Walter Flakus

You are all I am, you are all I ever want to be
I think of you
A solitary cry echoes through my throat and through my mind
I think of you

I think I woke up screaming
I had a dream that you still loved me
I think I woke up screaming
I think I woke up screaming again

For hours I'll just stare at my ceiling at nothing at all
and think of you
The candlelight through bells make shadows just like roses in my mind
and I think of you

I think I woke up screaming
I had a dream that you still loved me
I think I woke up screaming
I think I woke up screaming again

Could this last forever?
Or will I die?
Could this last forever?
Or will I die?
Just can I die?

Maybe I could try to take a bath and drink a little wine
and think of you
But probably I'll lie naked on the floor by candlelight
and I'll think of you

I think I woke up screaming
I had a dream that you still loved me
I think I woke up screaming
I think I woke up screaming again
I think I woke up screaming
I had a dream that you still loved me
I think I woke up screaming
I think I woke up screaming again

I believed that love was sacred
As I dove blindly into her sea
You see, that warm embrace felt more like drowning
As endless waves crashed over me
She was an insatiable black hole
Feeding off my mind and off my soul
I found love humilating
Sick and desperate need that drives me
God I hope I'm never feel again
But I've never been loved by an angel
I never felt anything so pure
But I've never been loved by an angel
Until tonight, when your heaven filled my world
She showed me love could lift me higher
And with a kiss she repaired these broken wings
She revived my fading spirit
Restored my faith in everything
I have never felt I had a home
Even in a crowd I felt alone
I've almost given up on life I believed that I'm alive
I never thought I'm ever feel again
But I've never been loved by an angel
I never felt anything so pure
But I've never been loved by an angel
Until tonight, when your heaven filled my world
I believed in nothing
But you believe in me
I thought that life was worthless
But you taught me I was strong
God I've never been loved by an angel
I never felt anything so pure
God I've never been loved by an angel
Until tonight, when your heaven filled my world
Until tonight, when your heaven filled my world

Every time I think of you
I feel shot right through with a bolt of blue
It's no problem of mine but it's a problem I find
Living a life that I can't leave behind
There's no sense in telling me
The wisdom of a fool won't set you free
But that's the way that it goes
And it's what nobody knows
While every day my confusion grows
Every time I see you falling
I get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for that final moment
You'll say the words that I can't say

I feel fine and I feel good
I'm feeling like I never should
Whenever I get this way, I just don't know what to say
Why can't we be ourselves like we were yesterday
I'm not sure what this could mean
I don't think you're what you seem
I do admit to myself
That if I hurt someone else
Then I'll never see just what we're meant to be
Every time I see you falling
I get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for that final moment
You'll say the words that I can't say

Tomorrow came too soon
I barely made it through today
Still empty inside
I guess that nothing's really changed
I'm still afraid to feel
Cause I cannot take the pain
I'm still afraid to feel
Afraid to loose someone again
I wish that somehow I could leave my past behind
My fears behind
If I could only breathe you in
If I could only breathe you in
If I could only breathe you in
Every drop of you
Guess it's time to face the truth
And admit my past mistakes
Come to terms with all that's wrong with me
And all the things I'll never be
Why am I afraid to feel?
Afraid of what is true?
Why am I afraid to feel?
When all I really want is you
To taste your skin, to share your thoughts
Could never be enough for me
If I could only breathe you in
If I could only breathe you in
If I could only breathe you in
Every drop of you
If I could only breathe you in
If I could only breathe you in
If I could only breathe you in
Every drop of you
Of you

Late last night I tripped in
violent shades of green
1000 voiceless faces were chasing me
I ran through the air as thick as glue
Through night as black as hate my spirit fled
Through branches filled with thorns
my eyes bled and bled
How could I ever hope to win this race
When everytime I close my eyes I see your face

It just can't happen here

So much of me is you
I don't know just who
I am

Now I just can't believe
in myself or in anything

And this is what you take from me
And this is what you take from me
And this is what you take from me
And this is what you take from me

