Ani Difranco

coming of age during the plague
of reagan and bush
watching capitalism gun down democracy
it had this funny effect on me
I guess

I am cancer
I am HIV
and I am down at the blue jesus
blue cross hospital
just lookin' up from my pillow
feeling blessed

and the mighty multinationals
have monopolized the oxygen
so it's as easy as breathing
for us all to participate

yes they're buying and selling
off shares of air
and you know it's all around you
but it's hard to point and say "there"
so you just sit on your hands
and quietly contemplate

your next bold move
the next thing you're gonna have to prove
to yourself

what a waste of thumbs that are opposable
to make machines that are disposable
and sell them to seagulls flying in circles
around one big right wing

yes, the left wing was broken long ago
by the slingshot of cointelpro
and now it's so hard to have faith in
anything

especially your next bold move
or the next thing you're gonna need to prove
to yourself

you want to track each trickle
back to its source
and then scream up the faucet
'til your face is hoarse
cuz you're surrounded by a world's worth
of things you just can't excuse

but you've got the hard cough of a chain smoker
and you're at the arctic circle playing strip poker
and it's getting colder and colder
everytime you lose

so go ahead
make your next bold move
tell us
what's the next thing you're gonna have to prove
to yourself

coming of age during the plague
of reagan and bush
watching capitalism gun down democracy
it had this funny effect on me
I guess

I am cancer
I am HIV
and I am down at the blue jesus
blue cross hospital
just lookin' up from my pillow
feeling blessed

and the mighty multinationals
have monopolized the oxygen
so it's as easy as breathing
for us all to participate

yes they're buying and selling
off shares of air
and you know it's all around you
but it's hard to point and say "there"
so you just sit on your hands
and quietly contemplate

your next bold move
the next thing you're gonna have to prove
to yourself

what a waste of thumbs that are opposable
to make machines that are disposable
and sell them to seagulls flying in circles
around one big right wing

yes, the left wing was broken long ago
by the slingshot of cointelpro
and now it's so hard to have faith in
anything

especially your next bold move
or the next thing you're gonna need to prove
to yourself

you want to track each trickle
back to its source
and then scream up the faucet
'til your face is hoarse
cuz you're surrounded by a world's worth
of things you just can't excuse

but you've got the hard cough of a chain smoker
and you're at the arctic circle playing strip poker
and it's getting colder and colder
everytime you lose

so go ahead
make your next bold move
tell us
what's the next thing you're gonna have to prove
to yourself

coming of age during the plague
of reagan and bush
watching capitalism gun down democracy
it had this funny effect on me
I guess

I am cancer
I am HIV
and I am down at the blue jesus
blue cross hospital
just lookin' up from my pillow
feeling blessed

and the mighty multinationals
have monopolized the oxygen
so it's as easy as breathing
for us all to participate

yes they're buying and selling
off shares of air
and you know it's all around you
but it's hard to point and say "there"
so you just sit on your hands
and quietly contemplate

your next bold move
the next thing you're gonna have to prove
to yourself

what a waste of thumbs that are opposable
to make machines that are disposable
and sell them to seagulls flying in circles
around one big right wing

yes, the left wing was broken long ago
by the slingshot of cointelpro
and now it's so hard to have faith in
anything

especially your next bold move
or the next thing you're gonna need to prove
to yourself

you want to track each trickle
back to its source
and then scream up the faucet
'til your face is hoarse
cuz you're surrounded by a world's worth
of things you just can't excuse

but you've got the hard cough of a chain smoker
and you're at the arctic circle playing strip poker
and it's getting colder and colder
everytime you lose

so go ahead
make your next bold move
tell us
what's the next thing you're gonna have to prove
to yourself

How can I go home
With nothing to say?
I know you're going to look at me that way
And say "What did you do out there?
And what did you decide?"
You said you needed time
And you had time

You are a china shop
And I am a bull
You are really good food
And I am full
I guess everything is timing
I guess everything's been said
So I am coming home with an empty head

You'll say "Did they love you or what?"
I'll say "They love what I do
The only one who really loves me is you"
And you'll say "Girl, did you kick some butt?"
And I'll say "I don't really remember
But my fingers are sore
And my voice is too"

You'll say "It's really good to see you"
You'll say "I missed you horribly"
You'll say "Let me carry that
Give that to me"
And you will take the heavy stuff
And you will drive the car
And I'll look out the window and make jokes
About the way things are

How can I go home
With nothing to say?
I know you're going to look at me that way
And say "What did you do out there?
And what did you decide?"
You said you needed time
and you had time

You had time...
You had time...
You had time...
You had time...

How can I go home
With nothing to say?
I know you're going to look at me that way
And say "What did you do out there?
And what did you decide?"
You said you needed time
And you had time

You are a china shop
And I am a bull
You are really good food
And I am full
I guess everything is timing
I guess everything's been said
So I am coming home with an empty head

You'll say "Did they love you or what?"
I'll say "They love what I do
The only one who really loves me is you"
And you'll say "Girl, did you kick some butt?"
And I'll say "I don't really remember
But my fingers are sore
And my voice is too"

You'll say "It's really good to see you"
You'll say "I missed you horribly"
You'll say "Let me carry that
Give that to me"
And you will take the heavy stuff
And you will drive the car
And I'll look out the window and make jokes
About the way things are

How can I go home
With nothing to say?
I know you're going to look at me that way
And say "What did you do out there?
And what did you decide?"
You said you needed time
and you had time

You had time...
You had time...
You had time...
You had time...

How can I go home
With nothing to say?
I know you're going to look at me that way
And say "What did you do out there?
And what did you decide?"
You said you needed time
And you had time

You are a china shop
And I am a bull
You are really good food
And I am full
I guess everything is timing
I guess everything's been said
So I am coming home with an empty head

You'll say "Did they love you or what?"
I'll say "They love what I do
The only one who really loves me is you"
And you'll say "Girl, did you kick some butt?"
And I'll say "I don't really remember
But my fingers are sore
And my voice is too"

You'll say "It's really good to see you"
You'll say "I missed you horribly"
You'll say "Let me carry that
Give that to me"
And you will take the heavy stuff
And you will drive the car
And I'll look out the window and make jokes
About the way things are

How can I go home
With nothing to say?
I know you're going to look at me that way
And say "What did you do out there?
And what did you decide?"
You said you needed time
and you had time

You had time...
You had time...
You had time...
You had time...

you think you're not worthy
i'd have to say i agree
i'm not worthy of you
you're not worthy of me
which of us is deserving
look at the human race
the whole planet at arm's length
and we don't deserve this place

what good is a poker face
when you've got an open hand
i was supposed to be cool about this
yeah i remember cool was the plan
tried to keep it all under wraps
but the wraps kept going slack
i keep turning around
i keep coming back

give me your vertical
your horizontal line
i want to take each of them
bend them to fit mine
the world is too good for me
i am such a naughty girl
but when we're together
we're too good for this world

you think you're not worthy
i'd have to say i agree
i'm not worthy of you
you're not worthy of me
i'm not worthy of you
you aren't worthy of me...

lying on the floor
four stories high
in the corridor
between the asphalt and the sky
i am caught like bottled water
the light daughter
i wonder what you look like
under your t-shirt
i wonder what you sound like
when you're not wearing words
i wonder what we have
when we're not pretending
it's never-ending, haven't you heard?
i don't need to tell you
what this is about
you just start on the inside
and work your way out
we are all polylingual
but some of us pretend
there's virtue in relying
on not trying to understand
we're all citizens of the womb
before we subdivide
into sexes and shades
this side
that side
and i don't need to tell you
what this is about
you just start on the inside
and work your way out
undressing for the fan
like it was a man
wondering about all the things
that i'll never understand
there are some things that you can't know
unless you've been there
but oh how far we could go
if we started to share
i don't need to tell you
what it is about
you just start on the inside
you just start on the inside
and work your way out

Wishin', and hopin', and thinkin', and prayin',
Plannin' and dreamin' each night of his charms,
That won't get you into his arms.

So if your're looking for love, you can share,
All you gotta to is hold him, and kiss him, and love him,
And show him that you care.

Show him that you care, just for him.
Do the things that he likes to do.
Wear your hair just for him,
'Cause you won't get him
Thinkin' and a prayin',
Wishin' and a hopin',

Just wishin', and hopin', and thinkin', and prayin',
Planning and dreamin'
His kisses will start.
That won't get you into his heart.

So if you're thinking how great true love is,
All you gotta do is hold him,
And kiss him,
And squeeze him,
And love him,
Just do it,
And after you do,
You will be his.

Show him that you care just for him.
Do the things that he likes to do.
Wear your hair just for him,
'Cause, you won't get him,
Thinkin' and a prayin',
Wishin' and a hopin'.

Just wishin',
And hopin',
And thinkin',
And prayin',
Planning
And dreamin'
His kisses will start.
That won't get you into his heart.

So if you're thinking how great true love is,
All you gotta do is hold him,
And kiss him,
And squeeze him,
And love him,
Just do it,
And after you do,
You will be his.

You...will...be...his.

you will be his!

i am losing my love for adventure
i'm losing all respect
for me and myself tonight
i wonder what happens if i get to
the end of this tunnel
and there isn't a light
i've worn down the treads
on all of my tires
i've worn through the elbows
and the knees of my clothing
i am stumbling down
the gravel driveway of desire
trying not to wake up
my sleeping self-loathing

do you ever have that dream
where you open your mouth
and you try to scream
but you can't make a sound
that's every day starting now
that's every day starting now

don't tell me it's gonna be alright
you can't sell me on your optimism tonight

it's stiff competition
to see who can stay up later
the stars or the street lights
all they really want
is to be alone with the darkness
no more wish i may
no more wish i might

it takes a stiff upper lip
just to hold up my face
i got to suck it up and savor
the taste of my own behavior
i am spinning with longing
faster than a roulette wheel
this is not who i meant to be
this is not how i meant to feel

i don't think i am strong enough
to do this much longer
god i wish i was stronger
this song could never be long enough
to express every longing
god i wish it was longer

there's no place in this world where i'll belong when i'm gone.
and i won't know the right from the wrong when i'm gone.
and you won't find me singin' on this song when i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
and i won't feel the flowing of the time when i'm gone.
all the pleasures of love will not be mine when i'm gone.
my pen won't pour out a lyric line when i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
and i won't breathe the bracing air when i'm gone.
and i can't even worry 'bout my cares when i'm gone.
won't be asked to do my share when i'm gone.
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
and i won't be running from the rain when i'm gone.
and i can't even suffer from the pain when i'm gone.
can't say who's to praise and who's to blame when i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
won't see the golden of the sun when i'm gone.
and the evenings and the mornings will be one when i'm gone.
can't be singing louder than the guns when i'm gone.
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
all my days won't be dances of delight when i'm gone.
and the sands will be shifting from my sight when i'm gone.
can't add my name into the fight while i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
and i won't be laughing at the lies when i'm gone.
and i can't question how or when or why when i'm gone.
can't live proud enough to die when i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.

there's no place in this world where i'll belong when i'm gone.
and i won't know the right from the wrong when i'm gone.
and you won't find me singin' on this song when i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
and i won't feel the flowing of the time when i'm gone.
all the pleasures of love will not be mine when i'm gone.
my pen won't pour out a lyric line when i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
and i won't breathe the bracing air when i'm gone.
and i can't even worry 'bout my cares when i'm gone.
won't be asked to do my share when i'm gone.
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
and i won't be running from the rain when i'm gone.
and i can't even suffer from the pain when i'm gone.
can't say who's to praise and who's to blame when i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
won't see the golden of the sun when i'm gone.
and the evenings and the mornings will be one when i'm gone.
can't be singing louder than the guns when i'm gone.
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
all my days won't be dances of delight when i'm gone.
and the sands will be shifting from my sight when i'm gone.
can't add my name into the fight while i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.
and i won't be laughing at the lies when i'm gone.
and i can't question how or when or why when i'm gone.
can't live proud enough to die when i'm gone,
so i guess i'll have to do it while i'm here.

