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cradling the softest, warmest part of you in my hand
feels like a little baby bird fallen from the nest i think that your body is something i understand i think that i'm happy, i think that i'm blessed i've got a lack of inhibition i've got a loss of perspective i've had a little bit to drink and it's making me think that i can jump ship and swim that the ocean will hold me that there's got to be more than this boat i'm in 'cuz they can call me crazy if i fail all the chance that i need is one-in-a-million and they can call me brilliant if i succeed gravity is nothing to me, moving at the speed of sound i'm just going to get my feet wet until i drown and i teeter between tired and really, really tired im wiped and im wired but i guess its just as well because i built my own empire out of car tires and chicken wire and i'm queen of my own compost heap and i'm getting used to the smell and i've got a lack of information but i got a little revelation and i'm climbing up on the railing trying not to look down i'm going to do my best swan dive in the shark-infested waters i'm gonna pull out my tampon and start splashing around 'cuz i don't care if they eat me alive i've got better things to do than survive i've got a memory of your warm skin in my hand and i've got a vision of blue sky and dry land i'm cradling the hardest, heaviest part of me in my hand the ship is pitching and heaving, my limbs are bobbing and weaving and i think this is what i understand i just need a couple vaccinations for my far-away vacation i'm going to go ahead boldly because a little bird told me that jumping is easy, that falling is fun right up 'til you hit the sidewalk, shivering, stunned and they can call me crazy if i fail all the chance that i need is one-in-a-million and they can call me brilliant if i succeed gravity is nothing to me moving at the speed of sound i'm just gonna get my feet wet until i drown... |
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the sky is grey
the sand is grey and the ocean is grey and i feel right at home in this stunning monochrome alone in my way i smoke and i drink and every time i blink i have a tiny dream but as bad as i am i'm proud of the fact that i'm worse than i seem what kind of paradise am i looking for? i've got everything i want and still i want more maybe some tiny shiny key will wash up on the shore you walk through my walls like a ghost on tv you penetrate me and my little pink heart is on its little brown raft floating out to sea and what can i say but i'm wired this way and you're wired to me and what can i do but wallow in you unintentionally what kind of paradise am i looking for? i've got everything i want and still i want more maybe some tiny shiny key will wash up on the shore regretfully i guess i've only got three simple things to say: why me? why this now? why this way? with overtones ringing and undertows pulling away under a sky that is grey on sand that is grey by an ocean that's grey what kind of paradise am i looking for? i've got everything i want and still i want more maybe some tiny shiny key will wash up on the shore |
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Fourteenth street and the garbage swirls like a cyclone
Three o'clock in the afternoon and I am going home F train is full of high school students So much shouting So much laughter Last night's underwear in my back pocket Sure sign of the morning after Take me home Take me home and leave me there Think I'm going to cry, I don't know why Think I'm going to sing myself a lullaby Feel free to listen Feel free to stare I live in New York New York the city that never shuts up In the daylight everything is so gory You can hear snatches of stranger's sorry stories And I moved there from Buffalo but that's nothing The TRICO plant moved to Mexico Left my uncle standing out in the cold Said there's your last paycheck have fun growing old Take me home Take me home and leave me there Think I'm going to cry, I don't know why Think I'm going to sing myself a lullaby Feel free to listen Feel free to stare Rockabye baby In the treetop When the wind blows Cradle will rock When the bough breaks The cradle will fall Down will come baby Cradle and all Youth is beauty Money is beauty Hell, beauty is beauty sometimes It's the luck of the draw It's the natural law It's a joke It's a crime I was bored You were bored It was a meeting of the minds Now it's three in the afternoon and I can't leave too soon Saying thank you, I had a nice time Take me home Take me home and leave me there Think I'm going to cry, I don't know why Think I'm going to sing myself a lullaby Feel free to listen Feel free to stare Maybe I'll live my whole life Just getting by Maybe I'll be discovered Maybe I'll be colonized You could try to train me like a pet You could try to teach me to behave But I'll tell you, if I haven't learned it yet You know, I ain't gonna sit, I ain't gonna stay Take me home Take me home and leave me there Think I'm going to cry, I don't know why Think I'm going to sing myself a lullaby Feel free to listen Feel free to stare |
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What what what what what did you think you were doing?
