Novembers Doom

How many times have I fallen before you
How much longer can I go on
To raise to my feet, to try this game again
I often point fingers of blame

If only my mother knew the real me
Her heart would break, for I am shame
Not the strong man she raised from birth
A coward, a child, and a scared soul

In my dreams, I can fly away
And look back through tears of pain
Even if I were to never awake
I would still have my downtime

If only my mother knew the real me
Her heart would break, for I am shame
Not the strong man she raised from birth


A coward, a child, and a scared soul

A sweet embrace from honest love
Just won't be enough this time
If I had the cure, to save myself
I would then know how you feel

If only my mother knew the real me
Her heart would break, for I am shame
Not the strong man she raised from birth
A coward, a child, and a scared soul

I am broken.
In spirit, body, and mind
Forever cold to faith in life
Mother of night, embrace me
I have not forgotten
Looking back on the years of last
With so much pain to bare
I am broken

Nights forgotten its son of brave
And turned her back on bitterness
Torn is my duality
Judging the force of things yet old
Trivia in forsaken thoughts
Of tomorrow's crushing blow

A calming plea, follow the day

Two fold, I stand to ache
Given to me by pitiful life
Desperate time, to pass in stride
How does anyone ever know?
False dreams, and lesser faith

Can you look me in the eyes


And tell me everything's all right?
If we talk about tomorrow
How can I stop your tears?

Separation of life and mind
Comfort, the quest for time
Suffer day, and hallowed night
In dark realms to betray
Left here for the devouring dogs
To feast upon my very pride
One thing I will never forget
That I am only a man
And I am broken

Failure I cannot fix
False hope for nothing
This is the life I lead
And tomorrow will not change

I can't control when I was afraid
So far away, from any choice I have
Here in this day, I continue to fear
Simple as I am, It's always on my mind

Somewhere inside, a voice is heard
To remind me that I have lost control

I have lost my will, to continue this way
With every waking breath, I decide...
How I live my life is far from normal days
See my downward fall, and allow me to lie

Somewhere inside, a voice is heard
To remind me that I have lost control

I give into my life, and color it with black
I listen to my heart, and hear nothing


If every day is cold, and the skies have turned to gray
Only then will I be happy with this pain

I have come to realize, my trials are before me
These are the rules set forth, to be lost in a day

I can't control when I was afraid
So far away, from any choice I have
Here in this day, I continue to fear
Simple as I am, to be lost in a day

My bride to comfort me
when all seems lost
A kiss upon my brow
to soften my suffering
She means so well
I haven't the heart
To tell her
my smile was forced.

My mother cries for me when no one will
Her words of compassion swell my eyes
"It's not fair this has happened to you,
And I'd do anything to take away your pain"

My rage to help me through the day


And visions of black to cure my loss
I taunt the pain to prove it's real
And greet my facade with a grin

Look what your God has made me
Placing spikes within my flesh
A crown of nails for my sunken head
To shy away from this freak

On the days you long for me
And the cold nights of grey

(Hear me)

I ask you to forgive me
And bow my head in shame

(Feel me)

I promise, I will never leave you
I will not go on without you
If the light calls upon me
I will remain, waiting for you

(Live for me)

I've never felt so empty before
I never cared more for us



(Pray for me)

I promise, I will never leave you
I will not go on without you
If the light calls upon me
I will remain, waiting for you

Somewhere along the days of my life
I found my faith in you

(Cry for me)

In just one breath
Your dreams will fade
A moment in time
For fear to embrace

The future... is my enemy
Long days.... and endless nights

Pain awakes my sleep
And ends in a silent barrage of calm

Look at me though jaded eyes
Forever see the mask I wear
Never feel pity for me
It's the way my life lives

Beaten by the only life I know
Forced upon the spirit seed


I only wish I had the strength
To say goodbye

At what time did you turn your back?
I pay for this with every breath
And all you do is preach through man
Of how merciful you can be

Then you shall not fail
For every time you close your eyes
I'll be there to greet you

(life)
I long for days like this
My heart pounds when you are near
The gift of life
Treasure it, for it is pure
Embrace it with all your heart

Not a thousand years of pain
Would be worth the loss of this
I hold for you a special gift
And on this day, a new life begins

(torn)
Facade the day of forest green
And calm my breath with words of plight
A question I ponder this hour
The light for me, or shadows engulf

(death)
I am the answers you seek
You stand before me
And I see your sorrow
Even now, in your agony
You can have your doubt
For one last time

(torn)
Do I make make the sacrifice?
To walk among the restless souls?
How can I let this go on?
Torn between love and life
All is dead in my eyes

(death)
Close your eyes and welcome the truth
Innocence is so sweet


For only the aging of the flesh
Shall rain upon the sorrows of life

Admire this touch of heaven
Before it fades.
I remember days of old,
And through your grief, one stands clear.
I can see you forge a smile

