, don't you understand? So I grabbed you - but, but don't hold it against me - I mean, your mom will never know, Baby ... and I wantcha to come back to me... I mean... do you understand me?... I want you to... I'm down on my knees to ya, Magdalena... I wantcha ta walk back to me, Baby... I wantcha to turn around by the Sparkletts machine... that's it! that's it!... in the little chartreuse hallway with the little neon Jesus picture on the wall... and I want you to step, Baby, I want you to walk back in your f ive inch spike heels that you got at Frederick's, same time you and your mommy got that crotchless underwear last year for the christmas... and I want you to stroll back to me, Baby... Walk back Baby, dontcha understand me Baby... I want you to walk back... I'm down on bended knees, Baby... I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I wanna take off your little trainig bra...Don't you understand me. I'm gonna take off you little maroon hot pants... I'm gonna get down on my knees, Baby... dontcha understand what I'm saying to you... your mom will never know... she's playing bridge with the girls... and you and I... you and I will... Baby, it's just you and I... dontcha understand... we can make love all night long... nobody will ever know... come on, Magdalena! ...please, little girl... walk back to your daddy... what did I do that was so wrong?...my god, I was only following the sexual impulse like I heard on the Johnny Carson Show...from a book or something I wrote, I didn't know what I was doing...I got carried away... walk bac k, oh please, to your daddy!... come on, Magdalena... to your daddy, Baby... your mom will never know... come back to you daddy!... |
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from Frank Zappa - Waka/ Jawaka (2007) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Waka/ Jawaka (2007)
If the froggy come up-a with his satchel in his hand,
Then he reach in the front and dump a mile of sand Across the rug, along the hall, up to the umbrella stand That you've been watchin' all the time Watchin' all the time And if a forest grows up from the dirt on the floor That the frog with the satchel had just dumped beside the door You just startin' to get worried, you ain't going out no more And it's confusin' to your mind - just consider this: You can be scared when it gets too real You can be scared when it gets too real But you should be diggin' it while it's happening Yes! You should be diggin' it while it's happening 'Cause it just might be a one-shot deal You can be lost and you can wanna be found But keep an eye on that frog whenever he jump around Just keep a-watchin' him You oughta be watchin' him Just keep a-watchin' him You wanna be watchin' him And see if he has brought along a little bag for you Rant! |
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from Frank Zappa - Waka/ Jawaka (2007) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Waka/ Jawaka (2007)
Your mouth is your religion
You put your faith in a hole like that? You put your trust and your belief above your jaw And no relief have I found I heard your story when you come home You said you went to see your sister last night Well, you might loose a bunch of teeth And find a funeral wreath While you'll be laying in the ground all alone So tell me where are you coming from with all them lines As you stumble in at the breakin' of the day Where are you coming from, my shot-gun say Because he just might want to blow you away 'Cause he just might want to blow you away An evil woman can make ya cry If you believe her every time she lies Well you can be a big fool If she makes you loose your cool, and so I've got me some advice you should try Just let her talk a little Just let her talk a little more Just... let her talk a little more And when she runs out of words Just say the same thing that I told you before... Tell me where are you coming from with all them lines As you stumble in at the breakin' of the day Where are you coming from, my shot-gun say Because he just might want to blow you away 'Cause he just might want to blow you away |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Baby Snakes
Late at night is when they come out Baby Snakes Sure you know what I'm talkin' about Pink 'n' wet They make the best kinda pet Baby Baby Snakes Looked around An' there's a couple right near me Baby Snakes Maybe I think they can probably hear me Pink 'n' wet I'll take all I can get Baby Baby Sna-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-kes, Yeah They live in a ho-ho-hole (Tiny hole) That is usually empty (usually empty, tiny too) They live by a code (Dit dit dit dit) That is usually SMPTE Which stands for *Society of Motion Picture & Television Engineers* Maybe I think That is what keeps them in sync They're wet 'n' they're pink I think I'll give 'em a, give 'em a, Give 'em a drink Baby Sna-a-a-a-a-akesss |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
(Ooh . . . )
A real hologram! (We sure do!) I mean: not real, but almost a real hologram Hey there, people, I'm Bobby Brown They say I'm the cutest boy in town My car is fast, my teeth is shiney Tell all the girls they can kiss my heinie (Tiny heinie ho!) Here I am at a famous school (Gonna fly now) I'm dressin' sharp I'm actin' cool I got a cheerleader here wants to help with my paper Let her do all the work 'n maybe later I'll rape her Oh God I am the American dream I do not think I'm too extreme An' I'm a handsome son-of-a-bitch Gonna get a good job 'n be real rich (Get a good, get a good, get a good, get a good . . . ) Women's Liberation Came creepin' across the nation I tell you people, I was not ready When I fucked this dyke by the name of Freddie She made a little speech then, Aw, she tried to make me say when She had my balls in a vice, but she left the dick I guess it's still hooked on, but now it shoots too quick Oh God I am the American dream But now I smell like Vaseline An' I'm a miserable sonofabitch Am I a boy or a lady . . . I don't know which (I wonder wonder, Hi-Yo, Silver!) So I went out 'n bought me a leisure mask I jingle my change, but I'm still kinda cute Got a job doin' radio promo (Gonna fly now) An' none of the jocks can even tell i'm a homo Eventually me 'n a friend Sorta of drifted along into S&M (YA!) I can take about an hour on the tower of power 'Long as I gets a little golden shower Oh God I am the American dream With a spindle up my butt till it makes me scream An' I'll do anything to get ahead Hi-Yo, Silver! Oh God, Oh God, I'm so fan . . . Hi-Yo, Silver! And my name is Bobby Brown And my name is Bobby Brown Hi-Yo, Silver! Away! And my name is Bobby Brown Hi-Yo, Silver! |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) Hey! Do you know what you are? You're an asshole! An ASSHOLE! Some of you might not agree 'Cause you probably likes a lot of misery But think a while and you will see... Broken hearts are for assholes Broken hearts are for assholes Are you an asshole? Broken hearts are for assholes Are you an asshole too? Whatcha gonna do, 'cause you're an asshole... Maybe you think you're a lonely guy Maybe you think you're too tough to cry So you went to The Grape, Just to give it a try And Dagmar Without a doubt, the ugliest sonofabitch I ever saw in my life Was his name... One Two Three Four! The whiskers sticking out from underneath of his Pancake make-up And yet he was a beautiful lady Nearly drove you insane Let's talk about Leather: LEATHERRRRRR And so you kissed a little sailor Tex Abel, starring in the latest Shepperton Production: Who had just blew in from Spain Sir Richard Pump-A-Loaf You sniffed the reeking buns of Angel The story of a demented bread-boffer And acted like it was cocaine Cucumber pud annexed to a fine whole-wheat loaf You were dazzled by the exciting new costume of Ko-Ko Then on Tuesday night, Ceasar's back in town In a way you can't explain Facing off in a no-holds-barred tag team grudge match With Kona. And so you worked the wall with Michael Three-hundred-seventy-nine pounds of Samoan dynamite Which gave your back an awful strain Volcanic Hell But you came back on Sunday for the gong show Next Thursday, teen town's finest... But you forgot what I was sayin' 'Cause you're an asshole, You're an asshole That's right You're an asshole, you're an asshole Yes, yes You're an asshole, you're an asshole That's right You're an asshole, you're an asshole Now you been to The Grape 'n' you been to The Chest 'N' now I think you know what you are: you're an asshole You say you can't live with what you been through Well, ladies you can be an asshole too You might pretend you ain't got one on the bottom of you, But don't fool yerself girl It's lookin' at you Don't fool yerself girl It's winkin' at you Don't fool yerself girl It's blinkin' at you That's why I say I'm gonna ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up yer poop chute Corn hole Ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up yer poop chute Fist fuck Ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up yer poop chute Wrist-watch; Crisco Ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up yer poop chute Pud! Don't fool yerself, girl It's goin' right up yer poop chute Don't fool yerself, girl It's goin' right up yer poop chute (etc., repeats) Aw, I knew you'd be surprised... |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
I don't know much about dancin,