How how how how how did you think this would go? When when when when when you showed up on my radar Where where where where where did you think you would show? What what what what what do you make of this station How how how how how it pulls away from the train? When when when when when if at all will you realize Where where where where where do and done are the same? What what what what what now you're out in the open How how how how how do you think you can hide? When when when when when will you find some nice soft sand Where where where where where you can bury your pride? What what what what what do you want from this lifetime? How how how how how does your story line flow? When when when when when you finally get to the punch line Where where where where where will the applause sign go? And why why why why why don't you just take your bow 'cause who's gonna love you now? |
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the sun is setting on the century
and we armed to the teeth we're all working together now to make our lives mercifully brief schoolkids keep trying to teach us what guns are all about confuse liberty with weaponry and watch your kids act it out every year now like christmas some boy gets the milkfed suburban blues reaches for the available arsenal and saunters off to make the news and the women in the middle arelearning what poor women have always known that the edge is closer than you think whe your men bring the guns home look at where the profits are that's how you'll find the source of the big lie that you and i both know so well in the time it take this cultural death wish to run its course they're gonna make a pretty penny and then they're all going to hell he said the chickens all come home to roost yeah malcolm forecasted this flood are we really gonna sleep through another century while the rich profit off our blood? true it may take some doing to see this undoing through but in my humble opinion here's what i suggest we do open fire on hollywood open fire on MTV open fire on NBC and CBS and ABC open fire on the NRA and all the lies they told us along the way open fire on each weapons manufacturer while he's giving head to some republican senator and if i hear one more time about a fool's right to his tools of rage i'm gonna take all my friends and i'm gonna move to canada and we're gonna die of old age |
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you were so in love
that it was all you could talk about and i think i felt a little left out you were on cloud 9 all the time while i was levelling i was wringing my hands and you were revelling but then why shouldn't you? it was such a beautiful thing to do would that i could get me some of your yum yum delirium i could level off the ground that we stand on but with you down on bended knee always looking up at me that feeling of standing up together is gone and though i love you through all time and space my love always seems to take second place you were so in love that it was all you could talk about and i think i felt a little left out you were on cloud 9 all the time while i was levelling i was wringing my hands and you were revelling but then why shouldn't you? it was such a beautiful thing to do |
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they told you your music
could reach millions that the choice was up to you you told me they always pay for lunch and they believe in what i do and i wonder will you miss your old friends once you've proven what you're worth yeah i wonder when you're a big star will you miss the earth and i know you would always want more i know you would never be done 'cuz everyone is a fucking napoleon yeah everyone is a fucking napoleon and the next time that i saw you you were larger than life you came and you conquered you were doing alright you had an army of suits behind you and all you had to be was willing and i said i still make a pretty good living but you must make a killing a killing and i hope that you are happy i hope at least you are having fun 'cuz but everyone is a fucking napoleon yeah everyone is a fucking napoleon now you think, so that is the way it's gonna be that's what this is all about i think that that is the way it always was you chose not to notice until now yeah now that there's a problem you call me up to confide and you go on for over an hour 'bout each one that took you for a ride and i guess that you dialed my number 'cuz you thought for sure that i'd agree i said baby, you know i still love you but how dare you complain to me everyone is a fucking napoleon yeah everyone is a fucking napoleon |
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what's with that halo