today we are only whatall is nice about us
today we turned on in the blue light of dawn
and made love

and you were not a dot dot dot
waiting for me to complete you
and it was like i just forgot
to measure everything that i do

we woke up with the notion
that enough is not enough without more
and then we pushed with one motion
like the ocean heaves a wave at the shore

(*actually sang with push & heave reversed*)

and you were not a dot dot dot
leaning forward expectantly
and i was not in such a rush
to insure my autonomy

today we are only whatall is nice about us

today we are only whatall is nice about us
today we turned on in the blue light of dawn
and made love

and you were not a dot dot dot
waiting for me to complete you
and it was like i just forgot
to measure everything that i do

we woke up with the notion
that enough is not enough without more
and then we pushed with one motion
like the ocean heaves a wave at the shore

(*actually sang with push & heave reversed*)

and you were not a dot dot dot
leaning forward expectantly
and i was not in such a rush
to insure my autonomy

today we are only whatall is nice about us

If my life were a movie
there would be a sunset
and the camera would pan away
but the sky is just a little sister
tagging along behind the buildings
trying to imitate their grey
the little boys are breaking bottles
along the sidewalk
the big boys, too
the girls are hanging out at the candy store
pumping quarters into the phone
'cause they don't want to go home

and I think,
what if no one's watching
what it when we're dead, we're just dead
what if it's just us down here
what if god ain't looking down
what if he's looking up instead

if my life were a movie
I would light a cigarette
and the smoke would curl around my face
everything I do would be interesting
I'd play the good guy
in every scene
but I always feel I have to
take a stand
and there's always someone on hand
to hate me for standing there
I always feel I have to open my mouth
and every time I do
I offend someone
somewhere

but what
what if no one's watching
what if when we're dead, we're just dead
what if there's no time to lose
what if there's things we gotta do
things that need to be said

you know I can't apologize
for everything I know
I mean you don't have to agree with me
but once you get me going
you better just let me go
we have to be able to criticize
what we love
say what we have to say
'cause if you're not trying to make something better
as far as I can tell
you're just in the way

I mean what
what if no one's watching
what if when we're dead
we're just dead
what if it's just us down here
what if god is just an idea
someone put in your head

I mean what
what if no one's watching
what if no one's watching...

What what what what what did you think you were doing?
How how how how how did you think this would go?
When when when when when you showed up on my radar
Where where where where where did you think you would show?
What what what what what do you make of this station
How how how how how it pulls away from the train?
When when when when when if at all will you realize
Where where where where where do and done are the same?
What what what what what now you're out in the open
How how how how how do you think you can hide?


When when when when when will you find some nice soft sand
Where where where where where you can bury your pride?
What what what what what do you want from this lifetime?
How how how how how does your story line flow?
When when when when when you finally get to the punch line
Where where where where where will the applause sign go?

And why why why why why don't you just take your bow
'cause who's gonna love you now?

What what what what what did you think you were doing?
How how how how how did you think this would go?
When when when when when you showed up on my radar
Where where where where where did you think you would show?
What what what what what do you make of this station
How how how how how it pulls away from the train?
When when when when when if at all will you realize
Where where where where where do and done are the same?
What what what what what now you're out in the open
How how how how how do you think you can hide?


When when when when when will you find some nice soft sand
Where where where where where you can bury your pride?
What what what what what do you want from this lifetime?
How how how how how does your story line flow?
When when when when when you finally get to the punch line
Where where where where where will the applause sign go?

And why why why why why don't you just take your bow
'cause who's gonna love you now?

Welcome to:
No amount of stoned makes you feel ok
Welcome to:
This year's alone - brought to you by christmas day
Welcome to:
The darkness into which prayin people pray

It's quiet here except for this song
Now that everybody's gone
But hey
Least you don't have to play along today

Welcome to:
Something like elation when you first open your eyes
Just 'cause it means
That you musta finally got to sleep last night
Welcome to:
The precipice between groundlessness and flight

It's quiet here except for this song
Now that everybody's gone
But hey
Least you don't have to play along today

Besides which
Welcome to:
Taking the good stuff down off of the shelf
And welcome to:
The art of conversation with yourself
Welcome to:
Humming an unbroken tune
All day long
Yes it's quiet here
But hey
Least you don't have to play along today

i'll tell you what
there is plenty wrong with me
but i've fixed up a few old buildings
and i've planted a few trees
and children seem to like me
and animals too
like the birds
and the bees

and eating a sandwich
standing over the kitchen counter
with only the sound of chewing in the room
i see you as a challenge
that i will eagerly meet
cuz you are way way way way sweet

it's just that kind of evening
that cracks open like a half shaken beer
cool and refreshing and running down your arm
and baby there's really no other place i'd rather be than here
pardon my periodic alarm

you are ever true
ever new new in love
and i mean that in the best and worst way
and i don't really know what i was so mad about
but the full moon is about a week away

i'll tell you what
there is plenty wrong with you
stuff you'd sooner fight for than cop to
but i think it's just more reason why we are meant to be
people say i look like you
and you look like me
and we get this crazy combination
of everything and nothing right
but we are way way way way
way way way way
way tight

think i'm going for a walk now
i feel a little unsteady
i don't want nobody to follow me
'cept maybe you
i could make you happy you know
if you weren't already
i could do a lot of things
and i do

tell you the truth i prefer
the worst of you
too bad you had to have a better half
she's not really my type
but i think you two are forever
and i hate to say it but
you're perfect together

so fuck you
and your untouchable face
and fuck you
for existing in the first place
and who am i
that i should be vying for your touch
and who am i
i bet you can't even tell me that much

two-thirty in the morning
and my gas tank will be empty soon
neon sign on the horizon
rubbing elbows with the moon
a safe haven of sleepless
where the deep fryer's always on
radio is counting down
the top 20 country songs
and out on the porch the fly strip is
waving like a flag in the wind
y'know, i don't look forward
to seeing you again soon
you'll look like a photograph of yourself
taken from far far away
and i won't know what to do
and i won't know what to say

except fuck you...

i see you and i'm so perplexed
what was i thinking
what will i think of next
where can i hide
in the back room there's a lamp
that hangs over the pool table
and when the fan is on it swings
gently side to side
there's a changing constellation
of balls as we are playing
i see orion and say nothing
the only thing i can think of saying

is fuck you...

Think I'm going for a walk now. I feel a little unsteady.
Don't want nobody to follow me. . . 'cept maybe you.

I could make you happy you know if you weren't already.
I could do a lot of things. . .and I do.

To tell you the truth I prefer the worst of you.
Too bad you had to have a better half.

She's not really my type, but I think you two are forever
And I hate to say it, but you're perfect together

So fuck you
And your untouchable face
fuck you
For existing in the first place

And who am I
That I should be vying for your touch
Said who am I
I bet you can't even tell me that much

Two-thirty in the morning and my gas tank will be empty soon
Neon sign on the horizon Rubbing elbows with the moon

It's A safe haven of sleepless Where the deep fryer's always on
radio is counting down the top twenty country songs

And out on the porch the fly strip is waving like a flag in the wind
You know I don't look forward to seeing you again

You'll look like a photograph of yourself taken from far far away
And I won't know what to do. And I won't know what to say

Except fuck you
And your untouchable face
fuck you
For existing in the first place

And who am I
That I should be vying for your touch
Said who am I
I bet you can't even tell me that much

I see you and I'm so perplexed. What was I thinking?
What will I think of next? Where can I hide?

In the back room there's a lamp that hangs over the pool table
And when the fan is on it sways, gently side to side

And There's a changing constellation of balls as we are playing
I see Orion and say nothing the only thing I can think of saying

Is fuck you
And your untouchable face
fuck you
For existing in the first place

who am I
That I should be vying for your touch
Said who am I
I bet you can't even tell me that much

Said who am I
I bet you can't even tell me that much
Said who am I
Sombody just tell me that much

Said who am I
Somebody just tell me that much
Said who am I
Somebody just tell me that much
Said who am I
Somebody, somebody just tell me that much. . .

you were fresh off the boat from virginia
i had a year in new york city under my belt
we met in a dream
we were both 19
i remember where we were standing
i remember how it felt
2 little girls growing out of their training bras
this little girl breaks furniture, this little girl breaks laws
2 girls together
just a little less alone
this little girl cries wee wee
all the way home

you were always half crazy, now look at you baby
make about as much sense as a nursery rhyme
love is a piano dropped out a four story window
and you were in the wrong place at the wrong time

i don't like your girlfriend, yeah i don't like her
never seen one of your lovers do you so much harm
i loved you first and you know i would prefer
if she didn't empty her syringes into your arm

here comes little naked me padding up to the bathroom door
to find little naked you slumped on the bathroom floor
so i guess i'll just stand here with my back against the wall
while you distilled your whole life down to a 911 call
[chorus]

so now you bring me your bruises
so i can oh and ah at the display
maybe i'm supposed to make one of my famous jokes that makes everything ok
maybe i'm supposed to be the handsome prince who rides up and unties your hands
or maybe i'm supposed to be the furrow-browed friend who thinks she understands

here comes little naked me......[etc]

the sun is setting on the century
and we armed to the teeth
we're all working together now
to make our lives mercifully brief
schoolkids keep trying to teach us
what guns are all about
confuse liberty with weaponry
and watch your kids act it out
every year now like christmas
some boy gets the milkfed suburban blues
reaches for the available arsenal
and saunters off to make the news
and the women in the middle
arelearning what poor women have always known
that the edge is closer than you think
whe your men bring the guns home

look at where the profits are
that's how you'll find the source
of the big lie that you and i
both know so well
in the time it take this cultural
death wish to run its course
they're gonna make a pretty penny
and then they're all going to hell
he said the chickens all come home to roost
yeah malcolm forecasted this flood
are we really gonna sleep through another century
while the rich profit off our blood?
true it may take some doing
to see this undoing through
but in my humble opinion
here's what i suggest we do

open fire on hollywood
open fire on MTV
open fire on NBC
and CBS and ABC
open fire on the NRA
and all the lies they told us
along the way
open fire on each weapons manufacturer
while he's giving head
to some republican senator

and if i hear one more time
about a fool's right
to his tools of rage
i'm gonna take all my friends
and i'm gonna move to canada
and we're gonna die of old age

the sun is setting on the century
and we armed to the teeth
we're all working together now
to make our lives mercifully brief
schoolkids keep trying to teach us
what guns are all about
confuse liberty with weaponry
and watch your kids act it out
every year now like christmas
some boy gets the milkfed suburban blues
reaches for the available arsenal
and saunters off to make the news
and the women in the middle
arelearning what poor women have always known
that the edge is closer than you think
whe your men bring the guns home

look at where the profits are
that's how you'll find the source
of the big lie that you and i
both know so well
in the time it take this cultural
death wish to run its course
they're gonna make a pretty penny
and then they're all going to hell
he said the chickens all come home to roost
yeah malcolm forecasted this flood
are we really gonna sleep through another century
while the rich profit off our blood?
true it may take some doing
to see this undoing through
but in my humble opinion
here's what i suggest we do

open fire on hollywood
open fire on MTV
open fire on NBC
and CBS and ABC
open fire on the NRA
and all the lies they told us
along the way
open fire on each weapons manufacturer
while he's giving head
to some republican senator

and if i hear one more time
about a fool's right
to his tools of rage
i'm gonna take all my friends
and i'm gonna move to canada
and we're gonna die of old age

the sun is setting on the century
and we armed to the teeth
we're all working together now
to make our lives mercifully brief
schoolkids keep trying to teach us
what guns are all about
confuse liberty with weaponry
and watch your kids act it out
every year now like christmas
some boy gets the milkfed suburban blues
reaches for the available arsenal
and saunters off to make the news
and the women in the middle
arelearning what poor women have always known
that the edge is closer than you think
whe your men bring the guns home

look at where the profits are
that's how you'll find the source
of the big lie that you and i
both know so well
in the time it take this cultural
death wish to run its course
they're gonna make a pretty penny
and then they're all going to hell
he said the chickens all come home to roost
yeah malcolm forecasted this flood
are we really gonna sleep through another century
while the rich profit off our blood?
true it may take some doing
to see this undoing through
but in my humble opinion
here's what i suggest we do

open fire on hollywood
open fire on MTV
open fire on NBC
and CBS and ABC
open fire on the NRA
and all the lies they told us
along the way
open fire on each weapons manufacturer
while he's giving head
to some republican senator

and if i hear one more time
about a fool's right
to his tools of rage
i'm gonna take all my friends
and i'm gonna move to canada
and we're gonna die of old age

tiptoeing through the used condoms
strewn on the piers
off the west side highway
sunset behind
the skyline of jersey
walking towards the water
with a fetus holding court in my gut
my body highjacked
my tits swollen and sore
the river has more colors at sunset
than my sock drawer ever dreamed of
i could wake up screaming sometimes
but i don't
i could step off the end of this pier but i got
shit to do
and an appointment on tuesday
to shed uninvited blood and tissue
i'll miss you i say
to the river to the water
to the son or daughter
i thought better of
i could fall in love
with jersey at sunset
but i leave the view to the rats
and tiptoe back.