Or why I got this song, One of my legs is shorter than the other and both my feets too long. Course now right along with 'em, I got no natural rhythm, But I go dancin' every night, hopein' one night I might get it right! (Chorus) I'm a Dancin' Fool (Dancin' fool) Dancin' Fool. I'm a Dancin' Fool (Dancin' fool) Dancin' Fool When I hear that beat, I jump outta my seat, When I hear the beat cuz' I'm a, Dancin Fool (Dancin' fool) Dancin' Fool Disco folks all dressed up, Like theys fit to kill, I walk on in, see 'em there, I'm gonna give them all a thrill. When they see me comin', They all steps aside, They has a fit while I commit, My Social Suicide! (Chorus) I'm a Dancin' Fool (Dancin' fool) Dancin' Fool. I'm a Dancin' Fool (Dancin' fool) Dancin' Fool When the beat goes on I'm so wrong. Beat goes on and I'm so wrong. Beat goes on and I'm so wrong. The beat goes on and I'm so wrong, The beat goes on and I'm so wrong, The beat goes on and I'm so wrong, The beat goes on and I'm so wrong! I may be totally wrong but I'm a, Dancin Fool I may be totally wrong but I'm a, Dancin' Fool (Yowza, Yowza, Yowza) I got it all together now, My very own disco flow, hey hey, My shirts half open, to show you my chains, and the spoon fer up my nose. I am really something, Thats what you'd probably say, So smoke your little smoke, Drink your little drink, While I dance the night away! (Chorus) I'm a Dancin' Fool. I'm a Dancin' Fool. I'm a Dancin' Fool. I'm a Dancin' Fool. He's a Dancin' Fool I may be totally wrong but I'm a, (Music) I may be totally wrong but I'm a, (Music) I may be totally wrong but I'm a, (Music) I may be totally wrong but I'm a, FOOL! ya. (hey darlin can I buy ya a couple a drinks???) |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) Flakes! Flakes! Flakes! Flakes! They don't do no good They never be workin' When they oughta should They waste your time They're wastin' mine California's got the most of them Boy, they got a host of them Swear t'God they got the most At every business on the coast Swear t'God they got the most At every business on the coast They got the Flakes Flakes! Flakes! They can't fix yer brakes You ask 'em, "Where's my motor?" "Well, it was eaten by snakes..." You can stab 'n' shoot 'n' spit But they won't be fixin' it They're lyin' an' lazy They can be drivin' you crazy Swear t'God they got the most At every business on the coast Swear t'God they got the most At every business on the coast Take it away, Bob... I asked as nice as I could If my job would Somehow be finished by Friday Well, them whole damn weekend came 'n' went, Frankie Wanna buy some mandies, Bob? 'N' they didn't do nothin' But they charged me double for Sunday You know, no matter what you do, They gonna cheat 'n' rob you Then they'll send you a bill That'll get your senses reelin' And if you do not pay They got computer collectors That'll get you so crazy 'Til your head'll go through th' ceilin' Yes it will! I'm a moron, 'n' this is my wife She's frosting a cake With a paper knife All what we got here's American made It's a little bit cheesey, But it's nicely displayed Well we don't get excited when it Crumbles 'n' breaks We just get on the phone And call up some Flakes They rush on over 'N' wreck it some more 'N' we are so dumb They're linin' up at our door Well, the toilet went crazy Yersterday afternoon The plumber he says Never flush a tampoon! This great information Cost me half a week's pay And the toilet blew up Later on the next day-ay-eee-ay Blew up the next day WOO-OOO We are millions 'n' millions, We're coming to get you We're protected by unions So don't let it upset you Can't escape the conclusion It's probably God's Will That civilization Will grind to a standstill And we are the people Who will make it all happen While yer children is sleepin', Yer puppy is crappin' You might call us Flakes Or something else you might coin us But we know you're so greedy That you'll probably join us We're coming to get you, we're coming to get you We're coming to get you, we're coming to get you We're coming to get you, we're coming to get you We're coming to get you, we're coming to get you... |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
I Have Been In You - From the CD "Sheik Yerbouti"
I have been in you, baby And you have been in me And we have be so intimately entwined And it sure was fine I have been in you, baby And you have been in me And so you see we have be so together I thought that we would never Return from Forever (Return from Forever) (Return from Forever) You have been in me And understandably I have been in 'n' outta you (in 'n' outta you, in 'n' outta you) And everywhere, you want me to (in 'n' outta yoooou) Yes you know it's true; And while (I was inside) I might have been (undignified) And that is maybe (why you cried) I don't know, Maybe so But what's the difference now? I have been in you baby You have been in me Aw' little girl there ain't no time To wash your stinky hand Go head 'n' roll over I'm goin' in you again in you again in you again in you again... I'm going in you again-ahhh In you again, ah! In you again-aah! In you again, ah! In you again-aah! In you again, ah! Now I'm goin' in you again baby 'N' you can go in me too, that's true I'm goin' in you again, baby 'N' later when we get through I'm going in you again-ahh! In you again, ah! In you again-aah! In you again, ah! In you again-aah! In you again, ah! |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) One Two Three Four! Feelin' sorry Feelin' sad So many ugly people I feel bad I'm so cute They're so homely Some of them At home 'n' lonely Wish they could be Very cute like me But they will never Get to be Some folks got it Some folks don't Some so ugly They never won't Everybody See his hair See his clothes I'm sure you care Terry Ted Is really sweet Watch the way he keep the beat Sweet as honey He's a piece of cake >From the ginseng root 'N' stuff he take Vitamin E 'N' all the B's He's so cool he'll make you freeze Make you freeze Make you freeze Excuse me please Step aside I'm gonna ride I'm gonna strut I'm gonna slide Hey, ugly folks, Go get some cyanide An' die DIE DIE DIE DIE A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen A-ren-nen-nen-uh-rennda A-ren-nen-nen-ah-ren-nen-nen A-rennda-rennda-rahhh (etc. repeats) Ugly is bad And bad is wrong And wrong is sinful And sin leads to eternal damnation An' hot burnin' fire Hot burnin' fire Hot burnin' fire Hot burnin' fire Screams of agony Screams of agony Screams of agony Screams of agony Arrrrrrrghhhhhhh! One Two Three Four I'm so cute! I'm so cute! I'm so cute! I'm so cute! (etc. repeats) |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Jewish Princess Lyrics
I want a nasty little Jewish Princess With long phony nails and a hairdo that rinses A horny little Jewish Princess With a garlic aroma that could level Tacoma Lonely inside Well, she can swallow my pride I want a hairy little Jewish Princess With a brand new nose, who knows where it goes I want a steamy little Jewish Princess With over-worked gums, who squeaks when she cums I don't want no troll I just want a Yemenite hole I want a darling little Jewish Princess Who don't know shit about cooking and is arrogant looking A vicious little Jewish Princess To specifically happen with a pee-pee that's snappin' All up inside I just want a Princess to ride Awright, back to the top...everybody twist I want a funky little Jewish Princess A grinder; a bumper, with a pre-moistened dumper A brazen little Jewish Princess With titanic tits, and sand-blasted zits She can even be poor So long as she does it with four on the floor (Vapor-lock) I want a dainty little Jewish Princess With a couple of sisters who can raise a few blisters A fragile little Jewish Princess With Roumanian thighs, who weasels 'n' lies For two or three nights Won't someone send me a Princess who bites Won't someone send me a Princess who bites Won't someone send me a Princess who bites Won't someone send me a Princess who bites |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) My baby's got Jones crushin' love Jones crushin' love Jones crushin' love Well my baby's got Jones crushin' love Jones crushin' love Jones crushin' love She don't merely fit like a glove That little girl's got the jones That little girl's got the jones That little girl's got the jones She's tryin' to Grind up my jones Grind up my jones Grind up my jones Well, she's tryin' to Grind up my jones Grind up my jones Grind up my jones She don't never wanna leave it alone She can push; she can shove Till it's just a nub She can push; she can shove Till it's just a nub Just a nub Just a nub Here she comes With her red dress on Steam shoots out >From the sprinklers on the lawn The eyes be rollin' On the concrete fawn The wind can't blow 'Cause the sky is gone The wind can't blow 'Cause the sky is gone The wind can't blow 'Cause the sky is gone Jones crusher, jones crusher Deadly jaws, better get the gauze She's a jones crusher, jones crusher Deadly jaws, better get the gauze (etc. ad lib) |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) (Instrumental) |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) Yeah, I knew you'd be surprised! |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) Why dontcha take it down the seashore, Bernie? |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) Hey! I'm only fourteen Sickly 'n' thin Tried all of my life Just to grow me a chin It popped out once But my dad pushed it in Why did he hurt me? He's my next of kin... He's a mex-i-kin I'm lonely 'n' green Too small for my shirt If Simmons was here I could feature my hurt Scared of the future Hope I don't grow I know nobody likes me 'Cause everywhere I go They say NO They say NO They say NO Now I'm older Got a place in the town, babe Got a chin on my shoulder 'N' it keeps growing down 'n' down 'n' down I'm horny 'n' lonely 'N' I wish I was dead Why am I livin'? I wanna be dead instead That's right, I said I wanna be dead instead Now dig this: I wanna be dead In bed Please kill me 'Cause that would thrill me I wanna be dead In bed Please kill me 'Cause that would thrill me (etc, repeat) |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) David Ocker (clarinet) Many well-dressed people In several locations Are kissing quite a bit Later in the evening Leaves will fall Tears will flow Wind will blow Some rain; some snow A fireplace maybe A kiss or two And down they'll go But that's the way it goes sometimes You just might find yourself in the clutches of some Wild Love Mama stroked his dinger Daddy got a stinky finger In those days of long ago Later in the evening She'd complain They'd refrain He'd go home and hone his bone A tragic case maybe But also true I'm sure you know But that's the way it goes sometimes You just might find yourself in the clutches of some Wild Love Now'days you get dressed up 'N' later you get messed up But still you're pretty hip Later in the evening You'll explain She'll remain You're real modern She's the same A frantic pace maybe But who's to say Where it will go |
