Lori Mckenna

Well the sky might fall and I'm Chicken Little yelling
While I am floating out to sea
Well I am tugging at your ear for some attention
Don't you give a damn about me?

I'll be the first to say there's a child inside my body
Can't pay the bills but I can spend
Will you love me when I am torn and terrible?
Will you even know me then?

I am a lion, I am lamb
Will you love me as I am?
As I am

Well the earth is shaking right below your feet you know
'Cause I am crawling underground
Say you love me, you can tell and I will show
Don't you even know what you've found?

I am a lion, I am lamb
Will you love me as I am?
As I am

Well you can take or you can leave me
I am not God so don't believe me
Tell me how you'd like to need me
Love is all
Love is all

Will you love me for what is right before you?
What you see is what you get
Well I am growing old and life may be downhill
Don't think I haven't reached my potential yet

I am a lion, I am lamb
Will you love me as I...
As I am
As I am

This is cold and dark, this place
You are broken, what will replace
The hole that has been dug here
Emptiness left where
Once I was so aware
Aware of you

You are quiet, you are meek
Unlike me so indiscreet
I am plainly alone
Once you open up, you close
I fell, I'm winning, then I don't know
Who you are

You came to me so battered and alone
You wondered how to go on
Life is unforgiving
And you need to forgive
Well look at me, your childhood friend
Who's never had the trouble to be stepped on
I wish you'd see
That you can borrow me
So push me where you want
Let in all the ghosts to haunt
I welcome such trouble
But what if things don't change
And you find yourself to blame
For all this alone

Well I have listened to your silence
These walls are beaming with forgiveness
You are up and then you're down
But mostly you're somewhere in-between
You should be free
Until then borrow me
Borrow me
Carry your troubles so heavy
Over your heart and then through me
Your mind's a separate matter
When your eyes are blind, I see
When your voice is swallowed, I speak free
And love you like I do

Well I am not an angel
Sent from heaven to save your soul
I am just a no good sinner
Who loves you more than life
You could be free
Wouldn't you rather borrow me?

don't tell her that I drink tea and not coffee
I'd prefer if you didn't talk at all about me
even in a brief casual chat
don't tell her how I loved your smile, or things like that

don't tell her how I was your best friend
don't tell her how it could never work out in the end
don't tell her how you learned a lesson from me
and that's why you have to take things slow and easy

if you can forgive me for my faults
then maybe it can work out after all
I can't stand anybody knowing me the way you do
and I can't stand the thought of her knowing you

don't tell her about that camping trip we took
don't tell her how I bite my lip and never finish a book
don't tell her how I like to sleep in late
or that I believe in romance and fate

well, what if we meet on some cross-town street?
and you'll introduce us and we'll finally meet
and I'll be alone when you're walking away
and I'll be wondering what she's going to say
well, I know we'll never be the way we were
but don't tell her

don't tell her that I'm too old for my age
don't tell her that this love of mine was just a stage
she doesn't need to know my point of view
she'll never love you like the way that I do

Well I know your life has been hard
I see it in your eyes and I feel it in your heart
When your eyes move down to the floor
And your mouth changes shape, and your voice sounds sore
I can hold you close in my arms
And tell you that you're special
And that you treasure such great charms
And that you always keep my heart full
But I'm hardly speaking a word
I'm hardly speaking a word

And I know these things should be heard
But I'm hardly speaking a word
And your struggle never changes me
I'll never be able to see the things you see
They say that you see things differently
Just because it's different doesn't mean it can't be free
But I'm hardly speaking a word
I'm hardly speaking a word

So I wonder, what do they know
Maybe the problem is me not letting go
Of a little boy who's smarter than me
Who can't sit still and sees things differently
And I'm yelling when I should be whispering
I'm pushing when I should be carrying
And I don't understand anything I've heard
I should be yelling I love you
But I'm hardly speaking a word

So I wonder, what do I know
Maybe the problem is me not letting go
Of a little boy who's smarter than me
Who can't sit still and sees things differently
And I'm yelling when I should be whispering
And I'm pushing when I should be carrying
And I don't understand anything I've heard

I should be yelling I love you
I should be yelling I love you
I should be yelling I love you
But I'm hardly speaking a word

HOLY WATER
(recorded live at The Blackthorne Tavern, per liner notes)
by Lori McKenna

Ain't going to sell my soul, well I'm not that dumb
Things are never what they seem.
Down at the cross roads I got better things to sell,
I'm going to sell some of my dreams...