got a garden of songs where i grow all my thoughts
wish i could harvest one or two for some small talk
i'm always starving for words when you're around
nothing on my tongue so much in my ground

half the time i got my gaze trained on your motel door
fourth door from the end
rest of the time my gaze lays like a stain on the carpeted floor
if it weren't for my brain i'd go over and make friends
too bad about my brain 'cause i'd like to make friends.

see the little song bird unable to make a sound
even though she follows her words from town to town
we both have gardens of songs and maybe its okay
that i am speechless because i picked you this bouquet.

the slant
a building settling around me
my figure female framed crookedly
in the threshold
of the room
door scraping floorboards
with every opening
carving a rough history
of bedroom scenes
the plot hard to follow
the text obscured
in the folds of sheets
slowly gathering the stains
of seasons spent lying there
red and brown
like leaves fallen
the colors of an eternal cycle
fading with the
wash cycle
and the rinse cycle
again an unfamiliar smell
like my name misspelled
or misspoken
a cycle broken
the sound of them strong
stalking talking about their prey
like the way hammer meets nail
pounding, they say
pounding out the rhythms of attraction
like a woman was a drum like a body was a weapon
like there was something more they wanted
than the journey
like it was owed to them
steel toed they walk
and i'm wondering why this fear of men
maybe it's because i'm hungry
and like a baby i'm dependent on them
to feed me
i am a work in progress
dressed in the fabric of a world unfolding
offering me intricte patterns of questions
rhythms that never come clean
and strengths that you still haven't seen

I'm calling from the diner
the diner on the corner
I ordered two coffees
one is for you
I was hoping you'd join me
'cause I ain't go no money
and I really miss you
I should mention that too

yes I know what time it is
in fact, I just checked
I even know the date
and the month
and the year
I know I haven't been sleeping
and when I do
I just dream of you
dear

I miss watching you
drool on your pillow
I miss watching you
pull on your clothes
I miss listening
to you in the bathroom
flushing the toilet
blowing your nose

I'm calling from the diner
the diner on the corner
I ordered two coffees
one is for you
the cups are so close
the steam is rising
in one stream
how are you

I think you're the least fucked up
person I've ever met
and that may be as close to the real thing
as I'm ever gonna get
but my quarter's gonna run out now
or so I'm told
I guess I'd better go sit down
and wait for you
til my coffee gets cold

the glory of the atom
begs a reverent word
the primary design
of the whole universe
yes, let us sing its praises
let us bow our heads in prayer
at the magnificent consciousness
incarnate there

the smallest unit of matter
with its orbiting electrons
echoing off the solar system
like a hawk in the hills at dawn
the smallest unit of matter
uniting bird and rock and tree
and you and me

oh holy is the atom
the truly intelligent design
to which all of evolution
is graciously aligned
the one single structure
to which everything distills
the air
the wood smoke there
and the hills

leave me here surrounded
by everything that's real
far outside the boundaries
of the digitized ordeal
leave me here awake
leave me here to heal

human beings are a cross
between monkeys and ants
you can see us from your spaceship
melting the polar ice caps
with our arrogance
summon a congress of angels
dressed in riot gear
we got ourselves a serious situation
down here

i have this great great uncle
who worked on the atomic bomb
he got a nobel prize in physics
and a place in this song
and i bet there were no windows
and no women in the room
when they applied themselves
to the pure science of
boom

yes, messing with the atom
is the highest form of blasphemy
whether you are making weapons
or simple electricity
someone fashion me a pulpit
i have been called to engage
with the maniacal heretics
of the nuclear age!

let the religious get religion
let consumers get a clue
let scientists get perspective
let activists get their due
let industry get a conscience
let the earth inherit the meek
let the divinity of nature speak

the glory of the atom
begs a reverent word
the primary design
of the whole universe
yes, let us sing its praises
let us bow our heads in prayer
at the magnificent consciousness
incarnate there

a cold and porcelain lonely
in an old new york hotel
a stranger to a city
that she used to know so well
bathing in a bathroom
that is bathed in the first blue light
of the beginning of a century
at the end of an endless night

then she is wet behind the ears and wafting down the avenue
pre-rush hour
post-rain shower
stillness seeping upwards like steam
from another molten sewer
summer in new york

they've been spraying us with chemicals in our sleep
us / they
something about the mosquitoes having some kind of disease
them / me
CIA foul play
if you ask the guy selling hair dryers out of a gym bag
chemical warfare
"i'm telling you, lab rat to lab rat," he says, "that's where the truth is
at"
that's where the truth is at
that's where the truth is at

and everything seems to have gone terribly wrong that can
but one breath at a time is an acceptable plan
she tells herself
and the air is still there
and this morning it's even breathable
and for a second the relief is unbelievable
and she's a heavy sack of flour sifted
her burden lifted
she's full of clean wind for one lean moment
and then she's trapped again
reverted
caged and contorted
with no way to get free
and she's getting plenty of little kisses
but nobody's slippin' her the key

her whole life is a long list of what ifs
and she doesn't even know where to begin
and the pageantry of suffering therein
rivals television
tv is, after all, the modern day roman coliseum
human devastation as mass entertainment
and now millions sit jeering
collectively cheering
the bloodthirsty hierarchy of the patriarchal arrangement

she is hailing a cab
she is sailing down the avenue
she's 19 going on 30
or maybe she's really 30 now ...
it's hard to say
it's hard to keep up with time once it's on its way

and, you know, she never had much of a chance
born into a family built like an avalanche
and somewhere in the 80s between the oat bran and the ozone
she started to figure out things like why
one eye pointed upwards looking for the holes in the sky
one eye on the little flashing red light
a picasso face twisted and listing down the canvas
of the end of an endless night

10 9 8 seven six 5 4 three 2 one
and kerplooey
you're done.
you're done for.
you're done for good.
so tell me
did you?
did you do
did you do all you could?

a cold and porcelain lonely
in an old new york hotel
a stranger to a city
that she used to know so well
bathing in a bathroom
that is bathed in the first blue light
of the beginning of a century
at the end of an endless night

then she is wet behind the ears and wafting down the avenue
pre-rush hour
post-rain shower
stillness seeping upwards like steam
from another molten sewer
summer in new york

they've been spraying us with chemicals in our sleep
us / they
something about the mosquitoes having some kind of disease
them / me
CIA foul play
if you ask the guy selling hair dryers out of a gym bag
chemical warfare
"i'm telling you, lab rat to lab rat," he says, "that's where the truth is
at"
that's where the truth is at
that's where the truth is at

and everything seems to have gone terribly wrong that can
but one breath at a time is an acceptable plan
she tells herself
and the air is still there
and this morning it's even breathable
and for a second the relief is unbelievable
and she's a heavy sack of flour sifted
her burden lifted
she's full of clean wind for one lean moment
and then she's trapped again
reverted
caged and contorted
with no way to get free
and she's getting plenty of little kisses
but nobody's slippin' her the key

her whole life is a long list of what ifs
and she doesn't even know where to begin
and the pageantry of suffering therein
rivals television
tv is, after all, the modern day roman coliseum
human devastation as mass entertainment
and now millions sit jeering
collectively cheering
the bloodthirsty hierarchy of the patriarchal arrangement

she is hailing a cab
she is sailing down the avenue
she's 19 going on 30
or maybe she's really 30 now ...
it's hard to say
it's hard to keep up with time once it's on its way

and, you know, she never had much of a chance
born into a family built like an avalanche
and somewhere in the 80s between the oat bran and the ozone
she started to figure out things like why
one eye pointed upwards looking for the holes in the sky
one eye on the little flashing red light
a picasso face twisted and listing down the canvas
of the end of an endless night

10 9 8 seven six 5 4 three 2 one
and kerplooey
you're done.
you're done for.
you're done for good.
so tell me
did you?
did you do
did you do all you could?

he said ani, you've gotten tough
'cause my tone was curt
yeah, and when i'm approached in a dark alley
i don't lift my skirt
in this city
self-preservation
is a full time occupation
i'm determined
to survive on this shore
you know i don't
avert my eyes anymore
in a man's world
i am a woman by birth
and after nineteen times around i have found
they will stop at nothing once they know what you are worth
talk to me now
i played the powerless
in too many dark scenes
and i was blessed with a birth and a death
and i guess i just want some say in between
don't you understand
in the day to day
and the face to face
i have to act
just as strong as i can
just to preserve a place
where i can be who i am
so if you still know how
talk to me now

are you weary as water
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head

she came to and her
whole life was how she remembered it
she had a mouth full of fur
and she was laughing
she parked her hearse across
three spaces posted "motorcycles only"
and jumped out shouting
what the cus could make a nice girl like us
feel so lonely?

are you weary as water
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head

please dumb blind kind sir
lend little miss listless just a little bit of christmas
she's been a real good girl
but now she's stuck here
the world is so little and still
mysterious and ominous as ever before
like an unmarked bottle full of pills
on the shelf right next to the thing
you were reaching for

are you weary as water
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head

swing the groove 'round here
where i can reach it
when i get my ass back on track
i'm gonna need it
swing shift til i get the money
to buy me and my baby a moon full of honey
then i'm gonna turn off the nagging voices
inside my head
that follow me to bed and say (you suck)

are you weary as water (what'd you do that for?)
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head
(end of radio version rest is only on To the Teeth)
if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
happiness spread it all around (break it down down)
racist stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
so if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
ignorance stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
then happiness spread it all around (break it down down)

tcha who said funk and hip hop can't match
put us together on a stage and like a match
KABOOM guess who stepped in the room
sweepin ya off ya feel like we had a broom
with ani difranco and Maceo.
add a little freestyle flow and who knows
put a little scratchin into the mix and
its enough to get you high if you need a fixin

if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
ignorance stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
happiness spread it all around (break it down down)
if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
happiness spread it all around (break it down down)
racist stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
break it down down down down (fades out)

are you weary as water
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head

she came to and her
whole life was how she remembered it
she had a mouth full of fur
and she was laughing
she parked her hearse across
three spaces posted "motorcycles only"
and jumped out shouting
what the cus could make a nice girl like us
feel so lonely?