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from Frank Zappa - Sheik Yerbouti (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Adrian Belew (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards, vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion, vocals) Napoleon Murphy Brock (background vocals) Andre Lewis (background vocals) Randy Thornton (background vocals) Davey Moire (background vocals) Maybe you should stay with yo' mama She could do your laundry 'n' cook for you Maybe you should stay with yo' mama You're really kinda stupid 'n' ugly too (verse repeats) You ain't really made for bein' out in the street Ain't much hope for a fool like you 'Cause if you play the game, you will get beat Maybe you should stay with yo' mama She could do your laundry 'n' cook for you Maybe you should stay with yo' mama You're really kinda stupid 'n' ugly too And You should never smoke in pajamas You might start a fire 'n' burn yer face Maybe you'll return to Managua You could go unnoticed in such a place |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Act III
(after the song ends) This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... As you can see, MUSIC can get you pretty fucked up...Take a tip from Joe, do like he did, hock your imaginary guitar and get a good job...Joe did, and he's a happy guy now, on the day shift at the Utility Muffin Research Kitchen, arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully-charged icing anointment utensil. And every time a nice little muffin comes by on the belt, he poots forth... And if this doesn't convince you that MUSIC causes BIG TROUBLE...then maybe I should turn off my plastic' megaphone and sing the last song on the album in my regular voice... SCENE EIGHTEEN A LITTLE GREEN ROSETTA CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER: A little green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta You'll make a muffin betta With a green rosetta A little green rosetta A tiny green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta You'll make a muffin betta Betta It's really getting betta It's betta, it's betta With a green rosetta Green rositti A little green rositti It's really, really meaty A little green rositti Betta, betta, (Hey, really out there...really good) It's really getting betta It's betta, it's betta With a green rosetta Setta, setta (Good God, give the drummer some) Green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta (Setta, setta, setta, etc....) (Make a muffin, make a muffin, make a muffin, Make a muffin betta, make a muffin betta, etc....) With a green rosetta A little green rosetta (Etc....) Good God! You're really jammin ! Now the Reggae version, hey, for the People in the Third World... we haven't forgotten anybody on this song.. .for all of you French people...who think that you re outta sight... And for the people in Spain...who think the French people are where its at... And for the people in Mongolia who always wanted to go to Spain for a vacation... And for those of you in Taiwan who got chumped, this chorus is for you: (Rang Tang Ding Dong, I am the Japanese Sandman... Take eight...) Green rosetta Green rosetta A little green rosetta (Against the Reggae beat, though... No, it's still Reggae, but it s all backwards) A little green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta You'll make a muffin betta (Etc., etc., etc...) Now you see, some places in the Third World it might be difficult to dance to this because the kerosene record player is not a very efficient device.. .And a lot of times they run out of, they run out of spunk right in the middle of the chorus... Causing the song to sound like this... A little green rosetta However we continue in spite of the fact that the fuel may be low on your record player. We suggest that in places like the Fourth World where things are really tough that you keep the record player going by rubbing two sticks together. And if all else fails, throw the record away... build your own green rosetta...try this recipe: Well start with a lump of grass... the grass bone connected to the ankle bone...the knee bone connected to the wishbone...and then everybody moves to New York and goes to a party with Warren. Hey! And we've flown in, at great expense, (triple scale, no less, ladies and gentlemen), Steve Gad's clone to play the out-chorus on this song...he's really outa-site, in spite of the fact that the click track is totally irrelevant to what he's doing now. I'm listening to the click, yes I'm suffering with the click track right now...this guy is totally out of sync with it, but what the fuck. Ed Mann will call him up later, show him the sign. Okay Vinnie, where is five? They're pretty good musicians They re pretty good musicians They're pretty good musicians They're pretty good musicians But it don't make no difference If they're good musicians Because anybody who would buy this record Doesn't give a fuck if there's good musicians on it Because this is a stupid song AND THAT'S THE WAY I LIKE IT A little green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta A little green rosetta You make a muffin betta With a little green rosetta A little green rosetta Rosetta, rosetta, rosetta (etc., etc., etc....) AL MALKIN. Zetta.. |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals) Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals) Ike Willis (lead vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Vinnie Colaiuta (drums) Arriving at L. Ron Hoover's modernistic office / cathedral / warehouse / condominium complex, Joe is greeted by a pre-recorded message and a dramatically illuminated image on a wall-sized TV screen... L. Ron Hoover: Welcome to the First Church of Appliantology! The WHITE ZONE is for loading and unloading only! Don't you be Tarot-fied It's just a token of my extreme Don't you be Tarot-fied It's just a token of my extreme Don't you never try to look behind my eyes You don't wanna know what they have seen Don't you never try to look behind my eyes You don't wanna know what they have seen Joe: (thinking to himself) Some people think That if they go too far They'll never get back To where the rest of them are I might be crazy But there's one thing I know You might be surprised At what you find when ya go! And thus, having rationalized his expedition to L. Ron's modernistic office / cathedral / warehouse / condominium complex, JOE seeks The Answer to his problem... Joe: Oh oh oh Mystical Advisor What is my problem, tell me Can you see? L. Ron Hoover: Well, you have nothing to fear, my son! You are a Latent Appliance Fetishist, It appears to me! Joe: That all seems very, very strange I never craved a toaster Or a color T.V. L. Ron Hoover: A Latent Appliance Fetishist Is a person who refuses to admit to his or herself That sexual gratification can only be achieved Through the use of MACHINES... Get the picture? Joe: Are you telling me I should come out of the closet now Mr. Ron? L. Ron Hoover: No, my son! You must go into THE CLOSET Joe: What? L. Ron Hoover: And you will have Joe: Heh? L. Ron Hoover: Hey! A lot of fun! That's where they all live So if you want an Appliance to love you You'll have to go in there 'N' get you one Joe: Well...that seems simple enough... L. Ron Hoover: Yes, but if you want a really GOOD one, You'll have to learn a foreign language... Joe: German, for instance? L. Ron Hoover: That's right... A lot of really cute ones come from over there! (Fifty bucks, please) And a cheerful group of Appliantologists dance into the room wearing aluminum foil lab smocks, lock arms in a circle around JOE, making sure he pays in full, all the while singing with L. RON as he delivers his final instructions... L. Ron Hoover: If you been Mod-O-fied, It's an illusion, an you're in between Don't you be Tarot-fied, It's just a lot of nothin', So what can it mean? If you been Mod-O-fied, It's an illusion, an yer in between Don't you be Tarot-fied, It's just a lot of nothin', So what can it mean? If you been Mod-O-fied, It's an illusion, an yer in between... JOE leaves the First Church of Appliantology and sets out to try L. RON's expensive advice CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... Joe has just learned to speak German Now, get this, heres why he did it! He's gonna go to this club on the other side of town, it's called THE CLOSET... And they got these Appliances in there that really go for a guy dressed up like a housewife who can speak German (you know what I mean)... so Joe's learned how to speak German, he goes in this place and he sees these little Kitchen Machineries dancing around with each other, and he sees this one...that looks like it's a cross between an industrial vacuum cleaner and a chrome piggy bank with marital aids stuck all over its body... it's really exciting...and when he sees it, he BURSTS INTO SONG... |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Act I