Going to package them up,
Two for a buck,
And with any luck
I'll buy me some Holy Water, gonna to wash me clean,
And that Holy Water is gonna to wash me clean...

Well, I've seen the devil, says he's going to buy me time,
make my dreams come true
I say baby, baby, baby you don't know my kind.
this is what I'm going to do.

Going to package them up,
Two for a buck,
I'm going to sell them cheap and keep the water running.
Gimme some Holy Water, going to wash me clean
And that Holy Water is going to wash me clean...

If you see me with the devil by my side
Well I am guilty by association, I can't lie.
But I can hear their cries and I can hear their screams
I'm going down to the crossroads to sell myself some dreams...

Oh hear me now, hear me now....

I line up with the sinners and wait my time,
saying I'm the one with dreams for sale
Dreams aplenty, two for ten dimes,
buy a lot and they won't fail...

Going to package them up,
Two for a buck,
I'm going to sell them cheap and keep the water running.
Gimme some Holy Water,

You gotta get me some, you gotta get me some
Holy Water, it's going to wash me clean...

And that Holy Water is going to wash me clean...

It's easy when you smile
We can talk a while
Just lie here in my arms
Safe and warm
Outside the night is so unclear
Stay here
And everything will disappear

It's easy when you laugh
Troubles cut in half
Where I will go without you?
I don't know
Outside the night is breezing by
Don't cry
And everything will be alright

Hold me, hold me, stay
Tomorrow's far a way
And so are we
And that's why it's easy
It's easy when you say
We can find a way
Don't worry about it now
We'll get through it some how
Outside the night is almost gone
Stay strong
And maybe we can still go on

Hold me, hold me, stay
Tomorrow's far away
And so are we

It's easy when you smile
We can talk a while
Just lie here in my arms
Safe and warm
Oh... oh easy
It's so easy when you smile

You and I for so many years
It's just not that easy to pack up the tears and the pain
And forget
We just can't end it when I'm not through with it yet
We build our walls and divide
And it's so much simpler when we don't have to decide
Who is right... as if it matters
There's never any doors and we've burned all our letters

But it's wrong
To live life without you
It's gone, I know it's gone
But I can't let it go
Knowing it will never be back

You and I through so many fights
And it's not about the one that we had the other night
It's the ones we've never had
When you close your eyes to me and pretend you're not mad

What if this is our one chance?
What if it's a test
And we failed?
We failed

You and I for so many years
It's just not that easy
to pack up the tears and the pain
And forget
We just can't end it when I'm not through with it yet

And it's wrong
To live life without you
It's gone, I know it's gone
But I can't let it go
Knowing it will never
Well I can't let it go
Knowing it will never
I can't let it go
Knowing it will never be back
Knowing it will never be back

One thing I've never learned is how to give up
So it's my destiny to bear this fate
They say that I'm still young but I'd better hurry up
And they're talking 'bout change
And it's a little too late

I'm really not just jumping to conclusions
It's all a matter of fact clear of illusions
You'll never love me the way I love you
So I'm paying the price
All my life

Just when I think I'm moving along
You come back singing a different song
A song of love, a song of sweet regret
Full of promises which are never met
And I'm paying the price
All my life

I know I'll love you still when I have grown old
Though you'll have taken all of my good years
And you'll have taken every chance away from me
My master for life
All my life

Just when I think you'll let me be
I'll awake knowing you've been haunting me
All day long I'll hear you singing in my head
The voice I love, the voice I dread
And I'm paying the price
All my life