I gave you my soul
I gave you control
of me

Now I just can't believe
in myself or in anything

And this is what you take from me
And this is what you take from me
And this is what you take from me
And this is what you take from me

Can't you just believe
"you are my everything"

And this is what you take from me
And this is what you take from me
( Repeat to the point of stupidity... )

I'm feeling that weight of the world and It's crushing me
I'm feeling the weight of everyday life And it's crushing me
How much more will it take? How much more until it breaks me?
This world...is crushing me
I'm feeling the hate of the world and it's crashing me
I'm feeling the hate of everyday life And it's crushing me
How much more will it take?
How much more until it breaks me?
This world is crushing me

I'm feeling the hate of the world and it's crashing me
I swallow the hate, betrayed and lies
Swallow it whole and shove it deep down inside of me
I'm feeling the weight of the world and it's crushing me

I swallow the hate, betrayed and lies
Swallow it whole and shove it deep down inside of me
How much more will it take?
How much more until it breaks me?
This world is crushing me

There are times when I'm just a shell
When I do not feel anything for anyone
All I feel is hollow and bruised
Used up and misused
Forced to be someone I don't want to be
Have I failed somehow or some way
Will the weight of today finally pull me down to drown
In the depths of despair
Where I am alone
Except for my rage

My rage
My pain
I hate my darkest days
My rage
My pain
I hate my darkest days
My rage
My pain
I hate my darkest days
My rage
My pain
I hate my darkest days
My darkest days

I keep breaking all the promises
That I keep making to myself
You'd think by now that I'd be over this
Instead I'm feeling sorry for myself

So why does everything feel so desperate now
I should be feeling so alive
But it feels like something's missing
Something's wrong somehow
It feels like something
Deep inside has died

I keep breaking all the promises
That I keep making to myself
But the promises mean nothing to me anymore

Circling the drain...
Spiraling to hell...
So why do I feel desperate now
Why do I feel like dying
Why do I feel desperate now
Why do I feel desperate now

You seduce me, lonely in your hell
Naked and hungry, I crawl into your cell...
A virtual drugstore is piled on your bed
I can't resist with your tongue inside my head...

How can everything be justified by you?

You get off watching me bleed...
You get off on feeding my disease
This time will be perfect you explain
But your tounge's as deadly as a needle in my vein...

How can everything be justified by you?
How can my demise be justified by you?

I'm so tired of living for your touch
I'm tired of needing you so much

How can everything be justified by you?
When did I decide to be crucified by you?
How can everything be justified by you?
By you...

The more I feel
The more I die
Nothing to give
Nothing inside
Everything I touch I break
Everything I touch I break
Everything I touch I break

I scratch and tear
Until it bleeds
I do not want
I only need
I only need
I only need

Everything I touch I break
Everything I touch I break
Everything I touch I break
Everything I touch I break
Everything I touch I break
Everything I touch I break

How Can I Hold On (Dog Attack)
Back when you were my life
You gave me something that I could live for
Now everything's changed
And you're gone
But I'm still here waiting

I'm tangled and broken
Left scattered on the floor
Its useless now
There pieces
Can never make me whole
This is where it falls apart
You wither
You blister
I watch you burn and peal
It's not like you
Can save me
It's not like you even care
This is where it falls apart

I feel helpless as my everything comes
Crashing down on me
This is where it falls apart
This is where it falls apart

So this is where I say goodbye
This is where my story ends
And if there's one thing that I've learned from life
It's that it gets you in the end

So goodbye my friend
Goodbye
So goodbye my friend
Goodbye

I know you've grown to hate me
Even more than you have grown to hate yourself
But has it really made a difference sharing all that hate with
someone else
Please tell me are you really happy?
Do you think he's really worth the pain?
Tell me are you really happy?
Did you simply throw our life away
Just to be unhappy?
Does he worship and adore you
Does he make you feel so beautifully complete?
Is your life so much better now?
Or do the same old demons haunt your sleep?
Please tell me are you really happy?
Do you think he's really worth the pain?
Tell me are you really happy now?
Did you simply throw our life away
Just to be unhappy
Just to be unhappy?
Is he everything you've dreamed of?
I imagine he is so much more than me
You know I tried to make you happy
But I believe you thrive on misery
So please tell me are you really happy?
Do you think he's really worth the pain?
Tell me are you really happy?
Did you simply throw our life away
Just to be unhappy
Just to be unhappy
Just to be unhappy

Haunting Me
by Stabbing Westward



Everywhere I go I see your face
Every sound I hear is
the sound of your voice
Why are you haunting me
Why are you haunting me
Why can't I let you go
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?