hovering above that thick skull spare me if i do say so i think you're covering course there was nothing could have prepared me for the side effect of this dirty drug the way you punish me and then you shrug what's with that phone call baby it's like you're trying just trying to crush me do you feel stronger each time you push me dear did you tell your mom you carpet bombed before you left here and is it just the side effect of this dirty drug or does each apology sound more like a shrug are you at home now with your kitty cats are you just at home now with the way that you act do you split the rent there with all your secrets or do you just pretend to all your friends they're uninvited guests yes and when you want it tidy, tell me, can you still dispell me, sweep me neatly under the rug and does your conscience ever mention the way that you treat me or do you just fend it off with a..... |
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| 11. |
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Welcome to:
No amount of stoned makes you feel ok Welcome to: This year's alone - brought to you by christmas day Welcome to: The darkness into which prayin people pray It's quiet here except for this song Now that everybody's gone But hey Least you don't have to play along today Welcome to: Something like elation when you first open your eyes Just 'cause it means That you musta finally got to sleep last night Welcome to: The precipice between groundlessness and flight It's quiet here except for this song Now that everybody's gone But hey Least you don't have to play along today Besides which Welcome to: Taking the good stuff down off of the shelf And welcome to: The art of conversation with yourself Welcome to: Humming an unbroken tune All day long Yes it's quiet here But hey Least you don't have to play along today |
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i love you
and you love me and ain't that the way it's supposed to be? i swing my stick legs 'round at the root and pile drive each foot into a platform boot and i'm up and i'm out cuz i'm bouncing off the walls and i come when i'm called and you called i got a super-cute three-piece suit one piece for your body one piece for your smile one more little piece if you stay a while i gotta beeline double time leave my home sweet home for your honeycomb then i show up steady, ready and proud and i find i've forgotten how to talk out loud isn't it just like you to bring me to my knees in my brand new stockings while the cat is out with my tongue isn't it just like you to bring me to my knees in my brand new stockings love makes me feel so dumb |
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life used to be life-like
now it's more like show biz i wake up in the night and i don't know where the bathroom is and i don't know what town i'm in or what sky i am under and i wake up in the darkness and i don't have the will anymore to wonder everyone has a skeleton and a closet to keep it in and you're mine every song has a you a you that the singer sings to and you're it this time baby, you're it this time when i need to wipe my face i use the back of my hand and i like to take up space just because i can and i use my dress to wipe up my drink i care less and less what people think and you are so lame you always disappoint me it's kinda like our running joke but it's really not funny i just want you to live up to the image of you i create i see you and i'm so unsatisfied i see you and i dilate so i'll walk the plank and i'll jump with a smile if i'm gonna go down i'm gonna do it with style and you won't see me surrender you won't hear me confess 'cuz you've left me with nothing but i've worked with less and i learn every room long enough to make it to the door and then i hear it click shut behind me and every key works differently i forget every time and the forgetting defines me that's what defines me when i say you sucked my brain out the english translation is i am in love with you and it is no fun but i don't use words like love 'cuz words like that don't matter but don't look so offended you know, you should be flattered i wake up in the night in some big hotel bed my hands grope for the light my hands grope for my head the world is my oyster the road is my home and i know that i'm better off alone |
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thank you
for letting me stay here thank you for taking me in thank you for the beer and the food thank you for loaning me bus fare thank you for showing me around that was a very kind thing to do thank you for the use of the clean towel thank you for half of your bed we can sleep here like brother and sister, you said but you changed the rules in an hour or two and i don't know what you and your sisters do but please don't please stop this is not my obligation what does my body have to do with my gratitude? look at you little white lying for the purpose of justifying what you're trying to do i know that you feel my resistance i know that you heard what i said otherwise you wouldn't need the excuse thank you for letting me stay here thank you for taking me in i don't know where else i would have gone but i don't come and go like a pop song that you can play incessantly and then forget when it's gone you can't write me off and you don't turn me on so don't change the rules in an hour or two i don't know what you and your sisters do but please don't please stop this is not my obligation what does my body have to do with my gratitude? |