Just when I think I'm finally free
I hear a voice gently calling me
Saying I'm just a little melody
What could be the harm in writing me?
And I'm paying the price
All my life

And I'm paying the price
All my life
Paying the price
All my life
Paying the price

Ruby's shoes would take her
A mile or so to school every day
Where the white people hated her
They'd scream and hold signs and tell her to go away

But Ruby's will was stronger
Than the bigots with the signs could ever know
She stopped every morning on the corner
And prayed that someday the pain would go

And she'd stop and she'd pray
That all the hatred would go away
She was only six years old but she knew
Walk a mile in Ruby's shoes

Ruby sat alone in the classroom
She never dreamed the other children wouldn't come
They hated her for the color of her skin
Well color is such an amazing illusion

She'd stop and she'd pray
That all the hatred would go away
She was only six years old but she knew
Walk a mile in Ruby's shoes

Now Ruby knew about Dorothy
And the ruby shoes that she wore
She wondered about Oz sometimes
Well, well no other child ever walked her shoes before

And she'd stop and she'd pray
That all the hatred would go away
She was only six years old but she knew
Walk a mile in Ruby's shoes

Ruby, if birds can always fly
Why oh why can't you and I?

Ruby's shoes would take her
A mile or so to school every day
Where the white people hated her
They'd scream and hold signs and tell her to go away

And she'd stop and she'd pray
That all the hatred would go away
She'd stop and she'd pray
That no other children would be raised this way
Ruby's shoes

If birds can fly
Then why oh why
If birds can fly then why oh why can't I

You say you think you can help me
Think of me as someone who bleeds
Well I never told you to love me
That's your sort of greed
I can make my own decisions
I can do what I want to do
And I don't have to share my addiction
With any of you

I'll be just fine out of my mind
I like it this way, I know when to pray
I'm in control till it swallows me whole

I know you'd like to control me
You always need to be right
Because I'm late once or twice
Lose a job or stay out all night
But I can see high above it
The world is a boundary for you
And I know that you'd like to see through it
The way that I do

I'll be just fine out of my mind
I like this it this way, I know when to pray
And I don't need any until I need more
I said I was sorry a hundred times before
And I'm in control till it swallows me whole

Well you say that you have to leave now
You can't stand the things that I do
And you know that I'll need this more
Than I'll ever need you

I'll be just fine out of my mind
I like this it this way I know when to pray
And I don't need any until I need more
And I don't need any until I need more
And I don't need any until I need more
And I'm in control
Till it swallows me whole
Till it swallows me whole
Swallows me whole

Tell me once that you love me, love me
Tell me lies that you'll call but I know you won't
I know you don't
All you want is to meet discretely
To make sure you don't still love me
And talk over coffee

I have cried your name so many times
What's one more time
I have cried these tears for you
So many times

Tell me once that you need me, need me
Not now, but you did need me then
I like to pretend
The place is cold and the table's sticky
I take a napkin, you watch me wipe it down
I'm just spinning round

I have cried your name so many times
What's one more time
I have cried these tears for you
So many times
What's one more time

And you will pay for my coffee
So you don't feel guilty
And then you'll go on and on about
How it's not me, it's you

I have cried your name so many times
What's one more time
I have cried these tears for you
So many times
What's one more time

I never took to smoking cigarettes
I never finish any drink I start
But you broke my heart

I can see clear through your thoughts some times
I know I can
When you say you need more time
And you think that I'll under stand
Well you can put your finger to your nose
You can tell me just where I should go
Then you can fly
And I'll wonder why

What if I could leap tall buildings in a
In a single bound?
What if I could tell the world I loved you
Without even making a sound?
What if I was smarter than Einstein's daughter?
What if I had x-ray eyes?
What if I could run to the top of the sun
And not even look like I tried?
Would you love me then?