Everything about me is a lie
At least it seems that way
when I look in your eyes
The truth scares the shit out of me
Whoever said love is real
and love is blind
has never felt the way that I do

What does it matter?
What's done is done
and I should get on with my life
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?

Well, I don't know what it means
But I can't seem to make myself forget
Was it something that you said
Was it all the guilt inside my head

Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?
Why are you haunting me?

Everywhere I go I see your face
Every sound I hear is the sound of your voice
Why are you haunting me
Why are you haunting me
Why can't I let you go?

Why are you haunting me...

So everything about me is a lie
At least it feels that way
When I look in your eyes now

The truth scares the shit out of me
Who ever said love is real and love is blood
Has never felt the way that I feel

What does it matter
What's done is done and I should
Get on with my life

Why are you haunting me...

Well I don't know what it is
But I can't seem to make myself forget
Was it something that you said
Or is it all the guilt inside my head

Why are you haunting me...

I can't hide it, I can't fight it
When every nerve is crying out for release
I can't recapture
The rapture
That passion that is burning inside me
I've lost so much
Chasing the perfect high
I've lost so much
I've never been as high as I was with you
Never been so high
I've never been as high as I was with you
I finally realized that's a perfect high
That's a perfect high
This hunger consumed me
I lost my soul as you came rushing in my veins
A pathetic little junkie
But I'm the whore that needs it one last time
I've lost so much
Chasing the perfect high
I've lost so much
I've never been as high as I was with you
Never been so high
I've never been as high as I was with you
I finally realized that's a perfect high
That's a perfect high
I've never been as high as I was with you
Never been so high
I've never been as high as I was with you
I finally realized that's a perfect high
That's a perfect high
That's a perfect high
That's a perfect high
That's a perfect high

With nothing to hold on to
Why should I hold on
When there's nothing to hold on to
Sex made me feel alive
But now I'm so bored with mindless passion
Drugs were somewhere to hide
But they've left me feeling cold and empty

How can I hold on
With nothing to hold on to
Why should I hold on
When there's nothing to hold on to

I thought you were my friend
That you were someone that I could turn to
Now I realize
That you were a friend when you needed something

How can I hold on
With nothing to hold on to
Why should I hold on
When there's nothing to hold on to
How can I hold on
With nothing to hold on to
Why should I hold on
When there's nothing to hold on to

I'm such an asshole
God, I'm such a stain
I just keep fucking up again and again
I Don't Believe I Don't Believe
That I could be so stupid and so naive
I Don't Believe I Don't Believe
That there is nothing, nothing left for me
You crawled into my mind
when you crawled into my bed
Said everyhting I've ever longed to hear
So perfect, so alive,
once inside you sucked me dry
Used me up and left me here for dead
I don't believe
That I could be so stupid and so naive
I don't believe
That there is nothing, nothing left for me
I crave it desperately, a cancer eating me
An addiction too intense to be denied
Worthless, I'm a whore,
crawling back for more
It's pathertic how I feed off this abuse
I don't believe
That I could be so stupid and so naive
I don't believe
That there is nothing, nothing left for me

You told me that you loved me
And I believed, you loved me
You swore that you loved me, and I believed
Now I know it was a lie

I don't believe
That I could be so stupid and so naive
I don't believe
That there is nothing, nothing left for me
I don't believe
That I could be so stupid and so naive
I don't believe
That there is nothing, nothing left for me