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it's rock paper scissors as to whether
i will get over you at all it's hand against hand and both hands are mine it's standing in a circular line which is not to say that i'm not also happy a happy meal with a surprise inside surprise surprise here's another bright light in your eyes exposing all the stuff you're not calculating enough to hide this melancholy that i carry makes me feel so grown up at my kitchen table doing shots of resignation i never thought i'd see the day when i would say i give up and break the stallions of my wildest expectations i do not want to know you this way surrounded by so much pain but how am i supposed to let go of you this way like a bird into the sky of my brain? i think i could accept all these dark colors as just part of some bigger color scheme if it wasn't for that drippy string quartet of sadness underscoring each smiling scene desire drags me right out of myself a gas-soaked rope tied to a piece of coal and i'm getting pretty good at looking at the bright side while the flames rip along the sand and swallow me whole |
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Squint your eyes and look closer
I'm not between you and your ambition I am a poster girl with no poster I am 32 flavors and then some And I'm beyond your peripheral vision So you might want to turn your head 'Cause someday you are gonna get hungry And eat most of the words you just said Both my parents taught me about goodwill And I have done well by their names Just the kindness I've lavished on strangers Is more than I can explain Still there's many who've turned out their porch lights Just so I would think they were not home And hid in the dark of their windows Till I'd passed and left them alone Hey, yo, hey Oh, hey, yo, hey, yo Oh, hey, yo, hey Oh, hey, yo, hey, yo God help you if you are an ugly girl Course, too pretty is also your doom 'Cause everyone harbors a secret hatred For the prettiest girl in the room And God help you if you are a phoenix And you dare to rise up from the ash A thousand eyes will smolder with jealousy While you are just flying past And I'll never try to give my life meaning By demeaning you But I would like to state for the record I did everything that I could do I'm not saying that I am a saint I just don't want to live that way No, I will never be a saint But I will always say Squint your eyes and look closer I'm not between you and your ambition I am a poster girl with no poster I am 32 flavors and then some And I'm beyond your peripheral vision So you might want to turn your head 'Cause someday you might find you are starving And eating all of the words that you said Oh, oh, hey, yo Oh, hey, yo Oh, hey, yo, hey, yo Oh, hey, yo Mm, mm, mm, mm Mm, mm, mm, mm Oh, hey, yo Oh, hey, yo Oh, hey, yo, hey, yo Oh, hey, yo |
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I am not a pretty girl
That is not what I do I ain't no damsel in distress And I don't need to be rescued So put me down, punk Wouldn't you prefer a maiden fair? Isn't there a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere? I am not an angry girl But it seems like I've got everyone fooled Every time I say something they find hard to hear They chalk it up to my anger And never to their own fear Imagine you're a girl Just trying to finally come clean Knowing full well they'd prefer you were dirty And smiling And I am sorry But I am not a maiden fair And I am not a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere And generally, my generation Wouldn't be caught dead working for the man And generally I agree with them Trouble is you gotta have youself An alternate plan And I have earned my disillusionment I have been working all of my life And I am a patriot I have been fighting the good fight And what if there are no damsels in distress What if I knew that and I called your bluff? Don't you think every kitten figures out how to get down, Whether or not you ever show up? I am not a pretty girl I don't really want to be a pretty girl No, I want to be more than a pretty girl. |
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Yes,
Us people are just poems We're 90% metaphor With a leanness of meaning Approaching hyper-distillation And once upon a time We were moonshine Rushing down the throat of a giraffe Yes, rushing down the long hallway Despite what the p.a. announcement says Yes, rushing down the long hall Down the long stairs In a building so tall That it will always be there Yes, it's part of a pair There on the bow of Noah's ark The most prestigious couple Just kickin back parked Against a perfectly blue sky On a morning beatific In its Indian summer breeze On the day that America Fell to its knees After strutting around for a century Without saying thank you Or please And the shock was subsonic And the smoke was deafening Between the setup and the punch line 'Cause we were all on time for work that