Things are never easy
Nothing's ever clear cut
Just when I thought you wanted more
You tell me that you've had enough
Well I know I'm not beautiful
And I'll never be tall and thin
But these things mean so much
When you feel with your eyes and not within

What if I could leap tall buildings in a
In a single bound?
What if I could walk a cross the country
With out even touching the ground?
What if I was sorry for your sins?
What if I was Prince Charles's next of kin?
What if could change the world for you
I could make you love me if I wanted to
Would you love me then?
Would you love me then?
Would you love me then?

What if I could leap tall buildings in a
In a single bound?
What if I could tell the world I loved you
Without even making a sound?
What if I was smarter than Einstein's daughter?
What if I had x-ray eyes?
What if I could run to the top of the sun
And not even look like I tried?
Would you love me then?

The number to the house is on the door
But every time you open it as if you are not sure
If you even live here anymore
Anymore

Well, I know what you're about to say
I know that look there on your face
But I'm tired of reading your mind this way
So why don't you say it?

You're tearing me up inside
Tearing me up inside
It feels like something in me died
Feels like something in me died
All of the bright colours that lived inside of me
Are now just tiny little pieces of what used to be
And it just feels like confetti

Well, I remember on our wedding day
Thinking that all of those flowers would all just fade away
And it seemed like such a waste
Of beauty

And now you're tearing me up inside
Tearing me up inside
It feels like something in me died
Feels like something in me died
All of the bright colours that lived inside of me
Are now just tiny little pieces of what used to be
And it just feels like confetti
Confetti

Isn't it a crying shame
That nothing ever stays the same?
I can't fit into that wedding dress
Or be twenty-three again
But you're looking at me now
Like you don't know who I am

And it's tearing me up inside
All of the bright colours that lived inside of me
Are now just tiny little pieces of who I used to be
And it just feels like confetti
Confetti
Confetti

I went to high school with that kid
He was even strange back then
The type whose eyes don't leave the floor
Blend in with the cement

Well, I felt so bad for that kid
One day I saw his face turn green
And as he tumbled to the floor
The thought of reaching out never occurred to me

Why don't we open up
Knowing that we all falter?
When will we learn
To reach out for each other?

Well, he lived out on the edge of town
And I'm pretty sure he had a brother
It seemed that boy could walk for days
I suspect to avoid his mother

And I always knew he had it bad
Tougher than any of us others did
Still, I never asked him how he was doing
What could I do? I was just a kid

Why don't we open up
Knowing that we all falter?
When will we learn
To reach out for each other?

So, now he's the new town bum
He talks to himself and picks up cans all day
And when my kids ask me about him
What'll I say? What'll I say?

Why don't we open up
Knowing that we, we all falter?
And when will we learn?
When will we learn to open up
Knowing that we all falter?
When will we learn? (When will we learn?)
I said, when will we learn?
When will we learn
To reach out for each other?

You knocked those pictures right off the wall
I slammed the bathroom door so hard it doesn't close right at all
Last week we broke my mother's favourite serving plate
All just casualties of a love that's lost it's way
You and I baby don't even know how to fight
We don't know nothin' 'bout nothin'
Except how to survive

How come we keep this TV up so loud?
What are we so afraid of that we keep drowning out?
Well, this is not the life that we deserve
And talking might make it better
But what if it makes it worse?
Cause you and I baby don't even know how to fight
We don't know nothin' 'bout nothin'
Except how to survive

We take times just coming out for real
Oh, and I could cry about it but my tears don't work around here
Last night I caught myself just looking at you
But I only saw a stone wall, impossible to break through
Oh, you and I baby don't even know how to fight
We don't know nothin' 'bout nothin'
Oh, we don't know nothin' bout nothin'
Except how to survive
How to survive
How to survive

You never woke up beside a stranger
But you never spent the night alone
In your jacket is a flask of Southern Comfort
In your pocket you got a comb
I know you
I know you

You've been pushed right to the limit
Lived on a lonesome road
Chopped up an old pine dresser
To heat the house once in the cold
I know you
Yeah, I know you