Do you ever wonder where we would be
if we had tried a little harder
It seems like yesterday that
we were making plans for the future
But it's been so long since I have mourned the dreams
these dreams we've left abandoned
And I'm haunted by your face and
the memory of your kisses, sweet kisses
Do you remember?
I still remember so much
I remember never feeling so alive
Do you remember?
I still can't forget your touch
We swore that we would never end
We knew our love transcended space and time
These memories slip away
The ghost of what we were is fading
But there is no more pain, which is funny cause that night I was dying
I was dying
Now I don't even recognize the girl I swore that someday I would marry
But I can't forget her face and I can't forget her kisses, sweet
kisses
Do you remember?
I still remember so much
I remember always feeling so alive
Do you remember?
I still can't forget your touch
We swore that we would never end
We knew our love transcended space and time
Do you remember?
I still remember so much
I remember never feeling so alive
Do you remember?
I still can't forget your touch
How we swore that we would never be alone
Do you remember?
I still remember so much
I remember never feeling so alive
Do you remember?
Cause I still can't forget your touch
How we swore that we would never end
We knew our love transcended space and time
We swore that we would never end
We knew our love transcended space and time

I feel your lips
I taste your skin
I need to know
I need to feel you from within
As your blood burns through my skin
I feel complete
I breathe you in
It's where you end and I begin
If only I could stay here...forever
So much to tell you
So much to confide
Now that I'm inside you
We are flesh
We are one
So why do I feel so much guilt for what I've done?
As your blood burns through my skin
I feel release
I breathe you in
It's where you end and I begin
If I could only stay here...forever
So much to tell you
So much to give you
So much to confide
Now that I'm inside you
inside you

Your soul a pit of stone,
the depths I wish I could have known
Dangerous, black and full of spite
thoughts of you fill my night
But now we lay naked on the floor
I'm lost, I'm drowning in your sould
I was some searching in your eyes
I find malicious laughter and a love that has died

You are haunting my reality
Your lies are the only truth that I believe
You are haunting my reality
Now everytime I think about you I die

Hatred runs me through me marrow deep
I long to tear your eyes out in your sleep
This passion can lead to evil crimes
Do I kill you or do I choose to die?
Acid burn etched through my brain
Someone dies before I go insane
I was searching for some answer in your eyes
I find malicious laughter and a love that has died

You are haunting my reality
Your lies are the only truth that I believe
You are haunting my reality
Now everytime I think about you I die

(LIES. LIES.)

Soon now you'll be gone -
I wish to God I could've known
I love you I hate you every night,
this longing for your soul has got me scared
But now we lay naked on the floor,
I'm lost, I'm drowning in your soul.
I was searching for some answer in your eyes
I find malicious laughter and lies, fucking lies

You are haunting my reality
Your lies are the only truth that I believe
You are haunting my reality
Now everytime I think about you I die

(Repeat : LIES)

Your soul a pit of stone,
the depths I wish I could have known
Dangerous, black and full of spite
thoughts of you fill my night
But now we lay naked on the floor
I'm lost, I'm drowning in your sould
I was some searching in your eyes
I find malicious laughter and a love that has died
You are haunting my reality
Your lies are the only truth that I believe
You are haunting my reality
Now everytime I think about you I die
Hatred runs me through me marrow deep
I long to tear your eyes out in your sleep
This passion can lead to evil crimes
Do I kill you or do I choose to die?
Acid burn etched through my brain
Someone dies before I go insane
I was searching for some answer in your eyes
I find malicious laughter and a love that has died
You are haunting my reality
Your lies are the only truth that I believe
You are haunting my reality
Now everytime I think about you I die
(LIES. LIES.)
Soon now you'll be gone -
I wish to God I could've known
I love you I hate you every night,
this longing for your soul has got me scared
But now we lay naked on the floor,
I'm lost, I'm drowning in your soul.
I was searching for some answer in your eyes
I find malicious laughter and lies, fucking lies
You are haunting my reality
Your lies are the only truth that I believe
You are haunting my reality
Now everytime I think about you I die
(Repeat : LIES)

Some nights i feel like i have died
Or something deep inside is dying
I try to understand my crimes
But there's nothing here that really matters
I don't want to believe in you
I can't believe in you
I don't want to believe in you
I can't believe in you