SCENE THREE CATHOLIC GIRLS A festive CYO party with crepe paper streamers, contestants for the broom dance, the "hokey cokey", baked goods, & FATHER RILEY making sure the lights don't go down too low... Father Riley And Various Party Goers: (Well) Catholic Girls With a tiny little mustache Catholic Girls Do you know how they go? Catholic Girls In the Rectory Basement Father Riley's a fairy But it don't bother Mary Catholic Girls At the CYO Catholic Girls Do you know how they go? Catholic Girls There can be no replacement How do they go, after the show? Joe: All the way (That's right, all the way!) That's the way they go Every day (That's right!) And none of their mamas ever seem to know Hip-Hip-Hooray For all the class they show There's nothing like a Catholic Girl At the CYO When they learn to blow . . . Father Riley: They're learning to blow All the Catholic Boys! Mary: Warren Cuccurullo . . . Father Riley: Catholic Boys! Mary: Kinda young, kinda WOW! Father Riley: Catholic Boys! Mary: Vinnie Colaiuta . . . Chorus: Where are they now? Did they all take The Vow? Father Riley: Catholic Girls! Warren: Carmenita Scarfone! Father Riley: Catholic Girls! Officer Butzis: Hey! She gave me VD! Father Riley: Catholic Girls! Warren: Toni Carbone! Chorus: With a tongue like a cow She could make you go WOW! Joe: VD Vowdy vootie Right away That's the way they go Every day Whenever their mamas take them to a show Matinee Pass the popcorn please There's nothing like a Catholic Girl With her hand in the box When she's on her knees Larry: She was on her knees My little Catholic Girl Chorus: In a little white dress Catholic Girls They never confess Catholic Girls I got one for a cousin I love how they go So send me a dozen Catholic Girls OOOOOOH! (Well well now) Catholic Girls (Ma-ma-mum ma-ma-mum) Yai-ee-ahhh! Catholic Girls OOOOOOH! (Well well now) Catholic Girls (Ma-ma-mum ma-ma-ma-ma-mum) Yai-ee-ahhh! Joe had a girl friend named Mary. They would meet each other at the Social Club. Hold hands And think Pure Thoughts But one night, at the Social Club meeting... |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals) Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals) Ike Willis (lead vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Tommy Mars (keyboards) Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Vinnie Colaiuta (drums) Jeff (tenor saxophone) Marginal Chagrin (baritone saxophone) Stumuk (bass saxophone) Dale Bozzio (vocals) Al Malkin (vocals) Craig Steward (harmonica) Central Scrutinizer: But one night, at the Social Club meeting Mary didn't show up . . . She was sucking cock backstage at The Armory In order to get a pass To see some big rock group for free . . . Backstage at the local Armory, Mary, in her little white dress, is wiping the remnants of her performance off the side of her mouth as LARRY (the guy from the garage who quit the band in order to make an honest living) zips up the front of his stinking boiler suit and sings to the same teen-age girls who were stomping and clapping a little while ago, as they kneel with their little pink mouths open near the crew bus, hoping to save the price of admission by performing acts of Hooverism on the jolly lads who set up the P.A. System. Larry: Hey Hey Hey all you girls in these Industrial towns I know you're prob'ly gettin' tired Of all the local clowns They never give you no respect They never treat you nice So perhaps you oughta try A little friendly advice And be a CREW SLUT Hey, you'll love it Be a CREW SLUT It's a way of life Be a CREW SLUT See the world Don't make a fuss, just get on the bus CREW SLUT Add water makes its own sauce Be a CREW SLUT So you don't forget, call before midnite tonite The boys in the crew Are just waiting for you You never to get move around You never go nowhere I know yer prob'ly gettin' tired Of all the guys out there You always wondered what it's like To go from place to place So, darlin', take a little ride On the mixer's face Be a CREW SLUT Just follow the magic footprints Be a CREW SLUT Hey, you'll love it! Be a CREW SLUT It's a way of life I ain't gonna squash it And you don't need to wash it! CREW SLUT Hey, I'll buy you a pizza CREW SLUT Of course I'll introduce you to Warren The boys in the crew Are only waiting for you At this point, the road crew, as all road crews must from time to time, borrow some of the big rock group's equipment and have a blues jam session, indicating to the kneeling maidens that they are endowed with a great deal of raw talent, as well as massive meat. Obviously impressed with LARRY'S ability to suck so hard on his harmonica that screeching little noises come out of it, MARY kneels again and reaches upward in gestures of supplication, listening intently as LARRY continues to sing... Larry: Well you been to Alabama, girl, 'N' Georgia too 'N' all the boys in the crew Is bein' good to you I know yer sayin' to yourself 'This is the way to go' 'Cause when you need a little extra They will give you some mo' 'Cause you're the CREW SLUT Mary: Eh, hah ha, I'm into leather... Larry: That's good! A lot of the boys in the crew Love leather... Mary: And rubber... Larry: Yeh, they like rubber too...shrink-tubing With a hair dryer... Road Crew Chorus: Trade your spot on the bench For a guy with a wrench And be a... Mary: Ha ha ha... Larry: You like that, huh? I told you you'd love it... It's a way of life! Road Crew Chorus: The guys in the crew Have got a present for you! Ren nah naaah Ren nah naaah Ren nah naaah Mary: A present for me? Road Crew Chorus: Ren nah naaah Ren nah naaah Ren nah naaah Larry: Hmmm, we got a present for you! Road Crew Chorus: Ren nah naaah Ren nah naaah Ren nah naaah Mary: Whaddya got? Road Crew Chorus: Ren nah naaah Mary: Whaddya gonna give me? Road Crew Chorus: Ren nah naaah Ren nah naaah Larry: It looks just like a Telefunken U-47 You'll love it... Mary: With Leather? Central Scrutinizer: Eh errr, eh eh...This is,eh, the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER again... And so Mary was enticed away from Joe By an evil barbarian with a wrench in his pocket Lured into a life of SLEAZERY With the entire road crew of some Famous Rock Group (I don't know whether it was really Toad-O or not ...I don't know... I'll check it out) Again we see MUSIC Causing BIG TROUBLE! |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals) Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals) Ike Willis (lead vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Vinnie Colaiuta (drums) Central Scrutinizer: Hello there...this is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... Joe was sent to a special prison where they keep all the other criminals from the music business...you know...the ones who get caught...it's a horrible place, painted all green on the inside, where musicians and former executives take turns snorting detergent and plooking each other... (As the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER chuckles to himself for a moment, FATHER RILEY, who became BUDDY JONES, steps into view in his new identity: FATHER RILEY B. JONES, Prison Chaplain, who, in a rather heavy-handed piece of imagery, is now entrusted with the job of singing this song as he assists the captured executives in their quest for new meat to plook, and, once having found these victims for the princes of the industry, trades them little blobs of sanctified lubricant jelly for cigarettes and candy bars while he holds them down so the execs won't have to work too hard when they stick it in.) ...Anyway, listen, while he's in there he meets this guy who used to be a promo man for a major record company, named Bald-Headed John... King of the Plookers... Father Riley B. Jones: This is the story 'bout Bald-Headed John Former Execs: Dong work for Yuda, Dong, Dong Father Riley B. Jones: He talks a lot 'n' it's usually wrong Former Execs: Dong work for Yuda, Dong, Dong Father Riley B. Jones: He said Dong was Wong, 'N Wong was Kong 'N Dong work for Yuda, 'N John was wrong Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Dong work for Yuda Dong, Dong Sorry John Sorry better Try it again He said Dong was Wong And Wong was Kong And Dong was Gong 'N John was wrong Father Riley B. Jones: John's got a sausage Yeh man John's got a sausage Yeh man John's got a sausage that'll make you fart John's got a sausage that'll break your heart Make you fart And break your heart Don't bend over if you are smart He took a little walk to the weenie stand John's got a sausage Yeh man A great big weenie in both his hands John's got a sausage Yeh man He sucked on the end 'til the mustard squirt He said, "Ya'll stand back 'cause you might get hurt" Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again John's got a sausage Yeh man Sorry John Sorry better Try it again He said Dong was Wong Wong was Kong Kong was Gong 'N John was wrong Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: Make way for the iron shaschige Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: I need a dozen towels so the boys can take a shower Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: Bartender, bring me a colada and milk Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: Well, on second thought, make that a water... HtO Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: Falcum... Take me to the falcum! Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: I wave my bags Did you wave your'n Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: Well how much did they wave? Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: Ah'm almost two kilometers tall Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: This girl must be praketing richcraft Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Bald-Headed John: Don't worry about the faggot I'll take care of the faggot Former Execs: Sorry John Sorry better Try it again Try it again, Try it again Try, try, try again... etc., etc., etc. Bald-Headed John: Your Pomona is very extinct... Yeah, I studied with the Dong of Tokyo 'N also with the oriental Kato... My body contain uh water I just loves the way these Copenhagens talks! Driver, McDoodle... Sausage Salima Salami That looks like that stuff that Freckles lets out Once a mumfth... Eventually FATHER RILEY B. JONES gets around to JOE wrth his little case of pre-blessed unguents... CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... Poor Joe. Hes getting tired of bending over... but we tried to warn him...didn't we? Okay, Joe...you asked for it... here comes The Big One... |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Act I