Well, I know where you go when you want to be alone
I know just how hard you work and how much money you bring home
You love the sound of church bells but you hate sitting in the pew
Baby, I know you

D.H. Lawrence wouldn’t be your favourite poet
If you thought poetry was cool
You have too much pride to be a thief
And just enough gut to be a fool
Baby, I know you, I know you

Well, I know the sound of your thunder
And I know the smell of your rain
I know every time you walk out that door
You might stumble back in it again
Yeah, I know you
Yes I do, baby blue, I know you

Well, I know that you feel bad for every bad thing that you do
You got a scar on your right cheek and the fear of God embedded in you
Your mother had a wooden spoon and a shamrock tattoo
Baby, I know you

Well, no other woman's gonna feel beneath the skin that you are in
No other woman's gonna read your mind or be sorry for your sins
I know you
I know you

Well, I know what you look like just before you cry
I know how to make you sick and I know how to make you die
The only thing I could never do is let you say goodbye
Say goodbye
‘Cause I know you
I know you

You never woke up beside a stranger
But you never spent the night alone
In your jacket is a flask of Southern Comfort
In your pocket you got a comb

Well, I can fall in love in the middle of the afternoon
With the TV blaring in the very next room
I fall in love again at the end of a raging fight
The kind that keeps us staying up all night

But baby, I'm not crazy
I just love the way you look at me
Baby, I'm not crazy
I just expect ecstasy
And I'm trying not to take everything to the extreme
I'm wide awake and you're still my dream
Baby, I'm not crazy

Sometimes I hear a voice telling me that you're the only one
And I'd be nothing but a fool if I let this all come undone
Every now and then I see the vision of a perfect man
When you turn around and smile like you understand

That baby, I'm not crazy
I just love the way you look at me
Baby, I'm not crazy
I just expect ecstasy
And I'm trying not to take everything to the extreme
I'm wide awake and you're still my dream
Baby, I'm not crazy

Well, there's a dull sweetness in this life of ours
Pretty as graffiti
And I'm dancing without any music on
But you're the only one who sees me

Hey, baby, I'm not crazy
I just love the way you look at me
Baby, I'm not crazy
I just expect ecstasy
And I'm trying not to take everything to the extreme
I'm wide awake and you're still my dream
Baby, I'm not crazy

Oh, no
Baby, I'm not crazy
I just love the way you look at me
I just love the way you look at me
I just love the way you look at me
I just love the way you look at me

I am six years old in the back of my mother's car
And I will be seven in December
She will be gone by the beginning of next spring
And I will be left to remember
To remember

I ask my little questions and she laughs a little laugh
But she won't tell me where we're going
She looks in my eyes with her eyes in the mirror
And says, "Some things you're better off not knowing"
Not knowing

But I don't know what her voice sounds like
I don't know what her skin feels like
I only know what it might feel like
When a mother holds her daughter
When that mother knows she's leaving this life
Leaving this life

She's left with that reflection of me at six years old
And I have her eyes in the mirror
Well, she and I, we are defined by what we have lost
Don't you wonder whose loss is dearer?
Dearer

She doesn't know what my voice sounds like
She doesn't know what my skin feels like
And I only know what it might feel like
When a mother holds her daughter
When that mother knows she's leaving this life
Leaving this life

And I don't know what her voice sounds like
And I don't know what her skin feels like
I only know what it might feel like
When a mother holds her daughter
When that mother knows she's leaving this life
Leaving this life

Leaving this life
Leaving this life
Leaving this life

Understated, overrated site
Carnival ride
Curtains faded, thread bill rugs real nice
The baby stayed up all night

How wonderful
Rhinestones on black satin shoes
How beautiful
The ones I never get to use
No frills, no fuss, perfectly us
Unglamorous

Frozen dinner, jelly, glass of wine
Tastes just fine
Two bread winners, five kids in short time
With eyes just like mine