I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, but i can't stop myself

Now endless questions fill my head
Some nights i'm frightened by the ansers
No you can't hurt me, nothing's real
No pain you cause can last forever

I don't want to believe in you
I can't believe in you
I don't want to believe in you
I can't believe in you

I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, but i can't stop myself

One night i swore i'd die for you
There's nothing else i'd rather die for
But i'll try to live another night
There's too much hate to be forgotten

I don't want to believe in you
I can't believe in you
I don't want to believe in you
I can't believe in you

I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, i don't need it
I don't want it, but i can't stop myself

Lately I've noticed how much you've changed
Even though you swear you're the same
So why do I feel a million miles away?
And why do I feel like we're broken?
Why can't it be perfect like we used to be?
Why can't we be perfect?
Why can't it be perfect like it used to be?
Why can't we be perfect?
Perfect is how I once described our love
But that was before we fell apart
So why do I feel a million miles away?
And why do I feel like we're broken?
Why can't it be perfect like it used to be?
Why can't we be perfect?
Why can't we it perfect like it used to be?
Why can't we be perfect?
We used to be perfect
We used to be perfect
We used to be perfect
We used to be perfect

Lately I've noticed how much you've changed
Even though you swear you're the same
Why can't it be perfect like it used to be?
Why can't we be perfect?
Why can't it be perfect like it used to be?
Why can't we be perfect?
We used to be perfect
We used to be perfect
We used to be perfect
We used to be perfect

Now I'm so tired, so so tired of working this out
Going to give myself up, up to the truth of what this is, of what I am
Take from me all of my blood, take from me all of my head
This is the best thing I can do
Why is it me instead of you

(I come down)

Now this is real
I can't go back, caught up with everything here tonight
Going to fuck myself up
Going to throw myself away
Going to give this to you
Give you what I've become

First red on white then red on red
I left my soul back in my bed
This is the best thing I can do
Why is it me instead of you

(I come down)

I know your life is empty
And you hate to face this world alone
So you're searching for an angel
Someone who can make you whole
I can not save you
I can't even save myself
So just save yourself

I know that you've been damaged
Your soul has suffered such abuse
But I am not your savior
I am just as fucked as you
I am just as fucked as you
I can not save you
I can't even save myself
So just save yourself

Please don't take pity on me
Please don't take pity on me
Please don't take pity on me
Please don't take pity on me

My life has been a nightmare
My soul is fractured to the bone
And if I must be lonely, I think I'd rather be alone
I think I'd rather be alone

You can not save me
You can't even save yourself
I can not save you
I can't even save myself
Save yourself
So just save yourself

If only see myself
reflected in your eyes
So all that I believe
I am essentially are lies
And everything
I've hoped to be or ever thought
I Died with your belief
in me so who that hell am I?
I don't know if I'm real without you
What is left of me without you?
I don't know whats real without you
How can I exist without you?

I'm wondering 'round confused
Wondering why I try
The more that you deny my pain
The more it intensifies...
I need someone to ache
for me the way I ache for you...
If you ignore that I'm alive
I've nothing to cling to
I don't know if I'm real without you
What is left of me without you?
I don't know whats real without you
How can I exist without you?

I stare in this mirror
So tired of this life
If only you would speak to me
or care if I'm alive
Once I swore I would die for you
But I never meant it like this
I never meant like this
no i never meant like this
I don't know if I'm real without you
What is left of me without you?
I don't know whats real without you
How can I exist without you?

She's beem here so many times
Before she can't remember
When she last felt anything at all
But this fear and anger
She states intently at the door,
Listens for his footsteps
She knows exactly what's in store
And the knowing makes it worse
When he calls her daddy's little girl,
She doesn't keep him
And when he crushed her
She can't feel her screems are silent
Hides in the corner of her mind
Where she plays contentedly
She leaves this night more far behind
Escapes inside her dreams

Floating high above her bed
Staring at her father's head
Wishing one of them were dead
So this hell could finally end

I feel it slipping away
I gave it all and no one cared
I feel it slipping away
I got it slipping away
I gave it all and no one cared
I feel it slipping away
I feel it slipping