are you weary as water
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head

please dumb blind kind sir
lend little miss listless just a little bit of christmas
she's been a real good girl
but now she's stuck here
the world is so little and still
mysterious and ominous as ever before
like an unmarked bottle full of pills
on the shelf right next to the thing
you were reaching for

are you weary as water
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head

swing the groove 'round here
where i can reach it
when i get my ass back on track
i'm gonna need it
swing shift til i get the money
to buy me and my baby a moon full of honey
then i'm gonna turn off the nagging voices
inside my head
that follow me to bed and say (you suck)

are you weary as water (what'd you do that for?)
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head
(end of radio version rest is only on To the Teeth)
if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
happiness spread it all around (break it down down)
racist stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
so if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
ignorance stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
then happiness spread it all around (break it down down)

tcha who said funk and hip hop can't match
put us together on a stage and like a match
KABOOM guess who stepped in the room
sweepin ya off ya feel like we had a broom
with ani difranco and Maceo.
add a little freestyle flow and who knows
put a little scratchin into the mix and
its enough to get you high if you need a fixin

if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
ignorance stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
happiness spread it all around (break it down down)
if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
happiness spread it all around (break it down down)
racist stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
break it down down down down (fades out)

are you weary as water
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head

she came to and her
whole life was how she remembered it
she had a mouth full of fur
and she was laughing
she parked her hearse across
three spaces posted "motorcycles only"
and jumped out shouting
what the cus could make a nice girl like us
feel so lonely?

are you weary as water
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head

please dumb blind kind sir
lend little miss listless just a little bit of christmas
she's been a real good girl
but now she's stuck here
the world is so little and still
mysterious and ominous as ever before
like an unmarked bottle full of pills
on the shelf right next to the thing
you were reaching for

are you weary as water
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head

swing the groove 'round here
where i can reach it
when i get my ass back on track
i'm gonna need it
swing shift til i get the money
to buy me and my baby a moon full of honey
then i'm gonna turn off the nagging voices
inside my head
that follow me to bed and say (you suck)

are you weary as water (what'd you do that for?)
in a faucet left dripping
with an incessant sadness
like a sad record skipping
and an ugly and ornery
and shadowy dread
lurking like a troll under the bridge
between your heart and your head
(end of radio version rest is only on To the Teeth)
if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
happiness spread it all around (break it down down)
racist stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
so if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
ignorance stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
then happiness spread it all around (break it down down)

tcha who said funk and hip hop can't match
put us together on a stage and like a match
KABOOM guess who stepped in the room
sweepin ya off ya feel like we had a broom
with ani difranco and Maceo.
add a little freestyle flow and who knows
put a little scratchin into the mix and
its enough to get you high if you need a fixin

if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
ignorance stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
happiness spread it all around (break it down down)
if you diggin on the sound (break it down down)
no walls up break it down (break it down down)
happiness spread it all around (break it down down)
racist stomp it in the ground (break it down down)
break it down down down down (fades out)

you keep telling me i'm beautiful
but i feel a little less each time
your love is so colorful
it flashes like a neon sign
but i finally drove out where
the sky is dark enuf to see stars
and i found i missed no one
just listening to the swishing of distant cars

i hope i never see
the ocean again
pushing and pulling at me
as i go deeper and deeper in
til i'm so far from my shore
so far from what i came here for
i let you surround me
i let you drown me
out with your din
and then i learned how to swim

i was floating above myself
watching her do just what you wanted
poor little friendly ghost
wondering why her whole house feels haunted
i told myself i was strong enuf
that i had plenty of blood to give
and each elbow cradled a needle
but listless and faint ain't no way to live

so i hope i never see
the ocean again
pushing and pulling at me
as i go deeper and deeper in
til i'm so far from my shore
so far from what i came here for
i let you surround me
i let you drown me
out with your din
and then i learned how to swim

and you keep telling me i'm beautiful
but i feel less and less so each time
your love is so colorful
it flashes like a neon sign
but i finally drove out where
the sky is dark enuf to see the stars
and i found i missed no one
just listening to the swishing of distant cars

you keep telling me i'm beautiful
but i feel a little less each time
your love is so colorful
it flashes like a neon sign
but i finally drove out where
the sky is dark enuf to see stars
and i found i missed no one
just listening to the swishing of distant cars

i hope i never see
the ocean again
pushing and pulling at me
as i go deeper and deeper in
til i'm so far from my shore
so far from what i came here for
i let you surround me
i let you drown me
out with your din
and then i learned how to swim

i was floating above myself
watching her do just what you wanted
poor little friendly ghost
wondering why her whole house feels haunted
i told myself i was strong enuf
that i had plenty of blood to give
and each elbow cradled a needle
but listless and faint ain't no way to live

so i hope i never see
the ocean again
pushing and pulling at me
as i go deeper and deeper in
til i'm so far from my shore
so far from what i came here for
i let you surround me
i let you drown me
out with your din
and then i learned how to swim

and you keep telling me i'm beautiful
but i feel less and less so each time
your love is so colorful
it flashes like a neon sign
but i finally drove out where
the sky is dark enuf to see the stars
and i found i missed no one
just listening to the swishing of distant cars

sleep walking through the all-nite drug store
baptized in fluorescent light
i found religion in the greeting card aisle
now i know hallmark was right
and every pop song on the radio
is suddenly speaking to me
art may imitate life
but life imitates t.v.
'cuz you've been gone exactly two weeks
two weeks and three days
and let's just say that
things look different now
different in so many ways
i used to be a superhero
no one could touch me
not even myself
you are like a phone booth
that i somehow stumbled into
and now look at me
i am just like everybody else
if i was dressed in my best defenses
would you agree to meet me for coffee
if i did my tricks with smoke and mirrors
would you still know which one was me
if i was naked and screaming
on your front lawn
would you turn on the light and come down
screaming, there's the asshole
who did this to me
stripped me of my power
stripped me down
i used to be a superhero
no one could touch me
not even myself
you are like a phone booth
that i somehow stumbled into
and now look at me
i am just like everybody else
yeah you've been gone exactly two weeks
two weeks and three days
and now i'm a different person
different in so many ways
tell me what did you like about me
and don't say my strength and daring
'cuz now i think i'm at your mercy
and it's my first time for this kind of thing
i used to be a superhero
i would swoop down and save me
from myself
but you are like a phone booth
that i somehow stumbled into
and now look at me
i am just like everybody else

cradling the softest, warmest part of you in my hand
feels like a little baby bird fallen from the nest
i think that your body is something i understand
i think that i'm happy, i think that i'm blessed

i've got a lack of inhibition
i've got a loss of perspective
i've had a little bit to drink
and it's making me think
that i can jump ship and swim
that the ocean will hold me
that there's got to be more
than this boat i'm in

'cuz they can call me crazy if i fail
all the chance that i need
is one-in-a-million
and they can call me brilliant
if i succeed
gravity is nothing to me, moving at the speed of sound
i'm just going to get my feet wet
until i drown

and i teeter between tired
and really, really tired
im wiped and im wired but i guess its just as well
because i built my own empire
out of car tires and chicken wire
and i'm queen of my own compost heap
and i'm getting used to the smell

and i've got a lack of information
but i got a little revelation
and i'm climbing up on the railing
trying not to look down
i'm going to do my best swan dive
in the shark-infested waters
i'm gonna pull out my tampon
and start splashing around

'cuz i don't care if they eat me alive
i've got better things to do than survive
i've got a memory of your warm skin in my hand
and i've got a vision of blue sky and dry land

i'm cradling the hardest, heaviest part of me in my hand
the ship is pitching and heaving, my limbs are bobbing and weaving
and i think this is what i understand
i just need a couple vaccinations for my far-away vacation
i'm going to go ahead boldly because a little bird told me
that jumping is easy, that falling is fun
right up 'til you hit the sidewalk, shivering, stunned

and they can call me crazy if i fail
all the chance that i need
is one-in-a-million
and they can call me brilliant
if i succeed
gravity is nothing to me
moving at the speed of sound
i'm just gonna get my feet wet
until i drown...

sleepwalking through the all-nite drugstore
baptized in flourescent light
i found religion in the greeting card aisle
now i know hallmark was right
and every pop song on the radio
is suddenly speaking to me
yeah, art may imitate life
but life imitates t.v.
'cuz you've been gone exactly two weeks
two weeks and three days
and let's just say that things look different now
different in so many ways

i used to be a superhero
no one could touch me
not even myself
you are like a phone booth
i somehow stumbled into
and now look at me
i am just like everybody else

if i was dressed in my best defenses
would you agree to meet me for coffee
if i did my tricks with smoke and mirrors
would you still know which one was me
if i was naked and screaming
on your front lawn
would you turn on the light and come down
screaming, there's the asshole
who did this to me
stripped me of my power
stripped me down

i used to be a superhero
no one could touch me
not even myself
you are like a phone booth
i somehow stumbled into
and now look at me
i am just like everybody else

yeah you've been gone exactly two weeks
two weeks and three days
and now i'm a different person
different in so many ways
tell me what did you like about me
don't say my strength and daring
'cuz now i think i'm at your mercy
and it's my first time for this kind of thing

i used to be a superhero
i would swoop down and save me
from myself
you are like a phone booth
that i somehow stumbled into
and now look at me
i am just like everybody else
i am worse than everybody else

white people are so scared of black people
they bulldoze out to the country
and put up houses on little loop-dee-loop streets
and while america gets its heart cut right out of its chest
the berlin wall still runs down main street
separating east side from west
and nothing is stirring, not even a mouse
in the boarded-up stores and the broken-down houses
so they hang colorful banners off all the street lamps
just to prove they got no manners
no mercy and no sense

and i'm wondering what it will take
for my city to rise
first we admit our mistakes
then we open our eyes
the ghosts of old buildings are haunting parking lots
in the city of good neighbors that history forgot

i remember the first time i saw someone
lying on the cold street
i thought: i can't just walk past here
this can't just be true
but i learned by example
to just keep moving my feet
it's amazing the things that we all learn to do

so we're led by denial like lambs to the slaughter
serving empires of style and carbonated sugar water
and the old farm road's a four-lane that leads to the mall
and our dreams are all guillotines waiting to fall

i'm wondering what it will take
for my country to rise
first we admit our mistakes
and then we open our eyes
or nature succumbs to one last dumb decision
and america the beautiful
is just one big subdivision

white people are so scared of black people
they bulldoze out to the country
and put up houses on little loop-dee-loop streets
and while america gets its heart cut right out of its chest
the berlin wall still runs down main street
separating east side from west
and nothing is stirring, not even a mouse
in the boarded-up stores and the broken-down houses
so they hang colorful banners off all the street lamps
just to prove they got no manners
no mercy and no sense

and i'm wondering what it will take
for my city to rise
first we admit our mistakes
then we open our eyes
the ghosts of old buildings are haunting parking lots
in the city of good neighbors that history forgot

i remember the first time i saw someone
lying on the cold street
i thought: i can't just walk past here
this can't just be true
but i learned by example
to just keep moving my feet
it's amazing the things that we all learn to do

so we're led by denial like lambs to the slaughter
serving empires of style and carbonated sugar water
and the old farm road's a four-lane that leads to the mall
and our dreams are all guillotines waiting to fall

i'm wondering what it will take
for my country to rise
first we admit our mistakes
and then we open our eyes
or nature succumbs to one last dumb decision
and america the beautiful
is just one big subdivision

white people are so scared of black people
they bulldoze out to the country
and put up houses on little loop-dee-loop streets
and while america gets its heart cut right out of its chest
the berlin wall still runs down main street
separating east side from west
and nothing is stirring, not even a mouse
in the boarded-up stores and the broken-down houses
so they hang colorful banners off all the street lamps
just to prove they got no manners
no mercy and no sense

and i'm wondering what it will take
for my city to rise
first we admit our mistakes
then we open our eyes
the ghosts of old buildings are haunting parking lots
in the city of good neighbors that history forgot

i remember the first time i saw someone
lying on the cold street
i thought: i can't just walk past here
this can't just be true
but i learned by example
to just keep moving my feet
it's amazing the things that we all learn to do

so we're led by denial like lambs to the slaughter
serving empires of style and carbonated sugar water
and the old farm road's a four-lane that leads to the mall
and our dreams are all guillotines waiting to fall

i'm wondering what it will take
for my country to rise
first we admit our mistakes
and then we open our eyes
or nature succumbs to one last dumb decision
and america the beautiful
is just one big subdivision