day We all boarded that plane for to fly And then while the fires were raging We all climbed up on the window sill And then we all held hands And jumped into the sky And every borough looked up when it heard the first blast And then every dumb action movie was summarily surpassed And the exodus uptown by foot and motorcar Looked more like war than anything I've seen so far So far So far So fierce and ingenious A poetic specter so far gone That every jackass newscaster was struck dumb and stumbling Over 'Oh my God' and Tthis is unbelievable' and on and on And I'll tell you what, while we're at it You can keep the Pentagon Keep the propaganda Keep each and every tv That's been trying to convince me To participate In some prep school punk's plan to perpetuate retribution Perpetuate retribution Even as the blue toxic smoke of our lesson in retribution Is still hanging in the air And there's ash on our shoes And there's ash in our hair And there's a fine silt on every mantle From Hell's Kitchen to Brooklyn And the streets are full of stories Sudden twists and near misses And soon every open bar is crammed to the rafters With tales of narrowly averted disasters And the whiskey is flowin Like never before As all over the country Folks just shake their heads And pour So here's a toast to all the folks that live in Palestine, Afghanistan, Iraq, El Salvador Here's a toast to the folks living on the Pine Ridge Reservation Under the stone cold gaze of Mt. Rushmore Here's a toast to all those nurses and doctors Who daily provide women with a choice Who stand down a threat the size of Oklahoma City Just to listen to a young woman's voice Here's a toast to all the folks on death row right now Awaiting the executioner's guillotine Who are shackled there with dread and can only escape into their heads To find peace in the form of a dream, peace in the form of a dream 'Cause take away our Playstations And we are a third world nation Under the thumb of some blue blood royal son Who stole the Oval Office and that phony election I mean It don't take a weatherman To look around and see the weather Jeb said he'd deliver Florida, folks And boy, did he ever And we hold these truths to be self evident: #1 George W. Bush is not President #2 America is not a true democracy #3 The media is not fooling me 'Cause I am a poem heeding hyper-distillation I've got no room for a lie so verbose I'm looking out over my whole human family And I'm raising my glass in a toast Here's to our last drink of fossil fuels May we vow to get off of this sauce Shoo away the swarms of commuter planes And find that train ticket we lost 'Cause once upon a time, the line followed the river And peeked into all the backyards And the laundry was waving The graffiti was teasing us From brick walls and bridges We were rolling over ridges Through valleys Under stars I dream of touring like Duke Ellington In my own railroad car I dream of waiting on the tall blonde wooden benches In a grand station aglow with grace And then standing out on the platform And feeling the air on my face Give back the night its distant whistle Give the darkness back its soul Give the big oil companies the finger, finally And relearn how to rock-n-roll Yes, the lessons are all around us, and the truth is waiting there So it's time to pick through the rubble, clean the streets and clear the air Get our government to pull its big dick out of the sand Of someone else's desert Put it back in its pants And quit the hypocritical chants of Freedom forever 'Cause when one lone phone rang In two thousand and one At ten after nine On nine one one Which is the number we all called When that lone phone rang right off the wall Right off our desk and down the long hall Down the long stairs In a building so tall That the whole world turned Just to watch it fall And while we're at it Remember the first time around? The bomb? The Ryder truck? The parking garage? The princess that didn't even feel the pea? Remember joking around in our apartment on Avenue D? Can you imagine how many paper coffee cups would have to change their design Following a fantastical reversal of the New York skyline?! It was a joke At the time And that was just a few years ago So let the record show That the FBI was all over that case That the plot was obvious and in everybody's face And scoping that scene Religiously The CIA Or is it KGB? Committing countless crimes against humanity With this kind of eventuality As its excuse For abuse after expensive abuse And it didn't have a clue Look, another window to see through Way up here On the 104th floor Look Another key Another door 10% literal 90% metaphor 3000 some poems disguised as people On an almost too perfect day Must be more than pawns In some asshole's passion play So now it's your job And it's my job To make it that way To make sure they didn't die in vain Sshhhhhh.... Baby, listen Hear the train? |
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you can doubt anything