I feel it slipping away
No more pain, no more fear
I feel it slipping away
I feel it slipping
I feel it slipping away

I just can't learn to forget
Now I'm choking on the memories
Choking on regret
I tried but I can't find a way
To untangle all the pieces
After they've been thrown away
I feel it slipping
I feel it slipping away

I will not suffer this loss
Of you again and again and again
I refuse to continue to live
In this perpetual nightmare
I decide it ends right here
I feel it slipping
I feel it slipping away

I feel it slipping... slipping
Everything is slipping away

each night i feel the distance that has grown between us
open up as lonely the space between the stars
i wish that i could find a way
to smash my fist right through these walls
of ugliness and emptiness
and gently touch your face

but every time that i touch you
you feel so far away
and every time that you need me
i feel so far away

as you lie silently beside me choking back your tears
i wonder if you recognize
that silence now defines us
desperately i try to fight this overwhelming sense
that i may never find the strength to change
how hopeless we've become

and every time that i touch you
you feel so far away
and every time that you need me i feel so far away

we need to find a way to break this silence
we need to find a way to break this silence
we need to find a way to break this silence that's between
so i scream your name

but every time that i touch you
you feel so far away
and every time that you need me
i feel so far away
and every time that you reach out
you feel me pull away
and every time that i touch you, i touch you, i touch you,
you feel so far away

wasted thoughts of you

desperate prayers to you

give me back my mind

I'm empty inside
And it's so wrong that I need you
it's so wrong that I need abuse
And it's so wrong that I need you
so wrong that I'm scared I'll die alone

what have I become?

everything's undone

a candle burns here in your honor
my soul, a shrine i've built for you
there's nothing left inside me
nothing left inside but you
And it's so wrong that I need you
it's so wrong that I need abuse
it's so wrong that I need you
so wrong that I'm scared I'll die alone

can't seem to pretend
this night needs to end
I can't fill this hole
you are all i know
And it's so wrong that I need you
it's so wrong that I need abuse
And it's so wrong that I need you
so wrong that I'm scared I'll die alone

wasted thoughts of you
desperate prayers to you
give me back my mind
I'm empty inside

what have I become?
everything's undone
a candle burns here in your honor
my soul, a shrine i've built for you
there's nothing left inside me
nothing left inside but you

can't seem to pretend
this night needs to end
I can't fill this hole
you are all i know

it's so wrong that I need you
it's so wrong that I need abuse
it's so wrong that I need you
so wrong that I'm scared I'll die alone

Sit alone, contemplating
What is missing inside me
I desperately try to remember
A life that's not meant to be
I meditate and try to recapture
Some sense of reality
But I look around
I've seen numb empty faces
The world is waiting to die
And this apathy is so suffocating
The slow decay of my mind
I've searched the world
For someone with answers
The questions that are plagueing me
I scream in vain at anyone who'll listen
But everybody's watching TV
Is anyone alive?
But am I lost in a world where nothing matters?
Am I lost in a world where no one cares?
Is anyone alive?
Is anyone alive?
But are we lost in a world where nothing matters?
Are we lost in a world where no one cares?
Is anyone alive?
Is anyone alive?

All I need is the air you breathe
All I need is the air I breathe
All I need is the air we breathe
All I need is the air I breathe
There're so many things we need so desperately
And the TV preaches we can't live without them
But tell me what is need I'll tell you what I believe
If I owned the world without you it would all be worthless
Cause you are everything
The only thing that matters
You are everything
The only thing I need
You are everything
The only thing that matters
Cause you are everything
You are the air I breathe
What if someday we took all their toys away
You think they'd find the strength to go on living
Cause deep inside I know if I lost everything I owned
I'd be a king as long as you're beside me
Cause you are everything
The only thing that matters
Cause you are everything
The only thing I need
Our love is everything
The only thing that matters
Cause you are everything
You are the air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
I hope someday they find a place to bid online
Where all lost souls can buy their life some meaning
I know we´ll survive all we need's more time
As long as we've got love and art and the ocean
And you are everything
The only thing that matters
You are everything
There's nothing else I need
Our love is everything
The only thing that matters
Cause you are everything
You are the air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
You are everything
The only thing that matters
You are everything
There's nothing else I need
Cause you are everything
The only thing that matters
Our love is everything
You are the air I breathe
You are everything
You are the air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe
The air I breathe