I am out here studying stones
Trying to learn to be less alive
Using all of my will
To keep very still
Still even on the inside
I've cut all of the pertinent wires
So my eyes can't make that connection
I am holding my breath
I am feigning my death
When I'm looking in your direction

'Course numb is an old hat
Old as my oldest memories
See that one's my mother
And that one's my father
And that one in the hat, that's me
It's a skill I'd hoped to abandon
When I got out on the open road
But any more pent up emotion
And I think I'm gonna explode

There's never been an endeavor so strange
As trying to slow the blood in my veins
To keep my face blank
As a stone that just sank
Until not a ripple remains
I am high above the tree line
Sitting cross legged on the ground
When all of the forbidden fruit has fallen and rotted
That's when I'm gonna come down

'Course numb is an old hat
Old as my oldest memories
See that one's my mother
And that one's my father
And that one in the hat, that's me
It's a skill I'd hoped to abandon
When I got out on the open road
But any more pent up emotion
And I think I'm gonna explode

love gets started
and next thing you know
it leaves everything else behind

love sets fire to your schedule
and then calls an end to time

and love ain't far behind you
love ain't far behind

when we're parted
it's always too long
and every time you come back
you come back so strong
and as soon as we can
we gotta go lie down
in that place
where our breath is one sound

and love ain't far behind you
love ain't far behind

i was there to hear your bell
the first time it rang
and the beauty was
the beauty of everything
we are star matter
from the big bang

and that love ain't far behind you
love ain't far behind
no love ain't far behind you
love ain't far behind

I'm sorry i didn't sound more excited on the phone
I'm sorry that after all these years
I've left you feeling unrequited and alone, brought you to tears
I guess i never loved you quite as well as the way you loved me
I guess that i'll never really be able to tell you how sorry
I am

I don't know what it is about you
I just know it's not what it was
I don't know why red fades before blue, it just does
And i don't know what it is about me
That i just can't keep still
I keep thinking someday i will make this all up to you
And maybe someday i will

I guess i never loved you quite as well
As the way you loved me
I guess i'll never really be able to tell you how sorry
I am
Sorry i am
Sorry i am
Sorry i am

i don't keep much stuff around
i value my portability
but i will say that i have saved
every letter you ever wrote to me
the one you left on my windshield
outside of that little motel
is in the pocket of my old gig bag
from back when life was more soft shell

letters littered with little lewd pictures
drawn by the ghost of woody guthrie
who would use you big thick hand
just to draw one or two for me

i think of your letters as love letters
which is how i think of songs
in that it is the writing of them
that tends to carry us along
and i danced to one of your old tunes
with my true love on our wedding day
and you voice sang the way my heart would sing
if it finally knew just what to say

two people pulled over on the same night
to look up at the same stars
they both found their wheels were spinning
in a soft shoulder
when they both got back into their cars
and they missed fates appointed rendezvous
and then a whole lotta time wnet by
and then one day they were done
worshipping the landscape
and they just put down their hands
and moved into the sky

they had barely said hello and it was time to say goodbye

Who's gonna give a shit
Who's gonna take the call
When you find out that the road ahead is painted on a wall
And you're turned up to top volume
And you're just sitting there in pause
With your feral little secret
Scratching at you with its claws
And you're trying hard to figure out
Just exactly how you feel
Before you end up parked and sobbing
Forehead on the steering wheel

Who are you now
And who were you then
That you thought somehow
You could just pretend
That you could figure it all out
The mathematics of regret
So it takes two beers to remember now
And five to forget
That I loved you so
Yeah, I loved you, so what

How many times undone
Can one person be
As they're careening through the facade
Of their favorite fantasy
You just close your eyes slowly
Like you're waiting for a kiss
And hope some lowly little power
Will pull you out of this
But none comes at first
And little comes at all
And when inspiration finally hits you
It barely even breaks your fall

Who were you then
And who are you
Now that you can pretend
That it'll all work out
Subtract out the impact
And the fall is all you get
So here's two beers to remember why
And three more to forget
That I loved you so
Yeah, I loved you, so what
I loved you
So what

Who's gonna give a shit
Who's gonna take the call
When you find out that the road ahead is painted on a wall
And you're turned up to top volume
And you're just sitting there in pause
With your feral little secret
Scratching at you with its claws
And you're trying hard to figure out
Just exactly how you feel
Before you end up parked and sobbing
Forehead on the steering wheel

Who are you now
And who were you then
That you thought somehow
You could just pretend
That you could figure it all out
The mathematics of regret
So it takes two beers to remember now
And five to forget
That I loved you so
Yeah, I loved you, so what

How many times undone
Can one person be
As they're careening through the facade
Of their favorite fantasy
You just close your eyes slowly
Like you're waiting for a kiss
And hope some lowly little power
Will pull you out of this
But none comes at first
And little comes at all
And when inspiration finally hits you
It barely even breaks your fall

Who were you then
And who are you
Now that you can pretend
That it'll all work out
Subtract out the impact
And the fall is all you get
So here's two beers to remember why
And three more to forget
That I loved you so
Yeah, I loved you, so what
I loved you
So what

i don't mind waiting in line
no no
i don't mind if the bills pile up
and the work is slow
i don't mind the gas or the groceries or the grind
long as i'm with you
i'm having a good time

don't mind the stoner waiter
or the poorly cooked food
don't mind little miss kitty
or her knuckle head dude
don't mind if every last person here
is ugly and rude
long as i'm with you
i've got a good attitude
long as i'm with you

we could be stuck in traffic
for over a week
with a car full of quintuplets
who are all cutting teeth
and around my neck
could be a flaming christmas wreath
and i'd be smiling underneath
smiling underneath

i don't mind waking up early
for a flight that's delayed
i don't mind our week's vacation
was chilly and grey
i don't mind the traffic cops of the TSA
long as i'm with you
i'm having a good day

don't mind spilling my hot sauce
onto my white shirt
don't mind that twinge when i walk
in that knee that i hurt
don't mind my gums peeling back
or my hair getting thin
long as i'm with you i win

Felt someone calling me into the howling of the wind.
I heard the reflection of a sound echoing through my skin ...
And a distant drum rumbling under ground gently guides me on ...
Through my wild heart ...
Whispering to me the Sisters Of Avalon...
Sisters Of Avalon... Sisters Of Avalon...

She is awakening in dark swells and mystery.
Unbridled night mares powerful and running free.
You could still hear her cries reverberating through the trees...
For the trampled flowers, the daughters of Eve, the Sisters of Avalon...
Sisters Of Avalon... Sisters Of Avalon...

They brought her in in a new white dress...
But the stain left an ache on her mother's breast...
Now all that's left are the ghostly steps from a distant corridor...

And a distant drum rumbling under ground gently guides me on ...
Through my wild heart ...
Whispering to me the Sisters Of Avalon...
Sisters Of Avalon...
Come on sisters... Come on sister...

Felt someone calling me into the howling of the wind.
I heard the reflection of a sound echoing through my skin ...
And a distant drum rumbling under ground gently guides me on ...
Through my wild heart ...
Whispering to me the Sisters Of Avalon...
Sisters Of Avalon... Sisters Of Avalon...

She is awakening in dark swells and mystery.
Unbridled night mares powerful and running free.
You could still hear her cries reverberating through the trees...
For the trampled flowers, the daughters of Eve, the Sisters of Avalon...
Sisters Of Avalon... Sisters Of Avalon...

They brought her in in a new white dress...
But the stain left an ache on her mother's breast...
Now all that's left are the ghostly steps from a distant corridor...

And a distant drum rumbling under ground gently guides me on ...
Through my wild heart ...
Whispering to me the Sisters Of Avalon...
Sisters Of Avalon...
Come on sisters... Come on sister...

how sick of me
must you be
by now
while you're standing just outside
of what your pride will allow
always reaching into yourself
to find a new way to understand me
when i'm sure that there's no one else
in the world
who could withstand me

the first person in your life
to ever really matter
is saying the last thing
that you want to hear
and you are listening hard
through the splintering shards
of your life as it shatters
and you're standing firm
and you're staying close
and you're seeing clear

i took to the stage
with my outrage
in the bad old days
when you were the make-me-mad guy
but the songs
they come out more slowly
now that i am the bad guy
and i say, i'm sorry i'm so crazy
I am astounded by your patience
and you say, believe it or not, baby
the joy you bring me
still outweighs it

the first person in your life
to ever really matter
is saying the last thing
that you want to hear
and you are listening hard
through the splintering shards
of your life as it shatters

and you're standing firm
and you're staying close
and you're seeing clear

how sick of me
must you be
by now?

how sick of me
must you be
by now
while you're standing just outside
of what your pride will allow
always reaching into yourself
to find a new way to understand me
when i'm sure that there's no one else
in the world
who could withstand me

the first person in your life
to ever really matter
is saying the last thing
that you want to hear
and you are listening hard
through the splintering shards
of your life as it shatters
and you're standing firm
and you're staying close
and you're seeing clear

i took to the stage
with my outrage
in the bad old days
when you were the make-me-mad guy
but the songs
they come out more slowly
now that i am the bad guy
and i say, i'm sorry i'm so crazy
I am astounded by your patience
and you say, believe it or not, baby
the joy you bring me
still outweighs it

the first person in your life
to ever really matter
is saying the last thing
that you want to hear
and you are listening hard
through the splintering shards
of your life as it shatters

and you're standing firm
and you're staying close
and you're seeing clear

how sick of me
must you be
by now?

the heat is so great
it plays tricks with the eye
it turns the road to water
and then from water to sky
and there's a crack in the concrete floor
and it starts at the sink
there's a bathroom in a gas station
and i've locked myself in it to think

and back in the city
the sun bakes the trash on the curb
the men are pissing in doorways
and the rats run in herds
i've got a dream of your face
that scares me awake
i put too much on my table
and now i got too much a stake

and i might let you off easy
yeah i might lead you on
i might wait for you to look for me
and then i might be gone
where i come from and where i'm going
and i'm lost in between
i might go up to that phone booth
and leave a veiled invitation on you machine

and you'll stop me, won't you
if you've heard this one before
the one where i surprise you
by showing up at your front door
saying 'let's not ask what's next,
or how, or why'
i am leaving in the morning
so let's not be shy

the door opens, the room winces
the housekeeper comes in without a warning
and i squint at the muscular motel lady
says 'hey good morning'
and she jumps, her keys jingle
and she leaves as quick as she came in
and i roll over and taste the pillow with my grin
well, the sheets are twisted and tangled
and the heat is so great
and i swear i can feel the mattress
sinking underneath your weight
oh sleep is like a fever
and I'm glad when it ends
and the road flows like a river
and pulls me around every bend

and you'll stop me, won't you...

the heat is so great
it plays tricks with the eye
it turns road to water
and water to sky
and there's a crack in the concrete floor
and it starts at the sink
there's a bathroom in a gas station
and i've locked myself
in it to think

and you'll stop me, won't you...