if you think about it long enough cuz what happened always adjusts to fit what happened after that and it's hard to feel like you are free when all you seem to do is referee remember when it was just you and me steppin' up to bat? and win or lose just that you choose this little war is what kills you and either/or it's that this war is maybe also what thrills you we thought we left possession behind but truth is i was yours and you were mine and now i've replayed a thousand times exactly what was said cuz nothing is as it appears in the funhouse mirrors of your fears on the roller coaster of all these years with your hands above your head and win or lose just that you choose this little war is what kills you and either/or it's that this war is maybe also what thrills you i don't care how fast you run just tell me, baby, that when you're done with your little marathon you still got cab fare home cuz the finish line is a shifty thing and what is life but reckoning and, you know you are still the song i sing to myself when i'm alone and win or lose just that we choose this little war is what kills us and either/or it's that this war is maybe also what thrills us |
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when i was four years old
they tried to test my i.q. they showed me a picture of 3 oranges and a pear they said, which one is different? it does not belong they taught me different is wrong but when i was 13 years old i woke up one morning thighs covered in blood like a war like a warning that i live in a breakable takeable body an ever increasingly valuable body that a woman had come in the night to replace me deface me see, my body is borrowed yeah, i got it on loan for the time in between my mom and some maggots i don't need anyone to hold me i can hold my own i got highways for stretchmarks see where i've grown i sing sometimes like my life is at stake 'cause you're only as loud as the noises you make i'm learning to laugh as hard as i can listen 'cause silence is violence in women and poor people if more people were screaming then i could relax but a good brain ain't diddley if you don't have the facts we live in a breakable takeable world an ever available possible world and we can make music like we can make do genius is in a back beat backseat to nothing if you're dancing especially something stupid like i.q. for every lie i unlearn i learn something new i sing sometimes for the war that i fight 'cause every tool is a weapon - if you hold it right. |
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in the jukebox of her memory
the list of names flips by and stops and she closes her eyes and smiles as the record drops then she drinks herself up and out of her kitchen chair and she dances out of time as slow as she can sway as long as she can say this dance is mine this dance is mine her hair bears silent witness to the passing of time tattoos like mile markers map the distance she has come winning some, losing some but she says my sister still calls every sunday night after the rates go down and i still can never manage to say anything right and my whole life blew up and now it's all coming down she says, leave me alone tonight i just wanna stay home she fills the pot with water and she drops in the bone she says, i've got a darkness that i have to feed i got a sadness that grows up around me like a weed and i'm not hurting anyone i'm just spiraling in and then she closes her eyes and hears the song begin again she appreciates the phone calls the consoling cards and such she appreciates all the people who come by and try to pull her back in touch they try to hold the lid down tightly and they try to shake well but the oil and water they just wanna separate themselves she drinks herself up and out of her kitchen chair and she dances out of time as slow as she can sway as long as she can say this dance is mine this dance is mine this dance is mine |
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How can I go home
With nothing to say? I know you're going to look at me that way And say "What did you do out there? And what did you decide?" You said you needed time And you had time You are a china shop And I am a bull You are really good food And I am full I guess everything is timing I guess everything's been said So I am coming home with an empty head You'll say "Did they love you or what?" I'll say "They love what I do The only one who really loves me is you" And you'll say "Girl, did you kick some butt?" And I'll say "I don't really remember But my fingers are sore And my voice is too" You'll say "It's really good to see you" You'll say "I missed you horribly" You'll say "Let me carry that Give that to me" And you will take the heavy stuff And you will drive the car And I'll look out the window and make jokes About the way things are How can I go home With nothing to say? I know you're going to look at me that way And say "What did you do out there? And what did you decide?" You said you needed time and you had time You had time... You had time... You had time... You had time... |
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