Lost in a world of doubt and insecurity
Nothing that you hold sacred, nothing you believe
Your life is a contradiction
While you thrive on manipulation
I fight to just hold on to what I believe

I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become you

You treated me like I'm a worthless piece of shit
You think you're in control but you make me sick
I want to watch you suffer
The way That you've made me suffer
I want to fuck up everything you've ever loved

I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become you
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become you

The night is cold as I roam these streets
The air is thick with hints of coming rain
Your face flashes through my head I swallow pain
So this is how it feels to be betrayed

This is what it looks like
This is what it feels like
This is what it tastes like
This is what you've done to me
This is what it looks like
This is what it feels like
This is what it tastes like when

You throw this all away (Silent)
You throw this all away (Laughing)
You throw this all away
You throw this all away

The lake is rough as I sit quietly
Remembering how our life used to be
An angry vacant silence fills my head
Now all the empty promises are dead

This is what it looks like
This is what it feels like
This is what it tastes like
This is what you've done to me
This is what it looks like
This is what it feels like
This is what it tastes like when

You throw this all away (Silent)
You throw this all away (Laughing)
You throw this all away
You throw this all away

The night is old, the sky a shade of gray
The tears roll off my face die in the rain
An angry vacant silence fills my head
Now all the empty promises are dead

This is what it looks like
This is what it feels like
This is what it tastes like
This is what you've done to me
This is what it looks like
This is what it feels like
This is what it tastes like when

You throw this all away (Silent)
You throw this all away (Laughing)
You throw this all away
You throw this all away
You throw this all away (Silent)
You throw this all away (Laughing)
You throw this all away
You throw this all away

I know I should have told you
I was so afraid you'd leave
And now there's nothing left to say
Well nothing that you'd believe

I never meant to hurt you
With the things i couldn't say
I'd promise you tomorrow
While denying you today

These words have torn my world apart
A darkness grows inside me
In shading fades of gray
All the colours of the world
Are slowly sucked away

I'm sinking ever deeper
To a place that's cold and black
I can't believe i lost you
And you're never coming back
These words have torn my world apart

Soon the night will take me
And save me from my pain
Cloak me in cold darkness
And help me lose your name
These words have torn my world apart

You don't understand this, I think you never did
Silently I search for a reason to exist
I've found a way to feel you, I feel so fucking old
You're burning up inside me, but I feel so fucking cold

You are clutched tight in my fingers
You caress my skin so light
You are welling up inside me
You have finally freed yourself
You are flowing 'cross my pale skin
You are running down my arm
You are salty as I taste you
I have finally made you warm
I have finally made you warm

You stare at me so silent, you stare at me so cold
I think you stare right through me, that stare has made me old
I've found a way to feel you, I feel so fucking old
You're burning up inside me, but I feel so fucking cold

You are clutched tight in my fingers
You caress my skin so light
You are welling up inside me
You have finally freed yourself
You are flowing 'cross my pale skin
You are running down my arm
You are salty as I taste you
I have finally made you warm
I have finally made you warm

Take this... As an offering
Take this... As a sign
Take this... As an offering
How much can you take from
How much can you take from me?

I sink into this darkness, I sink into this cold
This emptiness is calling, I've nothing left to lose
I've found a way to kill you, I feel so fucking cold
You're burning up inside me, I feel so fucking old.

You are clutched tight in my fingers
You caress my skin so light
You are welling up inside me
You have finally freed yourself
You are flowing 'cross my pale skin
You are running down my arm
You are salty as I taste you
I have finally made you warm

Take this... As an offering
Take this... As a sign
Take this... As an offering
How much can you take from?
How much can you take from?
Take this... As an offering
Take this... As a sign
Take this... As an offering
How much can you take from?
How much can you take from me?