Well the heat is so great
It plays tricks with the eye
It turns the road into water
Then from water to sky
And there's a crack in the concrete floor
That starts at the sink
Yea, there's a bathroom in the gas station
And I've locked myself in it to think

Back in the city
The sun bakes the trash on the curb
The men are pissing in doorways
And the rats are running in herds
And I've got a dream with your face in it
That scares me awake
I've put too much on my table
Now I've got too much at stake

And I might let you off easy
Yea I might lead you on
I might wait for you to look for me
And then I might be gone
There's where I've come from and where I'm going
And I am lost in between
I might go out to that phone booth
And leave a veiled invitation on your machine

And you'll stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
Oh the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
or how or why
I'm leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"
Don't be shy

The door opens, the room winces
The housekeeper comes in without a warning
And I squint at the muscular motel lady
And say "Hey morning"
As she jumps her keys jingle
She leaves as quickly as she came in
And I roll over and taste the pillow with my grin
Well the sheets are twisted and damp
But the heat is so great
And I swear I can feel the mattress
Sinking underneath your weight
Boy your sleep is like a fever
And I'm glad when it ends
Oh the road flows like a river
And it pulls me round every bend

Stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
Oh the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
or how or why
I am leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"
Don't be shy

Well the heat is so great
It plays tricks with the eye
It turns the road into water
Then from water to sky
And there's a crack in the concrete floor
It starts at the sink
There's a bathroom in the gas station
And I have locked myself in it to think

And you'll stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
yeah the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
or how or why
I am leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"

You'll stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
yeah the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
how or why
I'm leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"

Don't be shy
no dont be shy
no don't be shy
no don't be shy
come on fucker don't be shy

Well the heat is so great
It plays tricks with the eye
It turns the road into water
Then from water to sky
And there's a crack in the concrete floor
That starts at the sink
Yea, there's a bathroom in the gas station
And I've locked myself in it to think

Back in the city
The sun bakes the trash on the curb
The men are pissing in doorways
And the rats are running in herds
And I've got a dream with your face in it
That scares me awake
I've put too much on my table
Now I've got too much at stake

And I might let you off easy
Yea I might lead you on
I might wait for you to look for me
And then I might be gone
There's where I've come from and where I'm going
And I am lost in between
I might go out to that phone booth
And leave a veiled invitation on your machine

And you'll stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
Oh the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
or how or why
I'm leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"
Don't be shy

The door opens, the room winces
The housekeeper comes in without a warning
And I squint at the muscular motel lady
And say "Hey morning"
As she jumps her keys jingle
She leaves as quickly as she came in
And I roll over and taste the pillow with my grin
Well the sheets are twisted and damp
But the heat is so great
And I swear I can feel the mattress
Sinking underneath your weight
Boy your sleep is like a fever
And I'm glad when it ends
Oh the road flows like a river
And it pulls me round every bend

Stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
Oh the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
or how or why
I am leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"
Don't be shy

Well the heat is so great
It plays tricks with the eye
It turns the road into water
Then from water to sky
And there's a crack in the concrete floor
It starts at the sink
There's a bathroom in the gas station
And I have locked myself in it to think

And you'll stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
yeah the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
or how or why
I am leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"

You'll stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
yeah the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
how or why
I'm leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"

Don't be shy
no dont be shy
no don't be shy
no don't be shy
come on fucker don't be shy

Well the heat is so great
It plays tricks with the eye
It turns the road into water
Then from water to sky
And there's a crack in the concrete floor
That starts at the sink
Yea, there's a bathroom in the gas station
And I've locked myself in it to think

Back in the city
The sun bakes the trash on the curb
The men are pissing in doorways
And the rats are running in herds
And I've got a dream with your face in it
That scares me awake
I've put too much on my table
Now I've got too much at stake

And I might let you off easy
Yea I might lead you on
I might wait for you to look for me
And then I might be gone
There's where I've come from and where I'm going
And I am lost in between
I might go out to that phone booth
And leave a veiled invitation on your machine

And you'll stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
Oh the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
or how or why
I'm leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"
Don't be shy

The door opens, the room winces
The housekeeper comes in without a warning
And I squint at the muscular motel lady
And say "Hey morning"
As she jumps her keys jingle
She leaves as quickly as she came in
And I roll over and taste the pillow with my grin
Well the sheets are twisted and damp
But the heat is so great
And I swear I can feel the mattress
Sinking underneath your weight
Boy your sleep is like a fever
And I'm glad when it ends
Oh the road flows like a river
And it pulls me round every bend

Stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
Oh the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
or how or why
I am leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"
Don't be shy

Well the heat is so great
It plays tricks with the eye
It turns the road into water
Then from water to sky
And there's a crack in the concrete floor
It starts at the sink
There's a bathroom in the gas station
And I have locked myself in it to think

And you'll stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
yeah the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
or how or why
I am leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"

You'll stop me, won't you?
If you've heard this one before
yeah the one where I surprise you
By showing up at your front door
Saying, "Let's not ask what next
how or why
I'm leaving in the morning
So let's not be shy"

Don't be shy
no dont be shy
no don't be shy
no don't be shy
come on fucker don't be shy

what's with that halo
hovering
above that thick skull
spare me
if i do say so
i think you're covering
course there was nothing
could have prepared me
for the side effect
of this dirty drug
the way you punish me
and then you shrug

what's with that phone call baby
it's like you're trying
just trying to crush me
do you feel stronger
each time you push me dear
did you tell your mom
you carpet bombed
before you left here
and is it just the side effect
of this dirty drug
or does each apology sound
more like a shrug

are you at home now
with your kitty cats
are you just at home now
with the way that you act
do you split the rent there
with all your secrets
or do you just pretend
to all your friends
they're uninvited guests

yes and

when you want it tidy, tell me,
can you still dispell me,
sweep me
neatly under the rug
and does your conscience ever mention
the way that you treat me
or do you just fend it off
with a.....

she says forget what you have to do
pretend there is nothing
outside this room
and like an idea she came to me
but she came too late
or maybe too soon
i said please try not to love me
close your eyes, i'm turning on the light
you know i have no vacancy
and it's awfully cold outside tonight

the rain stains the brick a darker red
slowly i'm rolling out of her bed
the rain stains the streets a darker black
i dress my face in stone
because i can't go back

i feel her eyes watching me
from behind the curtain of her hair
and she says i'm sorry
i didn't mean to stare
i say i think i really have to go now
but oh baby, maybe someday
maybe somehow.

I cannot name this
I cannot explain this
And I really don't want to
Just call me shameless
I can't even slow this down
Let alone stop this
And I keep looking around
But I cannot top this

If I had any sense
I guess I'd fear this
I guess I'd keep it down
So no one would hear this
I guess I'd shut my mouth
And rethink for a minute
But I can't shut it now
'cuz there's something in it

We're in a room without a door
And I am sure without a doubt
They're gonna wanna know
How we got in here
And they're gonna wanna know
How we plan to get out
We better have a good explanation
For all the fun that we had
'cuz they are coming for us, babe
And they are going to be mad
Yeah they're going to be mad at us

This is my skeleton
This is the skin it's in
That is according to light
And gravity
I'll take off my disguise
The mask you met me in
'cuz I got something
For you to see
Just gimme your skeleton
Give me the skin it's in
Yeah baby, this is you
According to me
I never avert my eyes
I never compromise
So never, never mind
The poetry

We're in a room without a door
And I am sure without a doubt
They're gonna wanna know
How we got in here
And they're gonna wanna know
How we plan to get out
We better have a good explanation
For all the fun that we had
'cuz they are coming for us, babe
And they are going to be mad
Yeah they're going to be mad at us

I gotta cover my butt 'cuz I covet
Another man's wife
I gotta divide my emotions
Into wrong and right
Then I get to see how close I can get to it
Without giving in
Then I get to rub up against it
Till I break the skin
Yeah I got to rub up against it
Till I break the skin

They're gonna be mad at us
They're gonna be mad at me and you
They're gonna be mad at us
And all the things we wanna do
They're gonna be mad at us
They're gonna be mad at me and you
They're gonna be mad at us
And all the things we wanna do

Just please don't name this
Please don't explain this
Just blame it all on me
Say I was shameless
Say I couldn't slow it down
Let alone stop it
And say you just hung around
'cuz you couldn't top it

i cannot name this
i cannot explain this
and i really don't want to
just call me shameless
i can't even slow this down
let alone stop this
and i keep looking around
but i cannot top this

if i had any sense
i guess i'd fear this
i guess i'd keep it down
so no one would hear this
i guess i'd shut my mouth
and rethink a minute
but i can't shut it now
'cuz there's something in it

we're in a room without a door
and i am sure without a doubt
they're gonna wanna know
how we got in here
and they're gonna wanna know
how we plan to get out
we better have a good explanation
for all the fun that we had
'cuz they are coming for us, baby
they are going to be mad
they are going to be mad at us

this is my skeleton
this is the skin it's in
that is, according to light
and gravity
i'll take off my disguise
the mask you met me in
'cuz i got something
for you to see
just gimme your skeleton
give me the skin it's in
yeah baby, this is you
according to me
i never avert my eyes
i never compromise
so nevermind
the poetry

we're in a room without a door...

i gotta cover my butt 'cuz i covet
another man's wife
i got to divide my emotions
between wrong and right
then i get to see how close i can get to it
without giving in
then i get to rub up against it
till i break the skin
rub up against it
till i break the skin

they're gonna be mad at us
they're gonna be mad at me and you
yeah, they're gonna be mad at us
and all the things we wanna do
they're gonna be mad at us
they're gonna be mad at me and you
they're gonna be mad at us
and all the things we like do

just please don't name this
please don't explain this
just blame it all on me
say i was shameless
say i couldn't slow it down
let alone stop it
and say you just hung around
'cuz you couldn't top it

i cannot name this
i cannot explain this
and i really don't want to
just call me shameless
i can't even slow this down
let alone stop this
and i keep looking around
but i cannot top this

if i had any sense
i guess i'd fear this
i guess i'd keep it down
so no one would hear this
i guess i'd shut my mouth
and rethink a minute
but i can't shut it now
'cuz there's something in it

we're in a room without a door
and i am sure without a doubt
they're gonna wanna know
how we got in here
and they're gonna wanna know
how we plan to get out
we better have a good explanation
for all the fun that we had
'cuz they are coming for us, baby
they are going to be mad
they are going to be mad at us

this is my skeleton
this is the skin it's in
that is, according to light
and gravity
i'll take off my disguise
the mask you met me in
'cuz i got something
for you to see
just gimme your skeleton
give me the skin it's in
yeah baby, this is you
according to me
i never avert my eyes
i never compromise
so nevermind
the poetry

we're in a room without a door...

i gotta cover my butt 'cuz i covet
another man's wife
i got to divide my emotions
between wrong and right
then i get to see how close i can get to it
without giving in
then i get to rub up against it
till i break the skin
rub up against it
till i break the skin

they're gonna be mad at us
they're gonna be mad at me and you
yeah, they're gonna be mad at us
and all the things we wanna do
they're gonna be mad at us
they're gonna be mad at me and you
they're gonna be mad at us
and all the things we like do

just please don't name this
please don't explain this
just blame it all on me
say i was shameless
say i couldn't slow it down
let alone stop it
and say you just hung around
'cuz you couldn't top it

I cannot name this
I cannot explain this
And I really don't want to
Just call me shameless
I can't even slow this down
Let alone stop this
And I keep looking around
But I cannot top this

If I had any sense
I guess I'd fear this
I guess I'd keep it down
So no one would hear this
I guess I'd shut my mouth
And rethink for a minute
But I can't shut it now
'cuz there's something in it

We're in a room without a door
And I am sure without a doubt
They're gonna wanna know
How we got in here
And they're gonna wanna know
How we plan to get out
We better have a good explanation
For all the fun that we had
'cuz they are coming for us, babe
And they are going to be mad
Yeah they're going to be mad at us

This is my skeleton
This is the skin it's in
That is according to light
And gravity
I'll take off my disguise
The mask you met me in
'cuz I got something
For you to see
Just gimme your skeleton
Give me the skin it's in
Yeah baby, this is you
According to me
I never avert my eyes
I never compromise
So never, never mind
The poetry

We're in a room without a door
And I am sure without a doubt
They're gonna wanna know
How we got in here
And they're gonna wanna know
How we plan to get out
We better have a good explanation
For all the fun that we had
'cuz they are coming for us, babe
And they are going to be mad
Yeah they're going to be mad at us