SCENE FIVE THE WET T-SHIRT CONTEST After a few weeks on the bus, being porked by Toad-O's road crew, and being too exhausted to do their laundry on a regular basis, MARY is dumped in Miami. With no money (and no other famous rock groups due into the area for at least three weeks), she tries to pick up a few bucks by entering the Wet T-Shirt contest at The Brasserie... IKE: Looks to me like something funny Is going on around here People laughin' 'n' dancin' 'n' payin' Entirely too much for their beer And they all think they are Clean outa-site And they're ready to party "Cause the sign outside says it's WET T-SHIRT NITE 'N' they all crave some Hot delight Well the girls are excited Because in a minute They're gonna get wet 'N' the boys are delighted Because all the titties Will get 'em upset 'N' they all think they are Reety-awright 'N' they're ready to boogie 'Cause the sign outside says it's WET T-SHIRT NITE 'N' they all crave some Pink delight When the water gets on'em Their ninnies get rigid 'N' look pretty bold It's a common reaction That makes an attraction Whenever it's cold 'N'all of the fellas They wish they could bite On the cute little nuggets The local girls are showin' off tonite You know I think it serves 'em right You know I think it serves 'em right You know I think it serves 'em right You know I think it serves 'em right And it's WET T-SHIRT TIME AGAIN I know you want someone to show you some tit! BIG ONES! WET ONES! BIG WET ONES! At this point, FATHER RILEY (who had been recently de-frocked for not meeting his quota, and has grown his hair out and bought a groovy sport coat and moved to Miami and changed his name to BUDDY JONES) steps onto the crowded bandstand in his exciting new role as a WET T-SHIRT CONTEST EMCEE... BUDDY JONES: Ah, thanks, IKE... Yes, it's WET T-SHIRT TIME AGAIN Here at The Brasserie... Home of THE TITS... huh huh... And it's the charming Mary from Canoga Park Up next in her bid for the semi-finals... Hi,Mary...howya doin? Having been fucked senseless by the boys in the crew, MARY does not recognize the former religious personage from her nights in the rectory basement during which she acquired her basic manual skills… confounded by his sport coat, she replies... MARY: Hi! Realizing that she no longer recognizes him... or even appreciates the patient religious training he had given her in the past, BUDDY JONES, like a true WET T-SHIRT EMCEE type person, proceeds to say various stupid things to waste time, making the contest itself take longer, thereby giving the mongoloids squatting on the dance floor an opportunity to buy more exciting beverages. . . liquid products that will expand their consciousnesses to the point whereby they might more fully enjoy the ambiance of Miami By Night... BUDDY JONES: Where ya from? MARY: Ah, the bus... BUDDY JONES: Which one? MARY: You know...the last tour... You know... Leather BUDDY JONES: Oh.. .you were the girl that was stuck to seat 38 on Phydeaux III... why don't you get in position now and take a deep breath, because this water is very, very cold, but it's goin' to be so stimulating. And Mary's the kind of Red-Blooded American Girl who'll do anything... MARY: Anything... BUDDY JONES: I said anything... for fifty bucks That's right! MARY: I really need the fifty bucks you know I gotta get home! BUDDY JONES: Yeh, I know, your father is waiting for you in the tool shed... that's right,you heard right... our big prize tonight is fifty American Dollars to the girl with the most exciting mammalian protruberances... MARY: Here I am! BUDDY JONES: ... as viewed through a thoroughly soaked, stupid looking white sort of male person's conservative kind of middle-of-the-road COTTON UNDER-GARMENT! Whoopee! And here comes THE WATER! MARY: EEEK! BUDDY JONES: No, you'd squeak more if the water got on you ...sounds like you just got an ice pick in the forehead... AND HERE COMES THE ICE PICK IN THE FOREHEAD... a million laughs, Mary! Anyway; good golly, what a mess...she's totally soaked.. totally committed to the fifty bucks.. .That's it just step into the spotlight.. let the guys get a good look at ya honey! MARY: Here I am! BUDDY JONES: Whaddya say, fellas? Nice setta jugs? Now Mary, how's about shakin' it around a little... BUDDY JONES: Oh my goodness, look at her go! MARY: Oooh! I'm dancing! I'm dancing! BUDDY JONES: Ain't this what living is really all about! Here's your fifty bucks, Mary... MARY: Oh great! Now I can go home! BUDDY JONES: Home is where the heart is. MARY: On the bus. |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals) Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals) Ike Willis (lead vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Vinnie Colaiuta (drums) Joe: (to himself as he walks out of prison) I'm out at last Boy, the world sure looks different Wow...there's hardly anything fun to do Since they made music illegal But I'm hooked I got the habit I've got to have it I need to play But there's no musicians anymore They're all gone Wait! I've got it! I'll be sullen and withdrawn I'll dwindle off into the twilight realm Of my own secret thoughts I'll walk through the parking lot In a semi- catatonic state And dream of guitar notes To go with the loading-zone announcements. JOE wanders through the world which by then has been totally epoxied over, carefully organized, with everyone reporting daily to his or her appointed place in a line somewhere in front of a window somewhere in a building somewhere in order to collect his or her welfare check, which, when cashed, made it possible for the young ones to continue the payments for the obsolete and irreparable appliances their parents had purchased on the instalment plan years ago, providing as security the future incomes of their children. The rest of these checks were used by the young recipients to buy fun things of their own on credit, most of which broke down or failed within moments of purchase and seemed to be stacking up everywhere. Central Scrutinizer: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER The White Zone is for loading and unloading only. If you have to load or unload, go to the White Zone. You'll love it. It's a way of life. This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER The White Zone is for loading and unloading only. If you have to load or unload, go to the White Zone. You'll love it. It's a way of life. This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER The White Zone is for loading and unloading only. If you have to load or unload... As JOE stumbles over mounds of dead consumer goods formed into abstract statues dedicated to the Quality of American Craftsmanship, dreaming his stupid little guitar notes, he hears, somewhere in the back of his head, the voice of MRS. BORG, taunting him: Mrs. Borg's Voice: Turn it down! Turn it down! I have children sleeping here! Don't you boys know any nice songs? I'm calling the police! I did it! They'll be here... shortly! I'm not joking around anymore! You'll see now! There they are... they're coming! Listen to that mess, would you! Every day this goes on around here! He used to cut my grass... He was a very nice boy... He used to cut my grass... He was a very nice boy... He used to cut my grass... He was a very nice boy... He used to cut my grass... He was a very nice boy... Central Scrutinizer: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... Yes...he used to be a nice boy...He used to cut the grass...But now his mind is totally destroyed by music. He's so crazy now he even believes that people are writing articles and reviews about his imaginary guitar notes, and so, continuing to dwindle in the twilight realm of his own secret thoughts, he not only dreams imaginary guitar notes, but, to make matters worse, dreams imaginary vocal parts to a song about the imaginary journalistic profession... |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Act I
SCENE TWO JOE'S GARAGE A boring old garage in a residential area with a teenage band rehearsing in it. JOE (the main character in the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER'S Special Presentation) sings to us of the trials and tribulations of garage- band husbandry. CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER: We take you now to a garage in Canoga Park. JOE: It wasn't very large There was just enough room to cram the drums In the corner over by the Dodge It was a fifty-four With a mashed up door And a cheesy little amp With a sign on the front said "Fender Champ" And a second-hand guitar It was a Stratocaster with a whammy bar At this point, LARRY (a guy who will eventually give up music and earn a respectable living as a roadie for a group called Toad-O) joins in the song... LARRY: We could jam in Joe's Garage His mama was screamin' His dad was mad We was playin' the same old song In the afternoon 'n' sometimes we would Play it all night long It was all we knew, 'n' easy too So we wouldn't get it wrong All we did was bend the string like... Hey! Down in Joe's Garage We didn't have no dope or LSD But a coupla quartsa beer Would fix it so the intonation Would not offend yer ear And the same old chords goin' over 'n' over Became a symphony We would play it again 'n' again 'n' again 'Cause it sounded good to me ONE MORE TIME! We could jam in Joe's Garage His mama was screamin', "TURN IT DOWN!" We was playin' the same old song In the afternoon 'n' sometimes we would Play it all night long It was all we knew, and easy too So we wouldn't get it wrong Even if you played it on a saxophone We thought we was pretty good We talked about keepin' the band together 'N' we figured that we should 'Cause about this time we was gettin' the eye From the girls in the neighborhood They'd all come over 'n' dance around like... Twenty teen-age girls dash in and go STOMP-CLAP, STOMP-CLAP-CLAP... So we picked out a stupid name Had some cards printed up for a coupla bucks 'N' we was on our way to fame Got matching suits 'N' Beatle Boots 'N' a sign on the back of the car 'N' we was ready to work in a GO-GO Bar ONE TWO THREE FOUR LET'S SEE IF YOU GOT SOME MORE! People seemed to like our song They got up 'n' danced 'n made a lotta noise An' it wasn't 'fore very long A guy from a company we can't name Said we oughta take his pen 'N' sign on the line for a real good time But he didn't tell us when These "good times" would be somethin' That was really happenin' So the band broke up An' it looks like We will never play again... JOE: Guess you only get one chance in life To play a song that goes like... And, as the band plays their little song, MRS. BORG (who keeps her son, SY, in the closet with the vacuum cleaner) screams out the window... MRS. BORG: Turn it down! Turn it DOWN! I have children sleeping here... Don't you boys know any nice songs? JOE: (Speculating on the future) Well the years was rollin' by Heavy Metal 'n Glitter Rock Had caught the public eye Snotty boys with lipstick on Was really flyin' high 'N' then they got that Disco thing 'N' New Wave came along 'N' all of a sudden I thought the time Had come for that old song We used to play in "Joe's Garage" And if I am not wrong You will soon be dancin' to... CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER: The WHITE ZONE is for loading and unloading only. If you gotta load or unload, go to the WHITE ZONE. You'll love it... JOE: Well the years was rollin' by (etc.)