Voices whisper softly in the darkness
Cries of accusation, evil, lies
Voices echo - screaming, throbbing, laughing
Peel back my skull and look inside

Violent Mood Swings

Footsteps echo heavy off the pavement
Violence burning brighter in my eyes
Life within the flesh still diving deeper
and a random, victim businessman will die

Violent Mood Swings

Someone screaming softly in the distance
I run to seek my refuge from the light
until the darkness once more falls upon me
I'll kill again to live another night

Violent Mood Swings

I've spent my life running from an emptiness that haunts me
And I've spent my whole life trying to fuck the loneliness away
And I die inside when I think of all the people I have damaged
And I'm tired, I'm so tired
And there's no one else except myself to blame
My life's been wasted (Everything is gone)
My life's been wasted (And I am all alone)
My life's been wasted (There is no one else)
My life's been wasted (It's time I face myself)
And I've spent my life trapped inside a cycle of self destruction
And I've spent my whole life trying to numb the pain inside my soul
And tonight I cry when I realized how fucked this world would blow up
I'm tired, I'm so fucking tired
Gonna find a way to keep my faith alive
My life's been wasted (Everything is gone)
My life's been wasted (And I am all alone)
My life's been wasted (There is no one else)
My life's been wasted (It's time I face myself)
When I reach the end
Will anything I've done mean anything?
Now when I reach the end
Will anything I've done mean anything?
Will anything I've done mean anything?
Will anything I've done mean anything?
My life's been wasted (Everything is gone)
My life's been wasted (And I am all alone)
My life's been wasted (There is no one else)
My life's been wasted
My life's been wasted (Everything is gone)
My life's been wasted (And I am all alone)
My life's been wasted (There is no one else)
My life's been wasted (It's time I face myself)

you make it hard to breathe
it's as if I'm suffocating
and when you're next to me
I can feel your heartbeat through my skin
it makes me sad to think
this could all be for nothing
I wish there was a way
a way for you to see inside me
I've never felt this way
about anyone or anything
Tell me!
what do I have to do
to make you happy?
what do i have to do
to make you understand?
what do i have to do
to make you want me?
and if I can't make you want me
what do i have to do?

I know exactly what you're thinking
but I swear this time I will not let you down
I'm not as selfish as I used to be
that was a part of me that never made me proud
right now I think I would try anything
anything at all to keep you satisfied
God I hope you see what losing you would do to me
all I want is one more chance, tell me
what do I have to do
to make you happy?
what do i have to do
to make you understand?
what do i have to do
to make you want me?
and if I can't make you want me
what do i have to do?

what do I have to do
to make you happy?
what do i have to do
to make you understand?
what do i have to do
to make you want me?
and if I can't make you want me
what do i have to do

I know the tears you're ctying in your bed at night alone
I've cried those tears a thousand times
But those shallow empty songs about suicide are patronizing
You've got to learn to face your fears

Or do you think I'll be less lonely when I'm dead
It can't silence all the voices in my head
I close my eyes but I can't make it go away...
Do you think I'll be less lonely when I'm dead
When I'm dead

I know the songs you're singing saying nothing loud and clear
I've heard that song a thousand times
But your noble empty lies about suicide are patronizing
You can never understand what I feel

Or do you think I'll be less lonely when I'm dead
It can't silence all the voices in my head
I close my eyes but I can't make it go away...
Do you think I'll be less
God I pray I'm less lonely when I'm dead
When I'm dead

I am not here
I think I've never been here at all or ever will be
I feel like a place
Where no one goes anymore
Why can't you see that everything's
Why does it seem this life's broken? turned gray?
I can't believe in anything sacred
When I don't believe that I am real
It seems so bizarre
But none of this matters
Thoughts disappear, hope has died
Now I am safe, nothing can hurt me here
Why can't you see my need for forgiveness?
The truth and the lies confused as one
I can't believe in anything sacred
When I don't believe in anything
I am alone
Locked in my memories
Why does it seem that everything's different?
Why does it seem that only you are real?
I don't believe in anything sacred
So, why do I feel so damned alone?
I need someone to break the silence
That's screaming in my head
And in my soul