I gotta cover my butt 'cuz I covet
Another man's wife
I gotta divide my emotions
Into wrong and right
Then I get to see how close I can get to it
Without giving in
Then I get to rub up against it
Till I break the skin
Yeah I got to rub up against it
Till I break the skin

They're gonna be mad at us
They're gonna be mad at me and you
They're gonna be mad at us
And all the things we wanna do
They're gonna be mad at us
They're gonna be mad at me and you
They're gonna be mad at us
And all the things we wanna do

Just please don't name this
Please don't explain this
Just blame it all on me
Say I was shameless
Say I couldn't slow it down
Let alone stop it
And say you just hung around
'cuz you couldn't top it

he caresses every bottle
like it's the first one he's had
saying
it ain't love
but it ain't bad
it's the only reward
bestowed upon me
and i have served faithfully

i can see he is scarred
from doing some hard time
but i let alone what is broken
'cause it isn't mine
he strikes out at me
when i am within reach
then he reaches for me
when i draw the line

sometimes it seems like love
is just a fancy word for compromise
you gotta read between the years
you gotta write between the lines
you gotta try to understand
the grandness of the man behind the petty crimes
and let him off easy sometimes

i have only just met
an old old friend
we've been walking around holding hands
i hope some day he can bend
as far as it takes to understand
and risk breaking open again

Yes,
Us people are just poems
We're 90% metaphor
With a leanness of meaning
Approaching hyper-distillation
And once upon a time
We were moonshine
Rushing down the throat of a giraffe
Yes, rushing down the long hallway
Despite what the p.a. announcement says
Yes, rushing down the long hall
Down the long stairs
In a building so tall
That it will always be there
Yes, it's part of a pair
There on the bow of Noah's ark
The most prestigious couple
Just kickin back parked
Against a perfectly blue sky
On a morning beatific
In its Indian summer breeze
On the day that America
Fell to its knees
After strutting around for a century
Without saying thank you
Or please

And the shock was subsonic
And the smoke was deafening
Between the setup and the punch line
'Cause we were all on time for work that day
We all boarded that plane for to fly
And then while the fires were raging
We all climbed up on the window sill
And then we all held hands
And jumped into the sky

And every borough looked up when it heard the first blast
And then every dumb action movie was summarily surpassed
And the exodus uptown by foot and motorcar
Looked more like war than anything I've seen so far
So far
So far
So fierce and ingenious
A poetic specter so far gone
That every jackass newscaster was struck dumb and stumbling
Over 'Oh my God' and Tthis is unbelievable' and on and on
And I'll tell you what, while we're at it
You can keep the Pentagon
Keep the propaganda
Keep each and every tv
That's been trying to convince me
To participate
In some prep school punk's plan to perpetuate retribution
Perpetuate retribution
Even as the blue toxic smoke of our lesson in retribution
Is still hanging in the air
And there's ash on our shoes
And there's ash in our hair
And there's a fine silt on every mantle
From Hell's Kitchen to Brooklyn
And the streets are full of stories
Sudden twists and near misses
And soon every open bar is crammed to the rafters
With tales of narrowly averted disasters
And the whiskey is flowin
Like never before
As all over the country
Folks just shake their heads
And pour

So here's a toast to all the folks that live in Palestine, Afghanistan, Iraq, El Salvador

Here's a toast to the folks living on the Pine Ridge Reservation
Under the stone cold gaze of Mt. Rushmore

Here's a toast to all those nurses and doctors
Who daily provide women with a choice
Who stand down a threat the size of Oklahoma City
Just to listen to a young woman's voice

Here's a toast to all the folks on death row right now
Awaiting the executioner's guillotine
Who are shackled there with dread and can only escape into their heads
To find peace in the form of a dream, peace in the form of a dream

'Cause take away our Playstations
And we are a third world nation
Under the thumb of some blue blood royal son
Who stole the Oval Office and that phony election
I mean
It don't take a weatherman
To look around and see the weather
Jeb said he'd deliver Florida, folks
And boy, did he ever

And we hold these truths to be self evident:
#1 George W. Bush is not President
#2 America is not a true democracy
#3 The media is not fooling me
'Cause I am a poem heeding hyper-distillation
I've got no room for a lie so verbose
I'm looking out over my whole human family
And I'm raising my glass in a toast

Here's to our last drink of fossil fuels
May we vow to get off of this sauce
Shoo away the swarms of commuter planes
And find that train ticket we lost
'Cause once upon a time, the line followed the river
And peeked into all the backyards
And the laundry was waving
The graffiti was teasing us
From brick walls and bridges
We were rolling over ridges
Through valleys
Under stars
I dream of touring like Duke Ellington
In my own railroad car
I dream of waiting on the tall blonde wooden benches
In a grand station aglow with grace
And then standing out on the platform
And feeling the air on my face

Give back the night its distant whistle
Give the darkness back its soul
Give the big oil companies the finger, finally
And relearn how to rock-n-roll
Yes, the lessons are all around us, and the truth is waiting there
So it's time to pick through the rubble, clean the streets and clear the air
Get our government to pull its big dick out of the sand
Of someone else's desert
Put it back in its pants
And quit the hypocritical chants of
Freedom forever

'Cause when one lone phone rang
In two thousand and one
At ten after nine
On nine one one
Which is the number we all called
When that lone phone rang right off the wall
Right off our desk and down the long hall
Down the long stairs
In a building so tall
That the whole world turned
Just to watch it fall

And while we're at it
Remember the first time around?
The bomb?
The Ryder truck?
The parking garage?
The princess that didn't even feel the pea?
Remember joking around in our apartment on Avenue D?

Can you imagine how many paper coffee cups would have to change their design
Following a fantastical reversal of the New York skyline?!

It was a joke
At the time
And that was just a few years ago
So let the record show
That the FBI was all over that case
That the plot was obvious and in everybody's face
And scoping that scene
Religiously
The CIA
Or is it KGB?
Committing countless crimes against humanity
With this kind of eventuality
As its excuse
For abuse after expensive abuse
And it didn't have a clue
Look, another window to see through
Way up here
On the 104th floor
Look
Another key
Another door
10% literal
90% metaphor
3000 some poems disguised as people
On an almost too perfect day
Must be more than pawns
In some asshole's passion play
So now it's your job
And it's my job
To make it that way
To make sure they didn't die in vain
Sshhhhhh....
Baby, listen
Hear the train?

she went over to his apartment
clutching her decision
and he said, did you come here to tell me goodbye?
so she built a skyscraper of procrastination
and then she leaned out the twenty-fifth floor window
of her reply
and she felt like an actress
just reading her lines
when she finally said
yes, it's really goodbye this time
and far below was the blacktop
and the tiny toy cars
and it all fell so fast
and it all fell so far

and she said:
you are a miracle but that is not all
you are also a stiff drink and i am on call
you are a party and i am a school night
and i'm lookin' for my door key
but you are my porch light

and you'll never know, dear
just how much i loved you
you'll probably think this was
just my big excuse
but i stand committed
to a love that came before you
and the fact that i adore you
is just one of my truths

and what of the mother
whose house is in flames
and both of her children
are in their beds crying
and she loves them both
with the whole of her heart
but she knows she can only
carry one at a time?
she's choking on the smoke
of unthinkable choices
she is haunted by the voices
of so many desires
she's bent over from the business
of begging forgiveness
while frantically running around
putting out fires

but then what kind of scale
compares the weight of two beauties
the gravity of duties
or the ground speed of joy?
tell me what kind of gauge
can quantify elation?
what kind of equation
could i possibly employ?
and you'll never know, dear
just how much i loved you
you probably think this was
just my big excuse
but i stand committed
to a love that came before you
and the fact that i adore you
is just one of my truths

so i
i'm goin' home
to please the one i so love pleasing
and i don't expect
he'll have much sympathy for my grieving
but i guess that this is the price
that we pay for the privilege
of living for even a day
in a world with so many things
worth believing
in

she went over to his apartment
clutching her decision
and he said, did you come here to tell me goodbye?
so she built a skyscraper of procrastination
and then she leaned out the twenty-fifth floor window
of her reply
and she felt like an actress
just reading her lines
when she finally said
yes, it's really goodbye this time
and far below was the blacktop
and the tiny toy cars
and it all fell so fast
and it all fell so far

and she said:
you are a miracle but that is not all
you are also a stiff drink and i am on call
you are a party and i am a school night
and i'm lookin' for my door key
but you are my porch light

and you'll never know, dear
just how much i loved you
you'll probably think this was
just my big excuse
but i stand committed
to a love that came before you
and the fact that i adore you
is just one of my truths

and what of the mother
whose house is in flames
and both of her children
are in their beds crying
and she loves them both
with the whole of her heart
but she knows she can only
carry one at a time?
she's choking on the smoke
of unthinkable choices
she is haunted by the voices
of so many desires
she's bent over from the business
of begging forgiveness
while frantically running around
putting out fires

but then what kind of scale
compares the weight of two beauties
the gravity of duties
or the ground speed of joy?
tell me what kind of gauge
can quantify elation?
what kind of equation
could i possibly employ?
and you'll never know, dear
just how much i loved you
you probably think this was
just my big excuse
but i stand committed
to a love that came before you
and the fact that i adore you
is just one of my truths

so i
i'm goin' home
to please the one i so love pleasing
and i don't expect
he'll have much sympathy for my grieving
but i guess that this is the price
that we pay for the privilege
of living for even a day
in a world with so many things
worth believing
in

rush hour
and the day's dawning
the rain came
and pushed me under the awning
the puddles grew and threw themselves at me
with every passing car
i'm shielding my guitar
and there were some things that i
did not tell him
there were certain things
he did not need to know
and there were some days
when i did not love him
he didn't understand me
and i don't know why
i didn't go
he said change the channel
i've got problems of my own
i'm so sick of hearing about drugs
and aids
and people without homes
and i said, well,
i'd like to sympathize with that
but if you don't understand
then how can you act
i expected summer to be there in the morning
i woke to the alarm
but she was out of arms reach
sneaking out
on silent thighs
that were spent and sore
from the hot nights that came before
he said i looked for you
i don't know why
i said i was wearing black so you could
see me against the sky
take your big leather boots
and your buckles and your chains
put them on a downtown train
i expected he would be there in the morning
i awoke to the alarm
he was still in arm's reach
but his body was just a disguise
his mind had wandered off long ago
you see in his eyes
love isn't over when the sheets are stained
in my head there remains
so much left to be said
make me laugh, make me cry, enrage me
but just don't try to disengage me

i could sing you round a pole
i could talk you up a tree
but when it comes to what really matters
you are way more clever than me

i knew i wanted to be challenged
but i was unclear about how
so i'll be the guy with the toolbox
and you be the fun lovin gal

and i'll learn to fix stuff
if you will teach me love
and god will radiate out from within us
instead of this bullshit from above
and we can dance round like monkeys
after the paparazzi have gone home
having let go forever
the fallacy of ever being alone

i could sing you round a pole
like a ball at the end of a rope
have you duckin and sluggin
protecting your head
but i decided just to love you back instead

cuz i have studied my own pain
like an ambitious scientist
and i've discovered it's all the same
and has nothing to do with this

so i'll learn to fix stuff
if you will teach me love
and god will radiate out from within us
instead of this bullshit from above
and we can dance around like monkeys
after the paparazzi have gone home
having let go forever
the fallacy of ever being alone

she says my ass hurts
when i sit down
she says my feet hurt
from just standing around
i think my body
is as restless as my mind
and i don't know if i can roll with it
this time

packed his uniforms
and drove him to the base
she was crying all the way
the world looked her in the face
and said
roll with it, baby
make it your career
keep the home fires burning
till america is in the clear

the mainstream is so polluted with lies
once you get wet, it's so hard to get dry
we're all taught how to justify
history
as it passes by
and it's your world
that comes crashing down
when the big boys decide
to throw their weight around
but just roll with it baby
make it your career
keep the home fires burning
till america is in the clear

what if the enemy
isn't in a distant land
what if the enemy lies behind
the voice of command
the sound of war
is a child's cry
behind tinted windows,
they just drive by
all i know is that those
who are going to be killed
aren't those who preside
on capitol hill
i told him,
don't fill the front lines
of their war
those assholes aren't worth dying for
but he said
roll with it, baby
make it your career
keep the home fires burning
till america is in the clear

she says my ass hurts
when i sit down
she says my feet hurt
from just standing around
i think my body is as restless as my mind
and i'm not gonna roll with it this time
no, i'm not gonna roll with it this time

Tending the garden of noise
where i grow the traffic
and the church bells
and the neighborhood boys
singing to myself
when the solitude sets in
in tune with the symphony
of south brooklyn
i sing

rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye, the baby that is me
rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye till i'm fast asleep

the tunnel is train torn
the tracks are worn and sore
i can feel the rattle
riding up through the floor
she jumped the turnstile
he paid for his ride
i am the echo in the station
where their footfalls collide
i left her at the epicenter
we were trembling dutifully
i left him too
i left parts of me
singing...

rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye, the baby that is me
rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye till i'm fast asleep (repeats)

i said today i am leaving
in every sense of the word
but i'm in love with your memory already
everything i've seen and heard
and i will go singing
as the solitude sets in
in time with the rhythm
of everywhere i have been
it sounds like

rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye, the baby that is me
rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye till i'm fast asleep (repeats x3)

tending the garden of noise
where i grow the traffic
and the church bells
and the neighborhood boys
singing to myself
when the solitude sets in
in tune with the symphony
of south brooklyn.