All these flowers are turning to snow
For all is lost in your heart
It's only her love that keeps you alive
Now's the time for your pain to end

(life)
How can I ever live without you?
This all seems so perfect
So perfect, until I dream of you
And your smile is my sunshine

You deserve more then this
Your saviour has come
A strong soul to carry on
To take you home
I need you here with me
Follow me now
To pick me up when I fall
Before the sunlight fades

I just want to close my eyes
So I can forget about today
Forget about what lies tomorrow
And only take place in the realm of paradise
To be beaten each day
And lower my head
As if its my own fault
Forgotten about as night falls

Restless nights that are filled with guilt
And invite me into their empty embrace
I never saw this coming
And I now know that i'm not alone
I can only wish that i'm the last
And no one will suffer my fate
It would take an eternity in hell
For my heart to rest in peace.

To strike down this hate filled soul
And give back the pain you've caused


Would only satisfy
My craving for blood.

I will see you in the end
And I will laugh at your pain

And I pray you suffer long
And all the angels turn their backs
From the site of your pitiful face
No God will save your soul
For there is no love for you
You left that all behind
The day you learned to fucking speak

Solid shades of passions lie
With countless eyes to stare your sleep
Wallow in terror of nights fetal embrace
Cold tongues taste the fear
A dark vision to scare my soul
And shy away as the madness calls upon me
To close my eyes at the end of day
Welcome dark clad armies of fear
More then novels have told my tale
And campfire dreams that warm the soul
With every moment of every night
The shadows dance the walls
And I know she looks upon me from afar
To close my eyes at the end of day
Evokes dark fields for brilliance
Her cold smile haunts the after thought
A fate for us all to be taken away
From the empty days of hope, deny the darkness


Follow my voice, we'll run far away from here
If only to hide, to escape this life
And live forever, forever in the sun
For all the nights I lie awake
And stare into the void
Just once I wish to grasp
Some glimmer of hope
A cowards reign
The last to know
Forward, down
And through my eyes

Embrace the silence
And listen to me
Our time is short
And my words are pure
For every song the angels sing
And for every leaf that falls
I will be thinking of you
And I'll blow you a kiss
I used to dream of the blue in your eyes
Now my dreams are color blind
Clenching my fist to crush this pain
Its always the hate in my smile that devours me


Transcending down far beneath my means
A final breath of you to keep with me
Infantile tears are melting the morning snow
And shiver I will, for the heat in you is gone
Never forget to smile
As you look upon this world
somewhere I'll remain alone
thinking of the morning past

Awaken my soul and open my eyes
Show me the journey and feed my mind
Take me away to lands of green
Forever falling through Gods black veil
Darker spirits than this, have fallen past my eyes
Even through this twilight, my smile lies to me
I can smell the scent of dark and cold winters frost
Deeper in the void we look searching for a golden glance
The jealous Sun is burning for me
So many years my heaven has wept
25 winters of mourn
In darkness I reach out for light


Sighs from above
Rain down on me
Pitiful heart
Always alone
Face down I lay, I'm forced to lick the earth
Cold rain drops far, covering me, soothing my pain
Swelling eyes, fill with blood, blinding me, visions of red
Bitter sweet, taste of life, broken man, I spit on your gift

Dawn Breaks
And here we walk eluding the night
Telling you tales of how I am lost
You know things now that I can't explain
And I must avoid your beg for words

I can see by the look in your eyes
The trust you once had is gone

I can't hide from what I am
Come with me and leave this behind
Close your eyes and dream of me
Waste not your time for now dawn breaks

Shield myself from the tears on your cheek
Open my arms to greet your embrace

Hold me closely and absorb my warmth
Let me go now and tremble alone



And here we walk eluding the night
Telling you tales of how I am lost
You know things now that I can't explain
And I must avoid your beg for words

I can't hide from what I am
Come with me and leave this behind
Close your eyes and dream of me
Waste not your time for now dawn breaks

Together we can hear
The screaming butterfly
United as one
Gods will fall to their knees

How many times have I fallen before you
How much longer can I go on
To raise to my feet, to try this game again
I often point fingers of blame

If only my mother knew the real me
Her heart would break, for I am shame
Not the strong man she raised from birth
A coward, a child, and a scared soul

In my dreams, I can fly away
And look back through tears of pain
Even if I were to never awake
I would still have my downtime

If only my mother knew the real me
Her heart would break, for I am shame
Not the strong man she raised from birth


A coward, a child, and a scared soul

A sweet embrace from honest love
Just won't be enough this time
If I had the cure, to save myself
I would then know how you feel