... MRS. BORG: I'm calling THE POLICE! There! I did it! They'll be here...shortly! OFFICER BUTZIS: This is the police... MRS. BORG: I'm not joking around anymore OFFICER BUTZIS: We have the garage surrounded If you give yourself up We will not harm you Or hurt you neither MRS. BORG: You'll see them OFFICER BUTZIS: This is the police MRS. BORG: There they are, they're coming! OFFICER BUTZIS: Give yourself up We will not harm you MRS. BORG: Listen to that mess, would you? OFFICER BUTZIS: This is the police Give yourself up We have the garage surrounded MRS. BORG: Everday this goes on around here! OFFICER BUTZIS: We will not harm you, or maim you (swat team 4, move in!) MRS. BORG: He used to cut my grass... He was a very nice boy... CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... That was Joe's first confrontation with The Law. Naturally, we were easy on him. One of our friendly counselors gave him A do-nut... and told him to Stick closer to church-oriented social activities. |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals) Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals) Ike Willis (lead vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Tommy Mars (keyboards) Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Vinnie Colaiuta (drums) Jeff (tenor saxophone) Marginal Chagrin (baritone saxophone) Stumuk (bass saxophone) Dale Bozzio (vocals) Al Malkin (vocals) Craig Steward (harmonica) JOE is so disoriented by his disease, he goes in the other room and plays the title cut from an old Jeff Simmons album, and sings along with it. Joe: Lucille Has messed my mind up But I still love her Oh I still love her Lucille Has messed my mind up But I still love her Oh I still love her Lucille Has messed my mind up But I still need her You know I need her Whatcha tryna doota me Lucille? Whatcha tryna doota me Lucille? Whatcha tryna doota me Lucille? You got me goin' outa my mind Lucille Has tore my heart up But I still love her I really love her Lucille Has tore my heart up But I still need her You know I need her She treats me like my heart Is made of stone She runs around And leaves me home All alone She doesn't answer When I call her on the phone She messed up my mind I'm crying alla the time Lucille Has messed my mind up But I still love her I really love her Lucille Has tore my heart up But I still need her I really need her Lucille My mind up I love her I really love her Lucille My heart up But I still love her I really love her Lucille My mind up I love her I really love her Lucille My heart up I really need her I really really need her Lucille My mind up I really love her I really really love her Lucille My heart up I really love her I really love her Lucille My mind up But I still love her I really really love her Lucille My mind up I really need her I really really need her Lucille Has tore my heart up I really love her I really really love her Lucille My mind up I really love her I really love her |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Act I
SCENE SIX Toad-O Line Whereupon the house combo at the Brasserie drifts into a modified version of one of Toad-O's big hit numbers. BUDDY JONES stares longingly at the little nozzles pooching out of MARY'S moistened upper clothing, but it's too late...WARREN, one of the other guys from Joe's Garage Band has already recognized her (he's now one of the foremost disco-fusion rhythm guitar players on the WetT-Shirt Circuit, currently providing exciting strummery here in Miami), and is in the process of getting the details of her life on the bus with LARRY and the other jolly road crew lads. He eventually sends JOE a letter with this information in it... CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... Meanwhile, Joe hears about Mary's naughty exploits. He falls in with a fast crowd and gets seduced by a girl who works at the Jack-In-The-Box, named Lucille, who gives him an unpronounceable disease... |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar)
Ike Willis (guitar, vocals) Ray White (guitar, vocals) Bobby Martin (keyboards, saxophone, vocals) Alan Zavod (keyboards) Scott Thunes (bass) Chad Wackerman (drums) Act II SCENE FOURTEEN OUTSIDE NOW JOE: (somewhat exhausted) These executives have plooked the fuck out of me And there's still a long time to go before I've Paid my debt to society And all I ever really wanted to do was Play the guitar 'n bend the string like Reent-toont-teent-toont-teenooneenoonee I've got it I'll be sullen and withdrawn I'll dwindle off into the twilight realm Of my own secret thoughts I'll lay on my back here 'til dawn In a semi-catatonic state And dream of guitar notes That would irritate An executive kinda guy... And sure enough JOE dreams up a few of those guitar notes that every executive despises...those low ones...every exec knows it's only the records with the high squeally ones that get to be hits (except for Duane Eddy)... Well, I guess that one did the trick If they only coulda heard it Half-a-dozen of em woulda strangled While they was suckin on each others' dick But that was just a bunch of imaginary Notes I played Just a little extra somethin' To keep me goin from day to day That's okay I'll be gettin outta here pretty soon Then I won't have to live In this ugly fuckin room Can't wait to see I can't wait to see what it's like On the outside now . . . Can't wait to see I can't wait to see what it's like On the outside now . . . Can't wait to see I can't wait to see what it's like On the outside now . . . Can't wait to see I can't wait to see what it's like On the outside now . . . Can't wait to see I can't wait to see what it's like On the outside now . . . Can't wait to see I can't wait to see what it's like On the outside now . . . Can't wait to see I can't wait to see what it's like On the outside now . . . Can't wait to see I can't wait to see what it's like On the outside now . . . Can't wait to see I can't wait to see what it's like On the outside now . . . Outside now . . . And JOE just lays there, dreaming imaginary guitar notes for years on end, until finally they let him out... |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals) Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals) Ike Willis (lead vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Vinnie Colaiuta (drums) Joe: (clutching the hood ornament of an ancient car) Maybe you thought I was the Packard Goose Or the Ronald MacDonald of the nouveau-abstruse Well fuck all them people, I don't need no excuse For being what I am Do you hear me, then? All them rock 'n roll writers is the worst kind of sleaze Selling punk like some new kind of English disease Is that the wave of the future? Aw, spare me please! Oh no, you gotta go Who do you write for? I wanna know I believe you is the government's whore And keeping peoples dumb is where you're coming from And keeping peoples dumb is where you're coming from Fuck all them writers with the pen in their hand I will be more specific so they might understand They can all kiss my ass But because it's so grand They'd best just stay away Hey, hey, hey Hey, Joe, who did you blow? Moe pushed the button boy And you went to the show Better suck a little harder or the shekels won't flow And I don't mean your thumb So on your knees you bum Just tell yourself it's yum And suck it 'till you're numb Journalism's kinda scary And of it we should be wary Wonder what became of Mary? And no sooner has he wondered, a vision of Mary appears to him, delivering a little lecture... Voice Of Mary's Vision: Hi! It's me... the girl from the bus... Remember? The last tour? Well... Information is not knowledge Knowledge is not wisdom Wisdom is not truth Truth is not beauty Beauty is not love Love is not music Music is THE BEST... Wisdom is the domain of the Wis (which is extinct). Beauty is a French phonetic corruption Of a short cloth neck ornament Currently in resurgence... And no sooner has she spoken (which is awkward and probably incorrect but what the fuck), enormous flabby short cloth neck ornaments obscure the horizon in a multitude, beating their ugly wings and working their hidden chrome snap attachments as they resurge in the direction of the White Zone seeking snack material near the Utensil Shrines of Greater America... Joe: If you're in the audience and like what we do Well, we want you to know that we like you all too But as for the sucker who will write the review If his mind is prehensile (His mind is prehensile) He'll put down his pencil (He'll put down his pencil) And have himself a squat On the Cosmic Utensil (Cosmic Utensil) Go give it all you got On the Cosmic Utensil (Cosmic Utensil) Sit 'n spin until you rot On the Cosmic Utensil (Cosmic Utensil) He really needs to squat On the Cosmic Utensil (Cosmic Utensil Cosmic Utensil) Now that I got that over with I'll just play my imaginary guitar again Hey... soundin' pretty good! Hey...get down, me... Boy, what an imagination! Love myself better than I love myself... I think... What tone! Sounds like an Elegant Gypsy! What is that? Musk? It's hip! |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals) Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals) Ike Willis (lead vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Vinnie Colaiuta (drums) Joe: Fick mich, du miserabler hurensohn Du miserabler hurensohn Fick mich, du miserabler hurensohn Streck ihn aus Streck aus deinem heißen gelockten Streck ihn aus Streck aus deinem heißen gelockten Streck ihn aus Streck aus deinem heißen gelockten schwanz Ah-ee-ahee-ahhhhh! Mach es sehr schnell Rein und raus Magisches Schwein Mach es sehr schnell Rein und raus Magisches Schwein Bis es spritzt, spritzt, spritzt, spritzt Feuer! Bis es spritzt, spritzt, spritzt, spritzt Feuer! Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa! Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa! Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa! Aber beklecker nicht das Sofa, Sofa! Stunned by JOE's command of it's native tongue, a gleaming model XQJ-37 nuclear powered Pan-Sexual Roto-Plooker named SY BORG (previously thought to be the son of the lady who called the Police on cut two, side I), spindles over to JOE and says... Sy Borg: Pick me...I'm clean... I am also programmed for conversational English. This stuns JOE, who stands there speechless for a moment. Smitten by JOE's animal magnetism, SY continues... Sy Borg: May I have this dance? And JOE, looking sharp in his housewife costume with the napkin on his head and the yellow chiffon apron, responds boldly by repeat- ing the entreaty originally delivered in Deutsch in its conversational English form, so that his intentions re- garding the Appliance will be made perfectly clear... Joe: I've got a better idea... Fuck me, you ugly son of a bitch You ugly son of a bitch Fuck me, you ugly son of a bitch Stick it out Stick out yer hot curly weenie Stick it out Stick out yer hot curly weenie Stick it out Stick out yer hot curly weenie Weenie...weenie, weenie, weenie! Make it go fast In and out, (In and out) Magical Pig Make it go fast In and out, (In and out) Magical Pig Till it squirts, squirts, squirts, squirts Fire Till it squirts, squirts, squirts, squirts Fire Don't get no jizz upon that sofa, sofa Don't get no jizz upon that sofa, sofa Don't get no jizz upon that sofa, sofa Don't get no jizz upon that sofa, sofa Whereupon, in order to prove to JOE that he is no ordinary Appliance, SY quotes a few lines of traditional American Love Poetry... Sy Borg: What's a girl like you Doing in a place like this? Do you come here often? Wait a minute... I've got it... You're an Italian... What? You're Jewish? Love your nails... You must be a Libra... Your place or mine? Your place or mine? Your place or mine? Your place or mine? See the chrome Feel the chrome Touch the chrome Heal the chrome See the screaming Hot black steaming Iridescent naugahyde python screaming Steam Roller! CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER. Joe and his date an going back to the apartment to have a little party... |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals) Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals) Ike Willis (lead vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Vinnie Colaiuta (drums) Central Scrutinizer: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... Joe and his date are going back to the apartment to have a little party... Joe: Sy Borg Gimme dat, gimme dat Sy Borg Gimme dat, give me de chromium leg, I beg Sy Borg Gimme dat, gimme dat Sy Borg Gimme dat, give me de chromium leg, Little wires, pliers, tires They turn me on Maybe I'm crazy Maybe I'm crazy Maybe I'm crazy, mon... Stroking several of SY's gleaming appendages, JOE continues... Gee, Sy This is a real groovy apartment You've got here Sy Borg: All government sponsored recreational services are clean and efficient Joe: This is exciting I never plooked A tiny chrome-plated machine That looks like a magical pig With marital aids stuck all over it Such as yourself before Sy Borg: You'll love it! It's a way of life. Joe: Does that mean maybe later You'll plook me... Sy Borg: If you wish, we may have a groovy orgy Joe: Just me and you? Sy Borg: I share this apartment With a modified Gay Bob doll He goes all the way... Ever try oral sex with a miniature rubberized homo-replica? Joe: No, ah, not yet, Ah, is this him? Sy Borg: This is him. Your wish is his command He likes you He wants to kiss you always Just tell him what you want Joe: Really? Hi, little guy Think I might get a tiny, but exciting Blow...job... Gimme dat, gimme dat Blow job... Gimme dat, give me de chromium cob. Sy Borg: Bend over. Joe: Gay Bob Blow job Gimme dat, gimme dat Blow job Gimme dat, give me de chromium cob Sy Borg: You'll love it! It looks just like a TeleFunken U-47. Joe: Little leather cap and trousers They look so gay.. Warren just bought some Warren just bought some Warren just bought some Hey... Sy Borg: Bob is tired. Plook me now, You savage rascal Ehhh! That tickles. You are a fun person I like you. I want to kiss you always. Joe: Gee, this is great How's about some bondage and humiliation Sy Borg: Anything you say, master. Joe: Oh no, I don't believe it You're way more fun than Mary... Sy Borg: You're plooking too hard... Joe: And cleaner than Lucille... Sy Borg: Plooking on me... Joe: What have I been missing All these years? Sy Borg: Too hard Joe: Sy... Sy Borg: Too hard Joe: Sy... Sy Borg: Plooking too hard on me-e-e-e-e... Joe: Speak to me Oh no... The golden shower must have shorted out His master circuit He's, he's, oh my God I must have plooked him... Hey To death... Hey Central Scrutinizer: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER... You have just destroyed one model XQJ-37 Nuclear Powered Pan- Sexual Roto-Plooker And you're gonna have to pay for it! So give up, you haven't got a chance. Joe: But I... I, I, I, I, I... I can't pay I gave all my money To some kinda groovy religious guy... Two songs ago... Central Scrutinizer: Come on out son... Between the two of us We'll find a way to Work it out |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals) Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals) Ike Willis (lead vocals) Peter Wolf (keyboards) Tommy Mars (keyboards) Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Vinnie Colaiuta (drums) Jeff (tenor saxophone) Marginal Chagrin (baritone saxophone) Stumuk (bass saxophone) Dale Bozzio (vocals) Al Malkin (vocals) Craig Steward (harmonica) Sometimes when you're not looking he just sneaks up on you. He looks like a cheap sort of flying saucer about five feet across with a snout-like megaphone apparatus in the front with two big eyes mounted like Appletons with miniature motorized frowning chrome eyebrows over them. Along the side of his disc-like body are several sets of stupid-looking headers and exhaust hoses which apparently propel him and punctuate his dialogue with horrible smelling smoke rings. In the middle of his head we can see an airport wind sock and constantly twirling anemometer. The bottom of him has a landing light and three spoked wheels. In spite of all this, it is obvious that the way he really gets around is by being dangled from place to place by a union guy with a dark green shirt up in the roof who is eating a sandwich (pieces of which drop off every once in a while and lodge themselves near the hole where they put the oil in that makes the cheap smoke). He hovers into view and speaks to us thusly... Central Scrutinizer: This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER...it is my responsibility to enforce all the laws that haven't been passed yet. It is also my responsibility to alert each and every one of you to the potential consequences of various ordinary everyday activities you might be performing which could eventually lead to *The Death Penalty* (or affect your parents' credit rating). Our criminal institutions are full of little creeps like you who do wrong things...and many of them were driven to these crimes by a horrible force called MUSIC! Our studies have shown that this horrible force is so dangerous to society at large that laws are being drawn up at this very moment to stop it forever! Cruel and inhuman punishments are being carefully described in tiny paragraphs so they won't conflict with the Constitution (which, itself, is being modified in order to accommodate THE FUTURE). I bring you now a special presentation to show what can happen to you if you choose a career in MUSIC...The WHITE ZONE is for loading and unloading only...if you have to load or unload, go to the WHITE ZONE... you'll love it...it's a way of life...Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha...Hi, it's me, I'm back. This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER...The WHITE ZONE is for loading and unloading only...If yah gotta load, or if yah gotta unload, go to the WHITE ZONE. You'll love it...it's a way of life. That's right, you'll love it, it's a way of life, that's right, you'll love it, it's a way of life, you'll love it. This, is, the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER! |
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Joe`S Garage Acts 1, 2 & 3 (2006)
Act I
SCENE SEVEN WHY DOES IT HURT WHEN I PEE? Shortly after his liaison with the taco stand lady, joe makes a horrible discovery... Joe: Why does it hurt when i pee? Why does it hurt when i pee? I don't want no doctor To stick no needle in me Why does it hurt when i pee? I got it from the toilet seat I got it from the toilet seat It jumped right up 'n' grabbed my meat Got it from the toilet seat ARRGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!OOOOO!! My balls feel like a pair of maracas (Rattle) My balls feel like a pair of maracas Oh god i probably got the Gon-o-ka-ka-khackus! My balls feel like a pair of maracas Ai-eee-ai-eee-ahhhh! Why does it Why does it Why does it Why does it hurt...when I Peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee? |
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from Frank Zappa - Ship Arriving Too Late To Save A Drowning Witch (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Steve Vai (guitar) Ray White (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards) Bobby Martin (keyboards, saxophone, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Chad Wackerman (drums) Roy Estrada (vocals) Ike Willis (vocals) Bob Harris (vocals) Scott Thunes (bass) There's a ship arriving too late To save a drowning witch She was swimmin' along Tryin' to keep a date With a Merchant Marine Who told her he was really rich But it doesn't matter no more... She's on the ocean floor 'N the water's all green down there 'N it's not very clean down there 'N water snakes 'N rusty wrecks Is all that she can see As the light goes dim And she's tryin' to swim Will she make it? (Boy, we sure hope so...) Not even a witch oughta be caught On the bottom of America's spew-infested Waterways, hey-hey... She could get radiation all over her She could mutate insanely... She could mutate insanely... (that's right) You know she could go on the freeway and grow up to be 15 feet tall and scary-lookin' And then... Cars could crash all over the place As a result of people with Hawaiian shirts on... Lookin' up to see her face Sardines in her eyebrows... Lobsters up 'n down her forehead All of them HORRIBLY LARGE FROM RADIATION... And smelling very bad And DANGEROUS! Maybe a submarine could save her, And bring her home to the Navy... For some kind of ritual sacrifice... |