Tending the garden of noise
where i grow the traffic
and the church bells
and the neighborhood boys
singing to myself
when the solitude sets in
in tune with the symphony
of south brooklyn
i sing

rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye, the baby that is me
rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye till i'm fast asleep

the tunnel is train torn
the tracks are worn and sore
i can feel the rattle
riding up through the floor
she jumped the turnstile
he paid for his ride
i am the echo in the station
where their footfalls collide
i left her at the epicenter
we were trembling dutifully
i left him too
i left parts of me
singing...

rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye, the baby that is me
rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye till i'm fast asleep (repeats)

i said today i am leaving
in every sense of the word
but i'm in love with your memory already
everything i've seen and heard
and i will go singing
as the solitude sets in
in time with the rhythm
of everywhere i have been
it sounds like

rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye, the baby that is me
rockabye, rockabye baby
rockabye till i'm fast asleep (repeats x3)

tending the garden of noise
where i grow the traffic
and the church bells
and the neighborhood boys
singing to myself
when the solitude sets in
in tune with the symphony
of south brooklyn.

it's rock paper scissors as to whether
i will get over you at all
it's hand against hand and both hands are mine
it's standing in a circular line
which is not to say that i'm not also happy
a happy meal with a surprise inside
surprise surprise here's another bright light in your eyes
exposing all the stuff you're not calculating enough to hide

this melancholy that i carry makes me feel so grown up
at my kitchen table doing shots of resignation
i never thought i'd see the day when i would say i give up
and break the stallions of my wildest expectations

i do not want to know you this way
surrounded by so much pain
but how am i supposed to let go of you this way
like a bird into the sky of my brain?

i think i could accept all these dark colors
as just part of some bigger color scheme
if it wasn't for that drippy string quartet of sadness
underscoring each smiling scene
desire drags me right out of myself
a gas-soaked rope tied to a piece of coal
and i'm getting pretty good at looking at the bright side
while the flames rip along the sand and swallow me whole

it's rock paper scissors as to whether
i will get over you at all
it's hand against hand and both hands are mine
it's standing in a circular line
which is not to say that i'm not also happy
a happy meal with a surprise inside
surprise surprise here's another bright light in your eyes
exposing all the stuff you're not calculating enough to hide

this melancholy that i carry makes me feel so grown up
at my kitchen table doing shots of resignation
i never thought i'd see the day when i would say i give up
and break the stallions of my wildest expectations

i do not want to know you this way
surrounded by so much pain
but how am i supposed to let go of you this way
like a bird into the sky of my brain?

i think i could accept all these dark colors
as just part of some bigger color scheme
if it wasn't for that drippy string quartet of sadness
underscoring each smiling scene
desire drags me right out of myself
a gas-soaked rope tied to a piece of coal
and i'm getting pretty good at looking at the bright side
while the flames rip along the sand and swallow me whole

you were so in love
that it was all you could talk about
and i think i felt a little left out
you were on cloud 9 all the time
while i was levelling
i was wringing my hands and you were revelling

but then why shouldn't you?
it was such a beautiful thing to do

would that i could get me some
of your yum yum delirium
i could level off the ground that we stand on
but with you down on bended knee
always looking up at me
that feeling of standing up together is gone

and though i love you through all time and space
my love always seems to take second place

you were so in love
that it was all you could talk about
and i think i felt a little left out
you were on cloud 9 all the time
while i was levelling
i was wringing my hands and you were revelling

but then why shouldn't you?
it was such a beautiful thing to do

you were so in love
that it was all you could talk about
and i think i felt a little left out
you were on cloud 9 all the time
while i was levelling
i was wringing my hands and you were revelling

but then why shouldn't you?
it was such a beautiful thing to do

would that i could get me some
of your yum yum delirium
i could level off the ground that we stand on
but with you down on bended knee
always looking up at me
that feeling of standing up together is gone

and though i love you through all time and space
my love always seems to take second place

you were so in love
that it was all you could talk about
and i think i felt a little left out
you were on cloud 9 all the time
while i was levelling
i was wringing my hands and you were revelling

but then why shouldn't you?
it was such a beautiful thing to do

new years eve we dropped mushrooms
and danced around the house
making music with everything that we found
incantation replaced resolution and we
vowed to allow each perfection that we could be
and the goddesses sent word that this would be a red letter year
they didn't mention how much shit was gonna change around here
it's just as well we weren't swollen with unfocused dread
we had visions of sugarplums dancing in our heads
dancing in our heads

first you go under and then you coming up gives you the bends
and when you break the surface
and all you see is your friends
so you grab your purple crayon
and flesh out the picture behind
and finally the whole world is made of one unbroken line
one unbroken line

when you wake up sick as a dog
with dull eyes and really bad hair
standing under a lit sign with the words "on air"
and the water is rising
it's coming in everywhere
just remember you are there
you are always, always there

and representing the white race
is a man with a monkey for a face
is flying over in a helicopter
whistling dixie and playing dumb
in a town that might put a gun to your throat
or rip the roof right off of your place
there's a mold crawling up the walls
and falling asleep in your lungs
and you and i both know how to drink so
we will always have work in this town
and besides the police are stationed at the bridge
and they're preventing passage to higher ground
so let's pull up a bar stool and get ourselves a ring side seat
for one unnerving moment
they're gonna show the truth on tv

new years eve we dropped mushrooms
and danced around the house
making music with everything that we found
incantation replaced resolution and we
vowed to allow each perfection that we could be
and the goddesses sent word that this would be a red letter year
they didn't mention how much shit was gonna change around here
it's just as well we weren't swollen with unfocused dread
we had visions of sugarplums dancing in our heads
dancing in our heads

first you go under and then you coming up gives you the bends
and when you break the surface
and all you see is your friends
so you grab your purple crayon
and flesh out the picture behind
and finally the whole world is made of one unbroken line
one unbroken line

when you wake up sick as a dog
with dull eyes and really bad hair
standing under a lit sign with the words "on air"
and the water is rising
it's coming in everywhere
just remember you are there
you are always, always there

and representing the white race
is a man with a monkey for a face
is flying over in a helicopter
whistling dixie and playing dumb
in a town that might put a gun to your throat
or rip the roof right off of your place
there's a mold crawling up the walls
and falling asleep in your lungs
and you and i both know how to drink so
we will always have work in this town
and besides the police are stationed at the bridge
and they're preventing passage to higher ground
so let's pull up a bar stool and get ourselves a ring side seat
for one unnerving moment
they're gonna show the truth on tv

you can doubt anything
if you think about it long enough
cuz what happened always adjusts to fit
what happened after that
and it's hard to feel like you are free
when all you seem to do is referee
remember when it was just you and me
steppin' up to bat?

and win or lose
just that you choose this little war
is what kills you
and either/or it's that this war
is maybe also what thrills you

we thought we left possession behind
but truth is i was yours and you were mine
and now i've replayed a thousand times
exactly what was said
cuz nothing is as it appears
in the funhouse mirrors of your fears
on the roller coaster of all these years
with your hands above your head

and win or lose
just that you choose this little war
is what kills you
and either/or it's that this war
is maybe also what thrills you

i don't care how fast you run
just tell me, baby, that when you're done
with your little marathon
you still got cab fare home
cuz the finish line is a shifty thing
and what is life but reckoning
and, you know
you are still the song i sing
to myself
when i'm alone

and win or lose just that we choose
this little war is what kills us
and either/or it's that this war
is maybe also what thrills us

you can doubt anything
if you think about it long enough
cuz what happened always adjusts to fit
what happened after that
and it's hard to feel like you are free
when all you seem to do is referee
remember when it was just you and me
steppin' up to bat?

and win or lose
just that you choose this little war
is what kills you
and either/or it's that this war
is maybe also what thrills you

we thought we left possession behind
but truth is i was yours and you were mine
and now i've replayed a thousand times
exactly what was said
cuz nothing is as it appears
in the funhouse mirrors of your fears
on the roller coaster of all these years
with your hands above your head

and win or lose
just that you choose this little war
is what kills you
and either/or it's that this war
is maybe also what thrills you

i don't care how fast you run
just tell me, baby, that when you're done
with your little marathon
you still got cab fare home
cuz the finish line is a shifty thing
and what is life but reckoning
and, you know
you are still the song i sing
to myself
when i'm alone

and win or lose just that we choose
this little war is what kills us
and either/or it's that this war
is maybe also what thrills us

you can doubt anything
if you think about it long enough
cuz what happened always adjusts to fit
what happened after that
and it's hard to feel like you are free
when all you seem to do is referee
remember when it was just you and me
steppin' up to bat?

and win or lose
just that you choose this little war
is what kills you
and either/or it's that this war
is maybe also what thrills you

we thought we left possession behind
but truth is i was yours and you were mine
and now i've replayed a thousand times
exactly what was said
cuz nothing is as it appears
in the funhouse mirrors of your fears
on the roller coaster of all these years
with your hands above your head

and win or lose
just that you choose this little war
is what kills you
and either/or it's that this war
is maybe also what thrills you

i don't care how fast you run
just tell me, baby, that when you're done
with your little marathon
you still got cab fare home
cuz the finish line is a shifty thing
and what is life but reckoning
and, you know
you are still the song i sing
to myself
when i'm alone

and win or lose just that we choose
this little war is what kills us
and either/or it's that this war
is maybe also what thrills us

Words and music by Ani DiFranco

As dolls go I am broken
And you could just let that get us off the hook
But from under the umbrella of the unspoken
I see you giving me that look

Baby, you're right as rain about the benefits
But you might be wrong about the costs
And it feeds my heart that you came looking for me
But I'm thinkin I need to stay lost

So I won't say I saw you fibbing
Or jump-jigging across the floor
I won't say you walked me to my car
And draped your arm on my open door

I know my mind is made of matter
But I need to know exactly
What is the matter at it's core?
Because my heart is just a muscle
And simply put, it's sore

So never mind about the benefits
And never mind about the costs
That don't change the basic premises
In which I am surely lost

So I won't say I saw you fibbing
Or jump-jigging across the floor
I won't say you walked me to my car
And draped your arm on my open door