If only my mother knew the real me
Her heart would break, for I am shame
Not the strong man she raised from birth
A coward, a child, and a scared soul

Born upon angelic dirt
we crawl from filth to rise
Speak my name for the sake of life
For this creed will slowly turn
Light escapes this shell of mine
The pale haunt departure
A dying wish to rise again
And leave behind a scarecrows fate
Only those who have suffered long
Can find the light within the shadows
A first hand trial of mislead hope
For this is the day of our wake
Light escapes this shell of mine
The pale haunt departure
A dying wish to rise again
And leave behind a scarecrows fate


So I rise above to look below
and see the shedding coil
The ascension process to reunite
my passion for life through pain
Your trust in faith
Light escapes this shell of mine
The pale haunt departure
A dying wish to rise again
And leave behind a scarecrows fate

I'm sorry you will never know me,
But know I always loved you.
Will you remember when I kept you safe?
Will you remember when I made you smile?
Once again the daylight fades, and I'm swallowed by the moon
Will tomorrow bring a new day of hope?
Will this experience fill you with rage?
The enemy time, knocks at my home
I can no longer hide
Please forgive me, I never meant to leave
But know that I had you as my final thought
Will you remember when I held you tight?
Will you remember the sound of my voice?
Once again the daylight fades, and I'm swallowed by the moon
Will this experience scar your fragile mind?
Will you remember when we would both laugh?
Memories is all that you have
And I'm sorry I failed you in life
I wanted more for you then I could provide
Be strong and make your mother proud


Don't cry... The tears in your eyes
My time... To say my goodbyes
Heaven waits... My soul to arise
Torture, torture... My pain finally dies
Will you remember that I tried my best?
Will you remember the father I was?
Once again the daylight fades, and I'm swallowed by the moon
Will you look back and smile for me?
Will you remember me when I have gone?
Memories is all that you have
And I'm sorry I failed you in life
I wanted more for you then I could provide
Be strong and make your mother proud

I remember yesterday
The rain fell to the earth
For I dream of your arrival
And color my dark world with faith
Knowing you would be the strong one
To keep my focus in close view
I thank the heavens above
For the angel beside me today
The guardian of my sanity
The one who will save my soul
If I ever doubt the faith I hold
I only need one smile from you
And an autumn reflection
will deliver me to your arms
Someday you will understand
How much you mean to me
for every day that passes me by
I long for the person you will become
I thank the heavens above


For the angel beside me today
The guardian of my sanity
The one who will save my soul
If I ever doubt the faith I hold
I only need one smile from you
And an autumn reflection
will deliver me to your arms
I am stronger now
Since you came into my life
With a thought of your smile
I remember yesterday

It's all so clear to me now
A fraction of the man I used to be
For every breath I take draws in the fear
Only I know that the worst is yet to come
I live in a dark world, where no light shines through
I carry this burden with every step I take
Thrust myself into a new days end
And focus on the hour glass, to help pass the time
Day to day I push myself on
My facade can fool the strongest mind
And my loved ones can only watch from afar
A single mirror to view the void
Tragic yesterdays, and unseen futures sleep
Footprints in the blood from my wounded heart
My dark world is where I call home
Until the day comes, and the light calls my name


My arcane cell is covered in resent
I never asked for any of this
I follow the path which leads me to nothing
Searching for my smile I lost long ago
I stand alone in the company of none
Cheated by reality, philosopher of the gray
A brave inner child stands strong in refuse
A treasure of impurity will find a way to breed

Heaven is so far away from this Hell, Carried by the wings of shadows pain
Why did you turn your back, And leave me without your grace
Fallen so far away from the light, Courage will no longer be by my side
I stand here all alone, Waiting for you to see my need
I'll give my life for you, You'll see the fallen man
Heaven is so far away from this Hell, Carried by the wings of shadows pain
Why did you turn your back, And leave me without your grace
Fallen so far away from the light, Courage will no longer be by my side
I stand here all alone, Waiting for you to see my need
I'll give my life for you, You'll see the fallen man
I had trust in you, no more lies, I end this now, and walk away
So pathetic it's come to this, If you only could see my side
I live with this every day, and the struggle overwhelms me
For the loveless, And for my wake
Only when I close my eyes, And the day draws to an end
Thoughts of you stronger then me, increase my faith in hate
For the child, And for my heart


Only when I close my eyes, And the day draws to an end
Thoughts of you stronger then me, Increase my faith in hate
Always dreaming of better days, Since cast out from your sight
I'll live with the life I lead, And smile that you're no more
Why did you turn your back, And leave me without your grace
Fallen so far away from the light, Courage will no longer be by my side
I stand here all alone, Waiting for you to see my need
I'll give my life for you, You'll see the fallen man
I'll give my life for you, You'll see the fallen man