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from Frank Zappa - Ship Arriving Too Late To Save A Drowning Witch (2006) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - Ship Arriving Too Late To Save A Drowning Witch (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Steve Vai (guitar) Ray White (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards) Bobby Martin (keyboards, saxophone, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Chad Wackerman (drums) Roy Estrada (vocals) Ike Willis (vocals) Bob Harris (vocals) Patrick O'Hearn (bass) I come from nowhere And you should go there Just try it for a while The people from nowhere Always smile Their eyes are all frozen over The sides of their faces pooch out at the corners Because that's what happens when their mouths turn up On both sides Which is why we can tell they're smiling They never frown They never let their eyebrows turn down They like going around with their teeth showing All the time They are from nowhere Your teeth are showing So maybe you been there You could have the disease of nowhere people Where the air gets stuck all over their gums When their nowhere lips roll back For real excitement They stand still They shut up Then they don't do nothing Out there in nowhere |
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from Frank Zappa - Ship Arriving Too Late To Save A Drowning Witch (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Steve Vai (guitar) Ray White (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards) Bobby Martin (keyboards, saxophone, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Chad Wackerman (drums) Roy Estrada (vocals) Ike Willis (vocals) Bob Harris (vocals) Arthur Barrow (bass) No not now No not now No not now No not now Maybe later Maybe later She say I'm free She say I'm free She say I'm free She say I'm free But I like her sister But I like her sister She can't decide Whom she wanna ride She can't decide Whom she wanna ride Tonight - tonight - tonight She changed her mind She changed her mind She changed her mind She changed her mind And I don't blame her And I don't blame her No not now (No no not now) No not now (No no not now) No not now (No no not now) No not now (No no not now) Maybe later Maybe later (Shut up! You need a vacation, boy!) The big ol' hat (The big ol' hat) The cowboy pants (Those cowboy pants) Transcontinental (It's a transcontinental) Hobby horse (A hobby hobby horse) String beans to Utah (That's right) String beans to Utah Tonight Ah, the wife (Ah, the wife) Oh, the waitress (And the waitress too) Oh, the drive (Yes, yes the drive) All night long (All night long) String beans to Utah (Yum yum) String beans to Utah Deliver string beans To Utah tonight (Giddyup) I better go fast Or they won't be all right (All right) Deliver string beans To Utah tonight (Yum yum) Donny 'n Marie Can both take a bite (Bite it Marie) Hawaiian - Hawaiian - Hawaiian Lunch (Hawaiian lunch!) Boog, boog 'em Dano...Murder One! No not now (No no not now) No not now (No no no no not now) No not now (No no not now) No not now (No no no no not now) Maybe later Maybe later She changed her mind (She changed her mind) She changed her mind (You know she changed her mind) She changed her mind (She changed her mind) She changed her mind (You know she changed her mind) And I don't blame her And I don't blame her She's sorta wild (She wild, she wild) She's sorta wild (Really wild, really wild) She's sorta wild (She wild, she wild) A crazy child (Crazy child, crazy child) Tonight - tonight - tonight There she goes (There she goes) Up and down (Up and down) Ride that bull (She's ridin' the bull) All around (All around) The best in town (She's the best in town) Oh she goes (She go up, she go down) Up and down (I said up and down) Oh the bull (The whole bull) The whole bull (The whole bull) The whole bull (The whole damn thing) The best in town (Where she go? Ebzen Sauce...) |
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from Frank Zappa - Ship Arriving Too Late To Save A Drowning Witch (2006)
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Steve Vai (guitar) Ray White (rhythm guitar, vocals) Tommy Mars (keyboards) Bobby Martin (keyboards, saxophone, vocals) Ed Mann (percussion) Chad Wackerman (drums) Roy Estrada (vocals) Ike Willis (vocals) Bob Harris (vocals) Lisa Popeil (vocals) Scott Thunes (bass) She's only seventeen She's really sort of cute She's working in the street She's a teen-age prostitute She ran away from home Her mom was destitute Her daddy doesn't care She's a teen-age prostitute "I have got a pimp He treats me like a dog..." (All the stuff she's shooting Keeps her in a fog) "I would really like to try and get away..." (But if she gets caught he'll cause her some dismay) Tiny little pants Chain around my boot Shakin' in the dark I'm a teen-age prostitute |
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from Frank Zappa - Ship Arriving Too Late To Save A Drowning Witch (2006)
Valley Girl
She's a Valley Girl Valley Girl She's a Valley Girl Okay, fine Fer sure, fer sure She's a Valley Girl In a clothing store Okay, fine... Fer sure, fer sure She's a Valley Girl In a clothing store Like, OH MY GOD! (Valley Girl) Like - TOTALLY (Valley Girl) Encino is like SO BITCHEN (Valley Girl) There's like the Galleria (Valley Girl) And like all these like really great shoe stores I love going into like clothing stores and stuff I like buy the neatest mini-skirts and stuff It s like so BITCHEN cuz like everybody's like Super-super nice It's like so BITCHEN On Ventura, there she goes She just bought some bitchen clothes Tosses her head 'n flips her hair She got a whole bunch of nothin in there Anyway, he goes are you into S and M? I go, oh RIGHT . Could you like just picture me in like a LEATHER TEDDY Yeah right, HURT ME, HURT ME... I'm sure! NO WAY! He was like freaklng me out... He called me a BEASTIE... That's cuz like he was totally BLITZED He goes like BAG YOUR FACE! I'm sure! Valley Girl She's a Valley Girl Valley Girl She's a Valley Girl Okay, fine... Fer sure, fer sure She's a Valley Girl So sweet 'n pure Okay, fine Fer sure, fer sure She's a Valley Girl So sweet 'n pure It's really sad (Valley Girl) Like my English teacher He's like (Valley Girl) He's like Mr. BU-FU (Valley Girl) We're talking Lord God King BU-FU (Valley Girl) I am SO SURE He's like so GROSS He like sits there and like plays with all his rings And he like flirts with all the guys in the class It's like totally disgusting I'm like so sure It's like BARF ME OUT... Gag me with a spoon! Last idea to cross her mind Had something to do with where to find A pair of jeans to fit her butt And where to get her toenails cut So like I go into this like salon place, y'know And I wanted like to get my toenails done And the lady like goes, oh my God, your toenails Are like so GRODY It was like really embarassing She's like OH MY GOD, like BAG THOSE TOENAILS I'm like sure... She goes, uh, I don't know if I can handle this, y'know... I was like really embarassed.. . Valley Girl She's a Valley Girl Valley Girl She's a Valley Girl Okay, fine Fer sure, fer sure She's a Valley Girl And there is no cure Okay, fine Fer sure, fer sure She's a Valley Girl And there is no cure Like my mother is like a total space cadet (Valley Girl) She like makes me do the dishes and (Valley Girl) CLEAN the cat box (Valley Girl) I am sure That's like GROSS (Valley Girl) BARF OUT! (Valley Girl) OH MY GOD (Valley Girl Hi! Uh-huh (Valley Girl) My name? My name is Ondrya Wolfson (Valley Girl) Uh -huh That's right, Ondrya (Valley Girl) Uh -huh... I know (Valley Girl) It's like... I do not talk funny... I'm sure (Valley Girl) Whatsa matter with the way I talk? (Valley Girl) I am a VAL, I know But I live in like in a really good part of Encino so it's okay (Valley Girl) So like, I don't know I'm like freaking out totally Oh my God! Hi - I have to go to the orthodontist I'm getting my braces off, y'know But I have to wear a retainer That's going to be really like a total bummer I'm freaking out I'm SURE Like those things that like stick in your mouth They're so gross... You like get saliva all over them But like, I don't know, it's going to be cool, y'know So you can see my smile It'll be like really cool Except my like my teeth are like too small But NO BIGGIE... It's so AWESOME It's like TUBULAR, y'know Well, I'm not like really ugly or anything It's just like I don't know You know me, I'm like into like the clean stuff Like PAC-MAN and like, I don't know Like my mother like makes me do the dishes It's like so GROSS. . . Like all the stuff like sticks to the plates And its like, it's like somebody elses food, y'know It's like GRODY... GRODY TO THE MAX I'm sure It's like really nauseating Like BARF OUT GAG ME WITH A SPOON GROSS I am SURE TOTALLY... |
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from Ran Blake, David Fabris - Indian Winter (2005) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - The Mothers Of Invention/ Uncle Meat (2005) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - The Mothers Of Invention/ Uncle Meat (2005) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - The Mothers Of Invention/ Uncle Meat (2005) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - The Mothers Of Invention/ Uncle Meat (2005) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - The Mothers Of Invention/ Uncle Meat (2005) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - The Mothers Of Invention/ Uncle Meat (2005) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - The Mothers Of Invention/ Uncle Meat (2005) | |||||
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from Frank Zappa - The Mothers Of Invention/ Uncle Meat (2005) |