How wonderful
Crowded dinners at the kitchen table
How beautiful
One TV set, no cable
No frills, no fuss, perfectly us
Unglamorous

No diamonds in our bathtub rings
Peanut butter on everything
No frills, no fuss
Unglamorous
Unglamorous

How wonderful
A gravel road leading to a front door
How beautiful
Old wool socks on a bedroom floor
No frills, no fuss, perfectly us
Unglamorous
Unglamorous
Unglamorous

Someone was crying and the bells rang
Then I don't remember a thing
You were talking but the words came
From somebody else
Someone said “kiss her” and so you did
I was smilin' like a little kid
You kissed my teeth and then we both hid
Inside each other's arms

All you really need is someone to be here
Someone who never lets you disappear
And I will be that witness to your life
This may be just be a softer place to fall
But somebody will answer when you call
And I will be that witness to your life

You got that job and joined the Union
Fought every urge that told you to run
Stared down the barrel of an empty gun
And wondered a bit
Stopped listening to all your friends
They think this is where life begins and ends
No one reaches, no one transcends
They just learn to live with it

All you really need is someone to be here
Someone who never lets you disappear
And I will be that witness to your life
You should never have to be alone
Someone will always call you home
And I will be that witness to your life

All you really need is someone to be here
Someone who never lets you disappear
And I will be that witness to your life
Baby, I will be that witness to your life

I float, your car comes into view
And from our front lawn I just smile at you
And everyday I thank the Lord that you
Took the right road home

Well, I left your life by the side of the road
I got a clear conscience, decoded the code
Your bags are packed, you're already gone
And that's the last you'll hear of me
Move on, move on

I got a 'For Sale' sign and a brain in my head
I have paid my dues, I'm not crazy or dead
I know life is hard, well so am I
Don't cry for me, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye

‘Cause I have laid down my guns and ammunition
You can go now, you can go now, you can leave now
This is my written permission

Well, I've been fighting for you for most of my life
I fought as a girlfriend, I fought as a wife
Oh, prisoners they say are no one to love
Well, I am throwing in the towel, I am taking of the gloves

‘Cause I have laid down my guns and ammunition
You can go now, you can go now, you can leave now
This is my written permission

So when you tell Susan that you love her you can look her in the eye
And when you tell Gina you can look her in the eye.
You can sleep with yourself, you can sleep with your lies
Your lies, your lies, your lies

I'm okay now
Goodbye

Some do it for the kids, some do it for God
Some do it forever but some are frauds
Some taste perfection and love the flavour
But don’t stay beside me thinking you’re doing me some sort of favour

‘Cause I have laid down my guns and ammunition
You can go now, you can go now, you can leave now
I have laid down my guns and ammunition
You can go now, you can go now, you can leave now
This is my written permission
Written permission
Written permission

Well, she lives a few doors down
Says she wants you to take her out
Have some coffee somewhere
Just some coffee
You saw her out in the parking lot
And any plans you had you can break
So wash your face
Let yourself go

Everybody is a sinner
Everybody makes mistakes
And there ain't nobody
Who needs nobody
Don't forget to look her in the eye
Laugh and show your smile
There's not much more to lonely
Than being less lonely

I stood and watched the stars fade
Right there, from your eyes
Baby, I think I know just
What your next lover will be like

You hate cigarettes so she won't smoke
But she don't mind this bar you're in
She sits right up there on that stool
Puts her pocketbook down and smiles at you
You think she's about five foot three
That makes her taller than me
But you're not thinking about that now
No, it ain't right to think about that now

I stood and watched all the stars fade
Right there, from your eyes
Baby, I think I know just
What your next lover will be like

And I hope she can fix you
And I hope she's someone
Who will never let you down
I hope she reminds you nothing of me and
As crazy, as crazy as it sounds. I hope she's beautiful

‘Cause I still watched all the stars fade
Right there, from your eyes
Baby, I think I know just
What your next lover will be like

‘Cause there ain't nobody who needs nobody
There ain't nobody who needs nobody